The best gaper quotes

worked at alta one winter.

ski free after three at its best

some asian wearing a football helping teach his 3 year old on wayyyy to big skis while he was one cross country skis

that were wooden.

also

"so you work here?

"yup"( im wearing a jacket that says Alta lifts_

"so you just stand around and watch people get on the lifts?"

"yup"

"that must suck espeically when its snowing hard."

note:its AWESOME when its dumping. i just never return from my ski break

 
ha yea, it is one huge run on

but in the end i hope you got it,dont really pay much attention to grammer and mechanics while on break
 
some kid that goes to my school just told me on Facebook that I need to commit to my spins more. I asked him what he could do, this was his response:

540 onto a box, and 5050 railslide a snowboard.
 
i guy on newschoolers started a thread saying:

it should not be called switch, it should be called fakie jus tliek snowboarders

now his karma is at 0
 
my hill blows snow in the park all day and night. it's dangerous, cause there is no visibilty . and it all around sucks.

 
So I in study hall I sit with this girl who is a decent boarder so like everyday we talk about skiing and shit, so we start talking about fucking our bases up and im like "yea i ski woods a lot so I have to tune my skis a lot because of trees and rocks and shit" And on that day theres another boarder with us and hes like "do you hotwax" and im like yea I asked im if he tunes his own board and hes like yea I us the iron and everything so im thinking he pretty legit. I asked what wax he uses and hes like "usually sex wax but if im out of that a candle" Im thinking now wtf is wrong with him then i try to explain u need to use real wax made for snow but he just insisted it didnt make a differencs.
 
gaper-"is that jump big?

me-"*chuckle* yeah its pretty big"

gaper-"how fast do you have to hit it"

me-"pretty fast" and i proceed to ski with my buddy.

lol there are so many more but usually its dumb shit like that...or...why do you have short poles? i get that like every time
 
On a lift Gaper #1 asking Gaper #2

Gaper #1 "How can you tell the difference between the real snow and the man-made snow?"

Gaper #2 "Well the real snow is cold"
 
ok so me and my family were watching a mogul competition on tv, i was criticizing their un-steezynesss lol so one guys did a flat-3, with his skis crossed, anyway my gaper sister was like "woah that was cool.... his skis were all crossed!" i laughed so hard
 
So today, just cruising around, decide to hit a small table up ahead. I'm about 50' from the jump, sitting down to do a hand drag, and out of nowhere, this big ass gaper riding 80's straight skis cut me off going way to fast for the jump, hits it, does the biggest (and most serious) spread eagle I have ever seen, and lands in the icy flats.
 
not a quote but today i saw a kid with a small firefly jacket, jeans, rental helmet with swim goggles, and 08 j.o. pros, pretty obvious he bought them for the graphic.
 
gaper: hey look the grind-rails are open here, they werent open at that other place

gaper's friend: is grinding hard on skis?

gaper: no its easy. i could do that grind-rail (points to a flat down box)
 
in gondola at loon:

me to my friend: the superpipes finally open

gaper: how bigs the superpipe? duz it go like from the top to the bottom? how would you stay on that long, and wont it wreck the bottoms of your skis?

 
I met this hilarious guy on the chairlift the other day. He started out by asking if we did the "stunt ramps" in the park. And then one of my buddies said something about him having a place in Sun Peaks, so this guy says, "A place in Sun Peaks eh? Now you all you need is a bottle and a couple a girls and you're gonna have a fun time."
 
last year i was in mammoth. i was riding up the chairlift with my dad and a friend. this gaper lady gets on with us....
Gaper lady: do you mind putting down the safety bar?Dad: Yes i mind. LEAVE IT UP. Gaper lady: Isnt it the law that you have to have it down?
the 3 of us are so in shock that we dont know what to say.
Gaper lady: Well im from colorado and its a rule that you have to have it down there.Us: HAHAHAHA YEAH, OK LADY Gaper lady: oh.....
 
Asshole. Why didnt you just put the bar down? What reason do you have to leave it up besides trying to look cool in front of others.
 
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