Most embarassing sex story

went to a house party a while back. My mate was shagging this bird on the kitchen table in the dark, they came down the next morning to find the parents cleaning up blood from the table.

Pretty rough eh
 
i was 3/4 passed out in a hotel jam 8 of us had, 2 rooms, me, bddy, and his gf in one room, they though t i was totally gone.. i heard it all but was too messed up to even roll over and say something
 
when i was 4 i was naked in a tent in my backyard with some chick. my older brother (10 at the time)had a bunch of friends over to play a game of manhunt. he went to hide in the tent, saw us, screamed, and then ran out and told my mom

she moved a year later, and i hadnt seen her for 9 years, then i saw her up at the hill last year and mann did she get FAT.

and you probably all think im joking, but i got miker92 and skii9151 to back me up.

 
k i was butt ass naked fuckin this girl in the passenger seat of my car and all my friends rolled up to party at the spot i was parked and they all knew it was me so a just jumped into the drivers seat and took off as fast as i could hahaha it was funny shit and they all still give me shit for it
 
me and my ex very pretty drunk, started doing it and it was some of the best sex ive ever had...then right before im about to finish i felt the need to puke. so i stopped, ran to the bathroom, puked mad jager and redbull up for like half n hour and then i was too sick to finish. needless to say she was pissed, i was pretty disappointed in myself and we broke up 2 months ago, and thank god for that.
 
this might turn into a good thread. i'd ask for it to get moved to ladies men or start a new one there. then it won't get deleted as fast
 
i was at my gf's house and she was giving me head, I was about done, then her sister just busts in the room out of no where, doesn't even knock, and I like oh shit then just jizzed all over my gf's face... needless to say, I don't talk to her sister very much any more.
 
this isnt mine... and im not sure if its true..... but one of my friends told me when he was little (like 8 i think) there was a chick who lived next door and they would play "doctor" in his yard and eventually they started playing "penis doctor"... pretty funny story

and for who it is, im not gonna say but if they wanna own up to their story, they'll recognize it when they see it on here
 
Me and my girl:

6259slothfornication2.JPG
 
I nailed an escort on Justin Senicals couch while we watched pootietang together,

The next day it was news around town, His roomate made me take the Blanket to a dry cleaners.
 
When people say escort all I can think of is like James Bond or something.

"Mr. Bond, your mission is to escort the governor to the party tonight. as you know he is a marked man so extreme caution is to exercised. We're counting on you."

im probably ceompletely insane though
 
Me and this busty girl, (me and my friends play hoggin points where whoever hooks up with the ugliest nasty girl wins the hoggin trophy), so this was to win the title i met her at a party and got her to go to the bathroom with me. she got on her knees and started to suck my dick when all of a sudden i began to vomit all over her and my dick. she wasnt wearing a shirt and it got all over her. She just started rubbing the vomit all over her body and finished the job. then i took a shower kicked the pig out of the bathroom and kept on partying
 
the best one is when my roommate got shitfaced and brought home the town bike, he comes in & trys to be subtle & smooth & stuff and get me out of bed & into the lounge so they can have some privacy.

anyway so im couch surfing & playing nintendo for an hour or so & he comes in (still totally paro) waving his dick around going "does this looks like aids? shit i think ive got aids or something" and he's freaking out cos she's a hoe & he went bareback.

what makes it tragic is his gf is sooooooo hot, like one of the hottest chicks in town but he gets the worst whiskey dick
 
i dont have one

but my girlfriend and her friends wrote stories one night after reading porn..it started off with me going back to school to grab my math book, then we had sex for 5and a half hours in one of the choir rooms.

i stole the story from her room and showed it to all my friends
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top