Stupidist thing any bodys ever said to you, ever.

yes. (i hope you are being sarcastic)

%'s equal a total of 100.....so if you had $100 it would be whatever percentage they ask.

15% off of $100 would be a $15 discount or $85 for the item.
 
one girl when were were watching a video in science class. they showed a video of an elephant and a girl goes "awwww i love anteaters" she was completely serious.

also she had just got some new kind of bottled water, fiji or some shit, when she took a sip she goes mmm i love this water, she then holds it out to me and goes "try it its like, wetter than other waters"
 
i was once hangin out with this chica
and idk we were talkin about penguins
me: that sucks for penguins not being able to fly
her: wait, penguins cant fly?
 
this girl in my history class last year is probably the dumbest person to walk the earth.

teacher: [she was explaining something and just for shits and giggles she says] whats 1+2?

girl: 12

she was being 100% serious

i am a sophmore
 
mmkay.. well last night i was hanging out with a girl who was convinced that paris hilton was actually really smart. im sorry but no. she may put on an act, but she is not a smart person.

this is the bad one though. after watching jaws, she was that some of the filming was done by national geographic. and she was like "they shouldnt put that logo on there! because people will think that it actually happened!"

we were all just like uhh no they wont...
 
definitely parts service department from a fucking redneck girl at a redneckmotorcycle dealership called "pete's cycles" the bitch was so fucking stupid she was yelling at me that a certain attachment was for a yamaha wave runner and it said Sea Doo right on the label. Fucking rednecks.
 
sorry, i haven't slept in, let's see, 28 hours. oh my bike chain is broken. oh and when i went to the corner store today, all the Maxims were sold out. oh and i have anger management problems and i haven't seen my therapist in a month because she's on vacation. grrrrrr.
 
ok so i was in math class and the teacher put up something up like 17-51 odd and this girl asked "what does o.d.d stand for?" teacher said "odd it stands for odd" and started shaking his head. pretty rediculious
 
This wasn't said to me but I was involved and I thought it was pretty ridiculous. I'm a lifeguard right and we like to get to know the kids and whatever. Anyways these 3 10 year old girls were following me around and I was throwing them in the water and whatever just playing. Anyways one of them takes my hat and like teases me with it like HAAY YOU CAN'T GET IT! then some man walks over to the girls and said "ARE YOU GIRLS FLIRTING WITH THE LIFEGUARDS? THATS DISGUSTING I'M SURE YOUR PARENTS WOULDN'T BE HAPPY ABOUT THAT WHAT'S YOUR NAMES" like what the fuck they're 10 and I'm 19 I wouldn't exactly call that flirting haha. This happened at our little lifeguard picnic table where we chill and the supervisor was there. We all just stared and didn't say a word until this man left. See I wanted to tell him off but we have to be nice to everyone and bullshit and the supervisors take complaints way too seriously. So after he leaves I ask the girls if they knew that guy and they said they've never seen him before. So we were just thinking man that guy was a fucking retard. The girls were pretty creeped out by it too so I had to calm them down but man that was funny. What an idiot!
 
the other day i was at my friends house and his sister asked me how to spell retard. at which point him adn i could not stop laughing and she did not see the irony. it wassoo funny cuz shes like whats so funny?
 
a few minutes ago...

little sister: (watching tv) OMG!!!!!!

older sister: what!?!?!

little sister:chris brown is co-starring on sweet life of zack and cody!!!!

older sister: ZOMGGG!!!!!
 
my dad's gf's son: so were u alive when like, the blacks and whites were fighting?

dad: yeah, u mean the civil rights movement?

my dads's gf's son: so which side were you on?

dad: what?

my dad's gf's son: are you black?

dad: no.

i was laughing hysterically, the kid thought my dad was black becuase hes tan.
 
a couple from a girl in my english and history class last year. both were asked with entire seriosness...

"if the slaves on the slave ships were so hot and couldnt breath why didnt they just open a window?"

"did the greek gods come before, or after the dinosaurs?"
 
i wrecked my car and some guy pulled up like 15 mins after it happened and he was like "Did you wreck your car?" i just wanted to be like no i parked it around that tree.
 
my friends sister is retarded heres some of the shit shes said cant rember it all (ps shes not achually retarded)

" is iraq in southamerica"

"is there a west and east hemisphere"

cant think of anymore ill post some more
 
Dumbest shit I ever said, and I caught myself right as I started the sentence..

Rafting Guide: So we're about to come up on the swimming rapids

Me: Are those like.. rapids you can like swim in?

He told me the only reason he still had respect for me was because I had caught myself and knew I was a fucking idiot. Otherwise, my instructions were to "get the fuck off the boat". My friends will never let me live it down.
 
Waitress talking to some English people, clear distinct english accents... i overheard so I wanted to know where they were from in England....

Me: where were they from?

Waitress: I dont really know, somewhere in Europe I think Australia or something....

Me: :O....!!?
 
I'm sitting on the computer with my lady friend...I'm making some shirts on a website and there is a button that says "GET QUOTE" the button even has a dollar sign on it...she says, completely 100% serious, you should put a quote on the back of the shirt that would be so sweet...
 


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i just spent about an hour reading all of these

"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never

stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and

neither do we."~ George W. Bush

its sad that he is the most powerful person in the world.
 
I had a pretty dumb thing happen to me this past week. I was moving into my room which is originally designed for two people, but is also sold for one person. Upon my move in I noticed there were two sets of furniture. So, I put in a work order to have the company switch my room into a single tenant layout. Well, they told me I was required to have two desks in my room. So after 3 days of trying to beat logic into the office's head I emailed their manager and he removed the desk the next day.

here's the email I wrote to the guy:

Subject: Confusion

Mr. Foster,

My name is Chris Mercer, I recently upgraded my room to a super two. As I was moving in, I noticed that I have two desks in my room. I thought this was a bit odd considering I will only be needing one desk. So, I asked the staff to remove the extra desk. They informed me that I was required to hold on to the desk until I move out. I explained to the staff that I found it odd that I paid extra money for a larger room, but am put in a situation were I am unable to use the desired extra space. I was told that I am not obligated to keep the desk in my room and I can pay to have it stored. That left me feeling even more confused. I pay extra for a larger room, then have to pay more to use the extra space? I'm a bit lost in the logic. Shouldn't Bear Creek be storing the furniture that was provided for the 2 person housing? Afterall, I was informed that I would be provided with one set of furniture, not two.

If we could set up a meeting to talk about this that would be great or just email me back. I'd like to have this resolved before the large move-in date.

Thanks,

Chris
 
Me, my sister, and her boyfriend were watching TV and a commercial for the Beijing olympics and I quote my sister...

"Is this the summer or winter olympics?"
 
girl in my english class doing a presentation about holidays from 1800's - now.

girl: so they had christmas and easter and they went to church but were certainly not as extravagant and they are the same times as today and they also celebrated the fourth of july which was celebrated with fireworks and it was celebrated in may just like it is today

 
1. "How big is the 18in pizza?"

2. girl in class:"can we change marker colors. yellow is kinda hard to see"

teacher:"Do you hate yellow lily? yellow is the color of the sun. do you hate the sun? the sun gives life lily. do you hate life? do you?"

 
drunk as hell got written on my face kid goes to write his nick name (wood) on my forhead and i wake up after he gets woo done and i look in the mirror and say:

me: wood, you dumbass you tried to write your name backwards on my forhead

wood: no idiot your looking in a mirror

me:.....oh
 
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