I will not sleep sound, until...

lorida

lorida

Active member
All Volvo drivers are taken off of the road.

Over the 3 years I've been priveledged enough to own and drive a car, I've never been in an accident (knock on wood), never gotten a ticket, nothing.

Although, with 100 000 km's under my belt, I've concluded that 90% of Volvo drivers can't drive FOR SHIT. They believe that they own the road and that they're "hot stuff", because they drive an overpriced German car.

I've had 3 rediculously close calls to an accident, each one of them involving Volvo's.

Coincidence? I think not. Next time that there's a Volvo nearby, watch them. See how they react to situations, how they constantly talk on a cell phone or fidget with the radio, or even send emails or turn around to check on the kids. Most importantly, observe how they couldn't give a fuck if you're in the way, if they want to switch lanes.

Although I've only noticed this with Volvo's, have you seen such a relationship with high class import cars and there driving skills?

If you feel like reading a bit, continue. If not, share your comments.

Tonight, I had a prime example of another clueless Volvo driver.

After a dinner, movie, and stopping by a party with my girlfriend I was off to drive her home. We were on a 2 lane highway and were aproaching traffic. The right lane was jammed, but there was still 300 feet of open space in the left lane (my lane) so I gradually started to slow down from 80 Km/h.

About 80 feet infront of me a car starts VERY SLOWLY pulling out of the right lane, into my lane. Right away, I saw that it was a Volvo and knew I was fucked.

I'm now 60 feet away, travelling 65 Km/h. The driver of the Volvo finally notices my EXTREMELY bright Xenon Hid headlights coming towards her and decides to stop dead...occupying half of the left lane.

40 feet away. I hit the brakes as hard as I can, locking up all 4 wheels (ABS never works when it's supposed to).

30 Feet. My car is still travelling way too fast, probably 50 Km/h. The Volvo is motionless like a deer in headlights.

20 feet. My girlfriend braces herself, getting ready to crash. She turns her head away from the glass, preparing for impact.

10 feet. I realise that there's no stopping. I take the only out; the narrow passage between the wall on the left, and the Volvo.

Impact. I ever so lightly brush against the Volvo. I don't even feel it. The wall is so close to touching my mirror that...shit.

I manage to pull away from it all. The Volvo driver didn't even look at me, let alone apologize to myself or my girlfriend. Bitch.

Meh, more of a rant than anything.
 
You're missing on factor in your "volvo car theory" that you forgot the addition of the "human nature of females theory". You did not include the very important variable, the sex of the driver.

According to past experience and my current calculations of the equation:

[wd(bds)-b(given)]k=A

wd = woman driver

bds = bad driving situation

b = brain

k = Attention Deficit Disorder

A= Accident

comes out to saying that %100 you were hit by a driver of the female sex.
 
Volvos are Swedish, not German. But you have a point. I find this often goes for Mercedes and Saab drivers as well. Why would you buy a nice car that goes fast when you're just going to creep along at 30 mph and brake for hallucinations all the time? It is soooooo frustrating when you just want to get to the hill and one of these geriatrics/morons is blocking the road.
 
At least your car didn't skid sideways and crash into the Volvo like this...

car_crash_0199.jpg
 
exactly, sorry ladies but ive had numerous occasions where dumb bitches have done something wrong or just completely suck at driving
 
Women drivers piss me off. I'm not trying to sound like I'm calling them out but I swear everytime I'm in a parking lot theres a woman driver going down the WRONG way (theres a flow movement between lanes) so I have to reverse, and then go down the next one.
 
dont want to offend anyone here, but every time I've been in a near accident situation, a woman or a clearly immigrant fellow was responsible
 
they're swedish. if you're going to hate get your facts straight. i've had more sketchy experiences with people driving mercedes' or big SUV's. volvo drivers around here are pretty chill.
 
hahahah that was great.

the funniest thing is if you play with a woman in halo and they splatter somebody with like a ghost or something just tell em "godamnt women suck so much at driving you arent supposed to hit the pedestrians!!!"
 
I find drivers in Montreal to be sketchy in general (not saying you are). I see what your saying though.
 
Oh right, sorry. Since the car is made in Sweden, the story JUST changed dramatically...

But I did mention that all "highly" priced cars tend to be sketch.
 
I completely agree with the "bitches can't drive that good" theory. Race doesn't usually matter, unless the driver is asian. Also old people can't really drive well either.
 
On my 5 minute drive home today, I saw 2 cars stuck in snow. Both were Volvo's.

I got one of them stuck...but still!
 
that sucks man. volvos should have their own personal lane where they can fuck around in and then the rest of the world can be in piece
 
maybe its because volvos are supposedly the safest cars on the road so all volvo drivers just believe they have this aura of volvo security around them so they just act like complete douchebags on the road
 
bahaha fucking reatarded. ive had a close call with a ford once. im about to write a shitton bitching about it!!!! AHHHHHHHH. ur gay
 
i dont think it has anything to do with the car. my dad just inherited a volvo and hes not a bad driver. dont really agree with what u said but yes women have been known to be bad drivers. i guess women drive volvos?
 
I hate drivers who just don't pay attention to the conditons. we were on our way home from vt today with a few inches of snow on the ground and a lot more coming down and my dad was giving me tips on winter drving. (I wasn't driving though.) so we're waiing to make a left and our friends are right behind us also waiting. this car is coming down the road making a right from where we will be going and going to where we just came from. so my dad is like watch this car. and sure enough he comes around the turn too fast, brakes, and starts to skid, nearly hitting our friends stationary car. bitches..
 
I was driving an S80 today, thought I'd be able to make it through 2 feet of pow pow...Yeaa..nope.
 
Nobody said you had to read the thread.

Why don't you fuck off with your negative half literate posts, nay?

Thanks.
 
I agree with what you're saying to an extent, note how I wrote "I've concluded that 90% of Volvo drivers can't drive FOR SHIT".

That small 10% is for people like your father and mine.

My dad used to drive a Volvo but decided to sell it after 2 months, because "It's just...not my style, too showy for me". It also broke down repeatedly. Always something malfunctioning eletrically.

It's quite likely that I've only noticed this because I'm looking for it, ignoring the odd case of a decent, corteous Volvo driver.

Still though, Volvo's creep me out.

P.S. (not directed towards the guy I quoted)

Stop telling me it's a Swedish car! Point taken and understood! I've seen that post 4-5 times so far.

Imagine you're standing in a group of people and five people repeat the same thing...it's useless and makes you look stupid.
 
my parents both own volvo's and i love both of those cars. my only complaint is the lack of cupholders and the weirdness of where the buttons are placed
 
haha, i went off the road today too. i was drifting in the snow in my ml320 and lets 6 inches of snow is a lot slipperier than i am used to. luckily i had a shovel in my car because i was on my way home from hitting a hip we made out of a huge snowpile in a parking lot.
 
Really? I find it's the opposite. Because Volvo's have such a low re-sale value just about anyone can pick up a SWEDISH car for cheap.

There, Swedish Car. Swedish Swedish Swedish!
 
^sorry for excessive posts, but I just remembered something: Volvo used to ahve a factory in Halifax. My parents have this ancient 1970 volvo for parts for the equally old, but structurally sound robin's egg blue volvo. and the motor was made in halifax. and those old volvos are beasts.
 
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