The best gaper quotes

lady from florida: i hate the cold snow it burns my face.me: oh thats a bummer (sarcastically)lady: oh is that why you kids wear bandanas???me: um yeah, and i leave.
 
Ok then, I'm a noble guy, I admit after re-reading my posts I do sound like a jackass. So for that I apologize Bulbasaur.
 
Also, I have a slightly gaper story finally! It's not great though since I am in the prairies and people rarely say stupid shit here with regards to skiing.
 
The best I've gotten was when I was skiing switch down a run out of the park which is under/beside the main lift some dude didn't see him, just heard it from above as I went by their chair.

"Hey that's dangerous, don't do that!!"

My friend responded with: "Skiing's Dangerous get over it"
 
stupid Mobile NS!

Ahem:

I was getting fitted for new boots and I brought my skis in case a remounting was necessary (it was, cost a gruesome $80 CAD on my already bloated pricetag) and one shop tech asked if those were my Salomon skis.

I immediately said no as I don't own any Salomon skis, but then I saw he was referring to my '09 Line Anthems which happened to have a Salomon 'S' on them. I replied "Oh yes, those Line skis are mine."
 
I did something kind of gaper today. I was skiing around and dropping little cliffs here and there and after stomping one I spun around to see how far downhill I had landed and then I caught an edge and fell backwards and nailed my head on the ground. Right below the lift too. From an outside perspective on the lift: there was some fool who dropped some puny cliff and then he tried to ski switch and he fell on his ass. It was pretty funny even though my ego and possibly the back of my head were bruised.
 
i was skiing switch at wisp (in maryland, biggest icecube known to man) and caught some ice, freaked out, and ran right into a snowbank, winded myself, bruised my back and pretty much through off my groove for the rest of the day

 
dude i got wrecked. lay on the side of the trail for 10 minutes and then wheezed down to the lodge.last time i left the park that season

jk
 
waiting in the lift line with my friend whose helmet is plastered in jiberish stickers while wearing a jiberish tall tee. Someone behind us says to their friend: "Wow that guy really likes the Jonas Brothers."
 
at the parking lot putting boots on and a two gapers approched me...

Gaper: are those throwbacks?

me: aahh (confused), there full tilts.

Gaper: what are full tilts?, they look really old?

Gaper to other Gaper: those look really hard to ski with...

me: there brand new boots that tilt forward bro. (put on headphones and walked away)

 
its not a college essay, i dont give a shit about the spelling. and im guessing the those old raclies or whatever you call'em are so old no one rides with them, so i dont know about them.
 
They are the exact same boot, just a different liner.

So you can save alot of money by buying a cheap pair of rachiels and then new liners.
 
i was sat on this chair lift with this gapergoon and i tried to make conversation. Then he asked me what you call that trick where you spin around 360 degrees. I stopped talking to him.
 
i was messing around on a catwalk, and i was on tele.

I put my poles between my legs and went for the gaper tuck. being on tele i went forward and ate shit on to my shoulder.

messed up my shoulder and looked like a damn fool
 
Wow you must've felt sooo good about yourself, eh?

Gaper 1:so what's your son doing this year, snowboarding or skiing?

Gaper2: I dunno, he kept blabbing something about "twin tips"...

Gaper 1: Oh! Those are the skis that u can go backwards on!

Gaper 2:Oh, I guess it's so that if he messes up and lands backwards, he's fine eh?
 
You're dumb as fuck, you can't act elitist to some gapers when you don't even know what the hell your're taking about. GAPER!
 
not really a gaper thing but,

i was in the park behind my house, havin a little pvc pipe session with a friend, and some german guy ( i live in germany) comes up and says something to me in german, i said English?? he said, "your on the wrong hill" i laughed in side.
 
ULTIMATE SNOLLERBLADER SPOTTED AT BOYNE

photo cred: Me

1292638610-916097-537x720-1292638543snowllerblader.jpg
 
most gapers dont know about center mounting and stuff, so when i had my center mounted afterbangs on, gaper dad: those must be short skis. me: theyre 177 cm. gaper son: ooh you have pictures on your skis. i show them my tails, then they start talking how they work and all that crap. HILARIOUS THREAD-INATOR

 
about a year ago i was sitting on the lift 3 days after christmas with some random kid and his dad and the kid asked his dad what was for lunch, and then the dad said i dont know then kept asking me and he didnt undertand that you can pick what you want.
 
I was skiing with these two random kids from my school, i get ahead of the kid im with and he says

"You have some mighty goose tails"

That was about my twin tips...... wtf
 
Hahaha there was some snowblader bitching hardcore about the ski team making a jump at Sugarbush and he wasn't allowed to hit it. I was trying hard to hold back my laughter.
 
i havent so far, with the gel tongue, gel heel, and gel toe. admittedly the toebox does feel a bit more roomy than, say, an agent 80, but i dont think it has affected performance at all. soooooo comfy
 
so i was at my local mountian and i walked out of the lodge when an asian couple approched me, they guy says " these boots work in those?" i replyed " no those are snowboard boots, you need the kind of boots im wearing for skis." girl turns to guy and says "you! fucking retard!" i just laugh and walk away
 
one time one of my friends was filming un on the knuckle and there was a gaper and his child and in the back all you kad hear is "hey timmy, timmy watch timmy timmy, look, timmy, they are aproching the ramp timmy, are you gona see it (someone dose a 900) wow timmy, what was that a 720?" then for a frontflip he called a forward summersalt, a cork 7 a helocopter and them me fav was 2 years ago at a big air event where in the finals someone did a bio 7 and the anouncer said "he did a flippy spinny trick"
 
While on the lift with Tom Wallisch during the Dew Tour at Mt. Snow
Tom Wallisch to me: so hows the park today?Me: It's pretty good, a little slow, but its whatever.Gaper to Tom: Hey were you in that contest earlier doing all those tricky things?
1285215264facepalm.jpg


 
In the Whistler Creekside gondola....
Girl:do you ski them black inclines?Me: yea, the black runsGirl: I like the green inclines the most, ya know theyre really relaxing. I dont really like the blue inclines 'cause it will be like a green incline, but then the incline gets really steep.
face palm.
 
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