The best gaper quotes

gaper dad to his daughter: "honey do a helicopter!" as her and her little brothers roll over the lip multiple times destroying it before the park crew finally fixes it. And the same family was impressed by my snowboarder friend's 180
 
about a month ago me and my friends were in the liftline with a go pro. the camera was up further with some of them, and me and my buddy are standing next to this couple. the guy turns to his girlfriend and says "see that thing on that kids pole? that's like an eleven thousand dollar camera?"I barely held in a laugh
 
so today me and my friends set up a lil rail in my town on this hill and this guy was walking on the street and ask me(skier) if i like skiing with one ski(referring to a snowboard or 2 skis. haha
 
so today me and my friends set up a lil rail in my town on this hill and this guy was walking on the street and ask me(skier) if i like skiing with one ski(referring to a snowboard or 2 skis. haha
 
so today me and my friends set up a lil rail in my town on this hill and this guy was walking on the street and ask me(skier) if i like skiing with one ski(referring to a snowboard or 2 skis. haha
 
I saw a little jappanese kid walking on the concrete path with his skis on i told him he'd wreck his skis but he kept them on. then the guy who owned the ski rental place cme out and freaked out on the kid then him and the kids dad got in a huge argument over whose right about what
 
today on the lift I got the usual "are those trick skis" and then the guy asked me how to do a jump of a mogul. I told him to just pop like he was jumping without skis. Next he asks me how to land. I can't help but say "gravity"
 
I was joking around about acting thug and shooting people on the lift after stomping tricks. and this guy with his kid next to my friend and I goes "dude, he's only SIX!"

dude, you're the one who barged onto the lift unwelcome with two kids in baggy pants and huge jackets. the fuck did you expect?
 
Friend :pulls a switch 3

Gaper Parents: Omg, he went off backwards, spun and landed backwards!

Me: Smiling, sag my pants a bit, and throw a switch 5.

Gaper: (At bottom of lift) go to my friend and ask how he does it...

Me: While on the lift, ask my friend why they didn't like my trick...

Because a switch 3 is harder than a switch 5, of course...
 
Depends how big the jump is haha. Switch 3 over small stuff is easy but over big stuff i cant do them nearly as well as a switch 5
 
group of 40 year old blokes on a cable car in Val disere to each other

" did you guys have a power wank before you came out? Ive never tried it before but gave it a go to see if it would affect my performance"

they then proceeded to talk about power wanking techniques.

Oblivious to the fact other people could speak english
 
gaper: (is sking through park) why are all those kids rewening the benches

gaper friend: i donno

me: those are boxes and if you sit on one il screw you over
 
One time, after jibbing i decided to grab something at subway, but i didn't have any shoes with me. So i just went in with my SPK's and a little girl in line behind me quietly asked her mom, "whats wrong that boys shoes?". Her mom responded with "They're his skateboarding boots, honey". My mind was full of what the fucks?
 
When ever I talk about park skiing with anybody at my school, for some demented reason they think I do aerials. So whenever I talk about my summer set-up the conversation usually goes around this:Them: "So you must practice you acrobatics on this"

Me: "That is exactly what I use it for."

Them: "Wait, so how do you do your maneuvers if theres a long pipe in front of your jump."

Me: " Oh thats to prevent other aerialists from using my ramp."

 
Gaper Mom-Wow these goggles are like wearing sunglasses in the summer. I can actually see what I am doing.
 
haha something similar happened to me last night.

Some girl asked if my jiberish al a mode was a star wars sweatshirt because of the font
 
I work front desk at pretty nice hotel and it's an amazing three day storm,

Gaper: Man it's really snowing out there.

Me: I know! should be some good skiing out there.

Gaper: Wait so people actually ski in this weather.

Me: ....Ah yes, actually they do sir.

Gaper: Well, when's it going to be sunny again?

halfpipe=trick ditch
 
not really a gaper quote but funny

but today i was skiing at a relatively crowded small hill and some guy comes up to my freind and say, dude tell your sister to unblock me on facebook, theres an awkward silence, and then the guy said oh wrong person super sorry, im not retarded or anything, well maybe a little. made me laugh pretty hard.
 
That's a pretty legitimate question. I find myself thinking that all the time while riding up the lift with park rats, and I would not consider myself a gaper by any means.
 
I tell in class to my teacher that i ski:

Teacher: Oh, so your following Hermann maier's foot steps. (famous slalom skier)

Me: No, i freestyle ski.

Teacher: O, you mean the moguls? that must be rough.

Me: No, its like same as snowboarding but with skis. You hit jumps and slide rails.

Friend in class who doesent ski: Yeah, you should see how crazy he is when he does backflips.

>.^
 
last year i was in the lodge so i put my goggle up on my forehead and some gaper comes up to me and asks "i see alot of people with those goggle things. should i invest in some?"
 
oh! another good one:i was riding the lift with a guy and his daughter and a kid throws a backie off of a jump and the daughter turns to her dad and says "do you think lindsey vohnn could do that?"
 
I've heard: 1. Why are you wearing a dress? 2. Why are both tips of your skiis turned up? 3. Why are there crates and metal bars in the jump run?
 
1) not a kid, kid

2) number of posts is not proportional to quality

3) give a shit about karma

4) my use of the word 'moron' was legitimate, and being offended/insulted is subjective

 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top