nice pants, wanna fuck (never worked - but twice I didn't get slapped)
nice pants, they'd look better on my floor (gotten a couple laughs)
Wanna go for a pizza and a screw, what you don't like pizza?
I forgot my phone number, can I borrow yours
my friends over there bet me $50 I wouldn't come over and talk to you try to get your phone number, so you wanna have a couple drinks on them? (this one worked - but I spent my $50)
The funniest ones I've heard were my friend Stew, whos really short and looks like a troll:
I'm taller laying down than I am standing up
I may buy my pants in the boys department, but I buy my underwear in the mens. (He really fucked this, and the whole place started cracking up when he walked up to this chick saying ''I may buy my boys in the..., oh shit, uhhh''