The best gaper quotes

a younger skier at my mountain:

him:what does 4bi9 mean?

me: 40s, blunts, ice, 9s

it;s a film production company/ski crew.

some of the best riders in the game....

him: 40s? blunts?

me it's pretty much straight gangster stuff.
 
Snowboarder at this party was talking about the xgames and when i said i went, he asked
"Wait you ski. so why did you go, skiiers can hit the jumps or the halfpipe" apparently we skiers arent in the x games.
 
I get like 10th chair on a 2 foot pow day with a gaper

Gaper: are those power skis?

me: there hellbents

Gaper: so yes?

me: fuck yes

then i turned my ipod up and stoped listing to the fucker
 
Blond Treehorn Thug: [holding up a bowling ball] What the fuck is this? The Dude: Obviously you're not a golfer.

greatest movie of all time.

 
not really a gaper quote but I was in the singles line at my local mtn which is crawling with gapers and asian tourists that can't speak english. I got on the lift with some guys and one of 'em is carrying his ski:

liftie:"hey man could you put on your ski"

kid"sorry man some kid let his snowboard go and it sliced off my toe piece"

liftie:"only at grouse"
 
today at the ski lift:

a few kids are jumping pick up`s just straight...

Gaper: look at this kids I think they would be ski jumper when they grow up! haha
 
i am generally pretty nice to the gapers but i do get a chuckle out of some of the stupid things that they say. but to all the people that are saying we seem like assholes for doing these thing to them just know that they probably make fun of people that don't know much about what they do also. so its all in good fun
 
yea people have been calling gapers joeys since before anyone on ns was even born. if your parents ski ask them what a joey is. they will probably know from back in the day lol, i know my parents do
 
not necessarily at the park, but

(on a calm day at a chairlift that "runs on wind power")

gaper "how do they run the lifts, there's no wind."
 
the salomon rep said this to me yesterday
rep:so how did you like the suspects?me:i didnt, they were not fun at allrep:o well your just a park rat i wouldnt expect you to know how to ski well
 
you should have told him as the company that is pretty much the pioneer of twins they should know how to make a ski that lasts a week
 
hahaha another instructor at my hill asked the rossi rep in the demo booth if they had any twintips to demo and she said "no, people might take them into the terrain park."
 
on the weekend I was on the lift with this lady and another guy and we were going over the park. they were commenting on the park features. there was a small roller jump that had markers on the sides and she was like "oh, this must be the race course."

It was kind of funny but I can understand her mistake, as the markers kind of looked like gates...?
 
I was riding the lift at Jackson, looking pretty damn steezy. Red coat, white pants, empire hat, empire gloves. I get on with this family of three. A mom, dad, and little girl (probably about 7 years old). The man asks me 'So, where you been skiing today?'

"oh, i hiked the headwall twice, then played around in Moran woods for awhile.' The little girl, in the sweetest voice 'do you do double diamonds?' 'yeah...' the dad 'how often do you ski?'

'about 20, 25 days a year' 'are you local?' 'No, i live in boulder.' The dad, 'my god, that is the life.' Huge sigh...
 
Some kid at Stratton a few weeks ago comes up to me and my buddie to ask us a questionGaper Kid: Do you guys know where the trick track is?Us: Yea *proceed to point him in the right direction*As he's riding away he's singing to himself oh yea, going to the trick track
 
ridin up bonanza @ PC today, 2 gapers in like those gaitors with the nose slot that looks like a beak.......etc.... but out of nowhere, right in the middle of the ride, one of them says

"Ok, so if either of us falls off the lift, you have to ski, um, down to the lift that you fell off,...."

other gaper: "wutt?"

proceed to full volume......not enough cuz my headphones are dead...
 
this gayper texan was standing like 15 ft away from me, i pop a flat ground 1 for fun, and shes like "im so sorry, was i in your way?" i think i scared her haha
 
So I was on the lift today with this old gaper who must have been around 70. He spent the entire ride up telling me about how he cracked three ribs in January by falling on his poles, and lecturing me on how using poles is bad for your health. This guy is going on and on about how people really shouldn't use poles because they can get hurt, all the while holding his in his hand. We finally were almost at the top when he realizes that I didn't have any poles, and he starts congratulating me as if I've won an award or something. We get to the top, he reminds me to never use poles so I don't break ribs like him, he gets off the lift and proceeds to hold his poles upside down, and skied away. I laughed so hard I thought I was going to die
 
i was wearing my hellbents:

sitting on the chairlift...

Gaper: you should get new skis man they are bent really bad.

i nearly jumped off the lift
 
whats so bad about a family making conversation?

some of you guys on here are such elitist douchebags... yeah a lot of the things gapers say/do is hillarious, but half of you are just ripping on people new the the sport who are trying to be friendly.
 
On the chairlift a few years ago with a father and son (who's about 10), and the perk was right below us. Some guy pulls a steezy mute 7, lands, then goes to switch for the next rail

Son: OMG!!! TaHt GuY dID TeH ThReE-sIxTy!!!

Father: WoW, ThAt WaS cOoL

Son: OmGzOrZ!! NoW hE's GoIn TeH bAcKwArDzZz!!

Me: *laugh*
 
Gape: my greatest trick is a bakflip but i want to learn how to do MCtwistsMe: o word. what exactly is a "mctwist"?Gape: um not quite sure actually i haver never landed one, i think its a 360 flipMe: what kind of flip?Gape: ummmm, i think front flip 360

this guy was the biggest clown ive ever met hahaha
 
G: Do you ski?

M: Yea

G: Nice! Me too!

M: Oh yea? What kind of skiing?

G: Mostly tricks.My favorite is the metal things (rails)

M: Oh cool... what can you do?

G: I just slide reallly fast down the metal things... this one time i was going like 80km/h on a metal thing! I swear!

M: *laugh and walk away*
 
So this one time... this really crude gaper says to me "Did you do KOOl stuff in the trick track?" and i was like dude your a gaper go to hell.
 
I never said it was a bad thing. He just sounded soo incredibly jealous i felt kinda bad for him. Nothing against the family except for their choice to live in florida.
 
haha all these are good

ive gotten the classic "Do you ski them expert black dimond runs" always at blue moutain in PA a couple of kids were on the lift with me and they asked me where the backcountry was at the mountain. Meanwhile there is not and inch of snow on the sides of any trails

 
Going up the T-bar with a gaper:

Gaper:"you seem pretty good at skiing. Are you going to the Olympics?"

Me: "No I don't think I'm good enough"

Gaper: "Really you go fast on diamond runs"
 
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