MILF is fb stalking me and hitting me up... How do I not blow this?

[Byron_tha_gr8]

This is the kind of golden opportunity id usually fuck up big time.

my younger friend's smoking hot single mom is liking a bunch of my old FB statuses and pics, and just texted me to see how i'm doing. There is a myth that a few people have hooked up with her, but I'm not sure.

She lives in my hometown in AZ, where ill be back to in about a month. How do I not blow it until then? And not my cum, its far too late for that.

Oh, and what the fuck would this be without pics.

friend on left, milf on right.

Bonus points, she drives a new STI and has sexy tats.

 

[.MASSHOLE.]

Pee in her butt.

 

[MothaHucker]

unagi

 

[Byron_tha_gr8]

so do i text her that or what

 

[Abu_Hajaar]

Op I bet shes really a 60 year old man

 

[7-11_Slurpee]

Come on, be a gentleman. Ask her if you may urinate inside of her anal sphincter

 

[2_fadez]

 

[Ski_the_east01]

Nice fuckin catch..guaranteed freak

Just don't act like a pussy, odds are those horned up milf is looking for anything to ride so it's not like you have to go out of your way to impress her

Start off the convo like this and you're guaranteed to get it in

 

[.AR6rider.]

 

[Byron_tha_gr8]

yeah i lied, shes ugly as fuck.

 

[.AR6rider.]

 

[Mag]

Better call nev

 

[Kooky_Lukey]

Watch How I Met Your Mother and write down all of Barney Stinson's rules and you should be good.

 

[SFB]

have sex with her son so she knows you are good at the sex. then she will want to take you down to pound town

 

[LoathesRaisins]

Mother Son Trio even.

 

[dela]

What the fuck why can't this shit happen to me

 

[seward]

just send her a dick pic you fuckin pussayyy

 

[snugs]

dick pick. just post in on your wall but tag her in it

 

[Phil-X-]

this

 

[Panda_with_Guns]

same way with any othr chick, just make sure your friend doesnt find out, so start out vaguely until you know she wanna do the horizontal have sex dance

 

[seward]

even better idea lol

 

[MNS]

"stalking"

 

[-RB-]

Dick pic is a deal breaker

 

[ZachAndCheese]

If you guys fuck make sure to snapchat your friend during the sex

 

[howlongcanausern]

holy shit OP posts pics IN THE OP...

ALL HAIL OP

 

[Charlie_Kelly]

Make her into chili and feed it to me.

 

[deleted5]

Strait up tell her you want to do dinner, woman that old know what they want and they don't want to play around.

 

[uyghur]

Threads

Keep us posted OP

 

[Garebear]

this shall be exciting

 

[DIPED_IN_SAUCE]

threads.

 

[Bloom.]

Use the D.E.N.N.I.S system - demonstrate value, engage physically, nurture dependence, neglect emotionally, inspire hope, & separate entirely

 

[Spagett+]

Yeah a teacher who was a lady complimented my hair last week so im basically in the same boat.

 

[gapersarefriends]

threads

 

[E__]

Yeah, you'll get one too but it's not driveable...

 

[jensen]

I tried using the google reverse image lookup and I couldn't find her. Damn.

 

[steeze.pizza]

Then I shall MAC- Move in After Completion

 

[jibbpeter]

sig'd

 

[Byron_tha_gr8]

worth it

 

[Byron_tha_gr8]

why would you feel the need to do that

 

[jensen]

So I could get you laid bro

 

[-MK-]

Lies...

 

[skiersupreme]

im not saying dont do it, because she is real hot. but prepare for the akwardness of knowing youve had sex with that kids mom

 

[Abu_Hajaar]

Last time I heard that one I laughed so hard I fell off my 4 year old

 

[cornholio]

sweet troll thread bro

 

[Xanadoo]

my advice:

 

[Xanadoo]

View attachment 701585

 

[Peter.]

just ask if you can get in dat ass

 

[Toasty.]

That was fucking stupid.

 

[Byron_tha_gr8]

good thing it was dub posted

 

[TheCastrator69]

MILFs of what age. Older girls are EASY to get with. WHY? Because they LOVE knowing that younger men still like them.

 

[KrazyistKarl]

Pee in her butt