A pickup line that never fails...

Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?

another:

guy: "hey, feel my jacket."

*she feels the jacket*

girl: "ooh it's really nice"

guy: "yeah, it's boyfriend material."

HAH.
 
my mom told me to never look at pretty girls because i will turn into a statue! In fact i can feel myself getting hard right now!
 
The jaaaaaaag.

I'll nose press your box if you lip slide my rail.

never works.

Are you from Tennessee? Because I'd like to have sex with you.

never, ever works.

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I have a gun

Get in the van

How do I know we're going to have sex tonight? I'm stronger than you.

I forgot most of the really creepy ones, but if you want to get arrested, these are a good start lol.
 
want to see the back of my van, you wanna check out my video game collection, wanna check out my parents basement, i dont have a job so i can spend all my time with you(creepy voice)
 
Not a pickup line but I'm gonna marry a woman who works at subway so everytime I go into subway so I can yell MAKE ME A SANDWHICH Any discopotamus yer hilarious.
 
Pretty sure it would've worked on a homeless dude as well.

Your point is...?

attentionwhore.jpg
 
you: hey ladygirl:i have a bfyou: i have a gold fish named tomgirl:uhhh? :Syou:oh sorry i thought we were talking about things that dont matter

or you say
you have a math testher:uhh soyou: i thought we were talking abut things we could cheat on
 
you: do you know why you should masturbate with these fingers

*gesture to your index and middle*

her: no why?

you: because theyre mine
 
Kind of off topic but my girlfriend was wearing lipstick the other day. I said I thought it looked good. She said "yeah its the best one I've ever had. It stays on forever. This shit wont come off your dick for a week!".

Such a great one liner for a girl!
 
The word of the day is legs, lets go home and spread the word

or

There are 206 bones in the human body, want one more
 
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