The best gaper quotes

I agree, my home mountain only has moguls sometimes (and not real moguls) and it just gets sooo boring, there is nothing to challenge you in terms of steeps unless it is a powder day. do not take moguls for granted!
 
there have been moguls on seymour? bullshit

and thats what side hits are for, duh. bomb switch and have fun on side hits, ride park, thats what you do when theres no powder, or go ride unicorn in the pitch black
 
yes this is the best thing to do, me and my friend always try and unclip then take his snowboard from under his feet, much harder than it sounds
 
sometimes sterns stairway, noels flight has bumps, but not real big ones and they usually get groomed over ski school sometimes makes them on a powder day, at the end of cabin trail. where it leads down to the lift. last time we tried that they got ruined though, or groomed overand ya i do those things anyhow... duh
 
walking through the mountains cafe.
little kid "Mom, why is this boy losing his pant"

Me and my brother(coming back from skiing):(fermont)old lady: are you guys staying in the hotel?us: yes. The gold level, then left
her facial expression was great!

Haters makes us who we are.
 
A couple years ago, me and some buddies were in the line at the American Eagle at Copper when a group of 6 rednecks decked out with jeans and Nebraska Cornhuskers jackets and everything come out in front of us. They were obviously all drunk as fuck. So I say, "you guys know that this is a quad right?"Then one guy's like "no its a 6pack it says here on the map." I tell them that Super Bee is the 6pack and its on the other side of the mountain to which they say, "no look there's 6 people on that chair." At this point I give up and they attempt to load the chair and two of them make it on and the rest of them take each other out at the loading zone. Then everyone (the lifty included) just bursted out laughing.
 
guy that i kinda know tells me he can 270 on. (the type who just got a pair of scratch juniors for Christmas and think they are pro) proceeds to 50-50 a box that is as wide as it is long and claims he did it before.

also the look of horror from old gapers when they see you roliin with a tall t.

haters
 
Car ride to the mountain...

mom: what kind of helmet do you have?

daughter: I have a Red helmet.

mom: i thought the color of your helmet was white?

 
these quotes suck. its just a collection of 15 year olds trying to prove how much they know about skiing related shit. there are very few funny gaper quotes/stories on here.
 
people ruined this thread...and im bitter about the fact they continue to ruin it with stupid "a kid at my school doesnt know pollard rides for Line skis LOLERZZZ" posts.

Ill try and restart it:

dad furiously yells to his GF/wife who is snowplowing down the mtn "lean forward more!!!"...well she did and promptly double ejected to face plow.
 
i was with my friend in at blue mtn pa and he was skiing switch and this ski patrol lady yelled at him that skiing backwards wasnt allowed... we were in the fucking park
 
Aw, a thread you didn't start didn't go the way you wanted it to? Poor baby. And, not to burst your bubble, but that story is not at all different from any other, including any of mine.
 
haha it's so funny when bad skiers try to teach other people... once I was teaching and one kid in my class asked how you turn, and this other kid piped up "you lean into it!!" and I facepalmed. nooooooo that's not how!!
 
I hear "get out of my way!! I'm gonna hit the fucking jump!!" I got over to the side cuz I knew the freestyle team people get priority. I then saw this gaper pizza up the lip, reach the top, fall on his face and sit there crying for ten minutes.
 
Texan #1: I don get how they do that

Texan #2: Do what?

Texan #1: How those skiers keep their skis so close together. I like me a nice wide stance.

So ba
 
i have noticed, in most of these stories, everyone thinks their cool be being a dick to the gaper and "turning up my music" or "acting like i didnt hear them". if we hate gapers so much, why dont we tell them honest answers to their questions and then they wont be as much of gapers anymore, doing the things we hate??
 
I agree completely.Also, I think most skiers now forget where they came from; we were ALL "gapers" at one point. Nobody was BORN a NS user and nobody GREW UP in the park, learning everything. If the gapers know so little, it should be our responsibility to teach them, for the sake of the sport, and also to keep the mountains safe. Gapers not learning anything makes them unsafe, and that shouldn't be ignored.
 
I found some pics of me skiing about 6 years ago and I was pretty much the definition of gaper (I thought I was pretty badass at the time)
There's a difference between new skiers and deliberately ignorant people though... or the ones that think they know everything but really don't.
 
ha ha great thread! i have an ok one.

i was riding with a couple of my friends and they abandined me so i had to ride up with 3 obvious gapers. ( they had the blue jeans over the boots and the hunter jacket on.)

Gapper "so are you like a good skiier?"

Me" yeah I'm ok"

Gapper" so can you like do the helicopter?"

Me "you mean a grab with a spin?"

Gapper "no, my friend has skied for 3 years and every body calls it the helicopter"

i just got of the lift and shok my head. lol funny gapers!
 
alright guys its time to turn the page and start anew. how about hearing some real stories that are actually funny/original.
 
To be fair, all she did was take an interest in the sport. Which I think is awesome...even if she did use the word 'racing' instead of 'competing in a slopestyle competition'.
 
already tried to do this. never gonna happen when dealing with these youngins. A pretty funny one is over on TGR, though it does suffer from some of the same flaws, the overwhelming majority are pure gold.
 
So i was talking to this Indian guy named Rameesh about giving him private lessons so he can learn skiing. Somehow we got into talking about how i do freestyle and his comment was

"So do you put on shows?"
 
massive awkward turtle :)
almost as bad as when i was playing 'the world is not enough' on nintendo 64 and didn't know why the save file was called TWINE
 
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