Korny jokes that took you a secondd...

whats brown and rhymes with snoop?

dr dre

how do u kill a fox,

give it cancer and makee it run across canada

so i was surfing on my trip in australia and i kep seeing this girl at the beach everyday, she was always crying. i went up to he and discovered she had no arms or legs, i was surprised and i asked her what was wrong, she said she had never been huged before, so i gave her a hug. the next day she was crying agin so i asked her waht was wrong this time. she said i have never been kissed . so i gave her a kiss and went surfing agian. the third day i went back she was there again crying, i asked her again wht was wrong and she said well i have never been fucked. so being the gentalman i am i picked her up, carried her over to the water, then tossed her in. and said alright now your fuckd!

lolz , and jsut so you know i thought the fox one was funny i dont actully hate foxes ;)
 
so dexter is talking with his good friend, suddenly, his friend says: Yo, do you know where's my gf?

so dexter replies: i dunno man, just me
 
A carnivore is a dinosaur that eats meat. An herbivore is a dinosaur that eats plants.What is a dinosaur that eats everything?

An Omnomnomnivore.
 
what do you call 2 guys with no arms and no legs who hang around a window all day?
kurt and rod
what do you call a man with no arms and no legs at the bottom of a hole?
phil
what do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in the water?
bob
what do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of a shark tank?
fucked
 
A furniture dealer, Bob from Tennessee, decided that he wanted to expand the line of furniture in his store, so he decided to go to Paris, France to see what he could find.

After arriving in Paris (this being his first trip ever to the French capital), Bob met with some manufacturers and finally selected a line that he thought would sell well back home in Tennessee. To celebrate the new acquisition, he decided to visit a small bistro and have a glass of wine. As he sat enjoying his wine, he noticed that the small place was quite crowded, and that the one other chair at his table was the only vacant seat in the house.

Before long, a very beautiful young Parisian girl came to his table, asked him something in French (which he did not understand), and motioned toward the chair. He invited her to sit down.

Bob tried to speak to her in English, but she did not speak his language .So, after trying to communicate with her for a couple of minutes, he took a napkin and drew a picture of a wine glass and showed it to her. She nodded, and he ordered a glass of wine for her.

After sitting together at the table for awhile, Bob took another napkin, and drew a picture of a plate with food on it, and she nodded. They left the bistro and found a quiet cafe that featured a small group playing romantic music They ordered dinner, after which he took another napkin and drew a picture of a couple dancing. She nodded, and they got up to dance.

They danced until the cafe closed and the band was packing up.

Back at their table, the young lady took a napkin and drew a picture of a four-poster bed. To this day, Bob has no idea how she figured out he was in the furniture business.
 
What's the difference between my wife and my cock?
I only beat my cock twice a day...

What do you do if your dishwasher breaks down?
Slap her, and put her hands back in the water...

How many guys does it take to open a beer?
SHE SHOULD BRING IT TO YOU OPEN!

Let's keep this thread going forever!
 
A black man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder

the bartender says " sorry sir you can't bring him in, no animals allowed"

The parrot flies up to the bar and orders a beer.
 
how do you circumsize a redneck?kick his sister in the chin
Why is Santa so jolly?He knows where all the naughty girls live
what did the egg say to the pot of boiling water?its gonna take me a minute to get hard, I just got laid by some chick
 
A chinaman goes to his eye doctor because he is having problems seeing. The doctor says: "I have good news, we have found the problem, you have a cataract" The chinaman replies: "No, I have a Rincoln Continental...now what's wrong with my eyes?"
 
What is the worst part about having sex with 7 year olds?

Getting blood on your clown suit
 
whats the difference between a black man and a couch?

a couch can support a family.

whats the difference between a jew and a canoe?

canoes tip.
 
I don't know any corny jokes, only horrible ones...*ahem*

How do you kill a fox?
Cut off it's leg and make it run across Canada.

What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.
Hi I'm Richter Scale and Haiti 7.0 was my idea

Don't hate me.
 
two old ladies were outside smoking a cig, it started to rain, the first old lady said"shit now i have to put out my cigerrette" the secound old lady said "no you dont, i bought cigerrette covers..." she proceeded to pull out a condom and cut the tip off of one. The first old lady said "wow where do you get those?" the second old lady told her to go to the drug store and ask for a pack of condoms.
 
the next day the first old lady did just that, when the pharmisist asked what size condom, she replyed, "big enought cor a camel".

sorry for the dub post my computer freaked out
 
how many telemark skiers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

none, those dirty hippies cant pay the electric bill.

pt 2.

how many dirty hippies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

none, didrty hippies screw in Volkswagen vans.

what do you call a hot girl on the arm of a snowboarder?

a tattoo.

heard those from a guy in steamboat.
 
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