I have a game for you guys to play



You have been banned for the following reason:
backsasserDate the ban will be lifted: 02-28-2011, 08:00 PM

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You have received an infraction at The Landover Baptist Church ForumsDear Wonderboy,

You have received an infraction at The Landover Baptist Church Forums.

Reason: Quarantine
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BOI?!?!?!?!?
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This infraction is worth 8000 point(s) and may result in restricted access until it expires. Serious infractions will never expire.

Original Post:
http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?p=299528
Quote:Quote:Originally Posted by Pastor Al E Pistle We call them out for JESUS. When they come out we slaughter them for JESUS. We are not hypocrites, JOOS and CATLICKS are.

LEARN TO SPELL, YOU QWEER!it Queer Dumb ass learn to spell, you need to shut your mouth boiAll the best,
The Landover Baptist Church Forums__________________
Emeritus Professor of the Christ Jesus Chair of Theology at Landover Baptist University
 
its a site made to mock churches. sort of like a gentle version of church of the flying spaghetti monster. The guy who made it is a serious atheist
 
ahhhhhh

Drew Peacock (say it fast)

You have been banned for the following reason:

I bet you can't even ski you fagot!

Date the ban will be lifted: Never

 
i just got banned cuz they said i was boring after 1 post. and have any of you read the thing about how skiing is banned cuz its linked to homos? i dont think there is 1 in the sport that i have ever met or heard of. wow
 
Dear thomas wallace,

You have received an infraction at The Landover Baptist Church Forums.

Reason: Failing to capitalize God and Lord

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Capitalizing God's name shows Him respect.

This is a Christian church forum, not LOLCATZ or 4chan.
angry.gif


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This infraction is worth 10 point(s) and may result in restricted

access until it expires. Serious infractions will never expire.
 
Amen brother. Why else did Suzy Chapstick need to keep her lips lubricated at all times?

The worst are the so-called "free-style" skiers. These are the

homosexuals who hang smoke dope and try to pass themselves of as real

skiers. Most of the people who call themselves free-style skiers have

never actually been on a pair of skis.

Pastor Billy-Reuben

 
What I want to know is, why do these obvious Sodomites feel the need to attach pieces of wood to their feet?

There is absolutely no mention in The Bible of Pilgrims coming down the Mountain with planks of wood firmly fixed to their feet.

Sandals were always good enough for Jesus and thet are certainly good enough for me.

These people are mocking Christians everywhere.

Jesus Weeps. hahahahahahah

im BLOODZKILLCRYPTS
 
this is a fake site isn't it? Someone posted this a while ago, its a bunch of kids who think its funny to lure people to their site so they can ban them....
 
they gave me an infraction because "if you can't post using proper American spelling, grammar and punctuation, then you'll get tossed out" thats retarded these guys are idiots
 
ha sorry repost but i just got banned.

You have been banned for the following reason:

midget demon

Date the ban will be lifted: Never

i have been banned because apparently i am a midget demon.

 
Random Question

Fill in the blank using your King James Bible: Lev 19:15 in righteousness shalt thou ______ thy neighbour.

well i am not having my king james bible at hand right now
 


Dear Open-Wide,

You have received an infraction at The Landover Baptist Church Forums.

Reason: Ban

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We can keep this up way longer than you ski homers kid.

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This infraction is worth 16000 point(s) and may result in restricted access until it expires. Serious infractions will never expire.

All the best,

The Landover Baptist Church Forums

haha love it!!
 
hahahah i just posted this thread. my name is vietnamveteran(no disrepsect to the real vets)

i posted in the easter section

It was Easter 1962 and I was lying sleepless in a foxhole half thinking

of my family back home and where the enemy was. I layed with my helmet

pulled down almost over my eyes with my m1-garand rifle locked and

loaded in my hands. I looked at my platoon and could barely see the

expressions on their faces behind the blood and mud. but it was easy to

tell what they were feeling. they felt fatigued angry and scared all at

the same time. we knew the enemy was watching us since we had been

pinned down by sniper and machine gun fire for the past two days. now

it was easter and the damn gooks couldnt gives us one piffleing moment

of peace. our seargent called over our platoon sniper who crawled

through the trench to his feet not 5 feet away from me. he was told he

had to take out the machine gunner and knock off the snipers that were

watching us. he reluctantly agreed and crawled back through thet trench

to where his mosin-nagant rifle lay picked it up. did a quick rundown

and crawled to the edge of the trench. we watch as he crossed his heart

and made a break for the woods. but as soon as he popped up his head

exploded into a mess of brains and blood...he had been picked off. his

body lay twitching and squirting blood as we lay watching. barely

affected by this disturbance...it wasnt the first time we had seen men

shot. we had watched men impaled with bayonets and hit with sniper

shots the endless pools of blood and dead bodies. at this point it only

fueled the reason we kept fighting. the seargent then looked at me and

told me to radio in an airstrike beacuse we were helpless without it. i

radioed it in and in under 5 minutes bombs drilled the hillside not a

quarter mile in front of us. as soon as the first bomb hit we charged

their machine gun nest bayonets equiped and guns blazing. the

machinegun was clearly destroyed but enemy infantry and snipers

remained. people around me were shot and mutulated but that couldnt

distract me. i leaped into the enemey foxhole and stabbed one of those

swamp rats in the neck with my bayonet. i wrenched it from his dead

skull and shot another in the chest. i ran over hit him in the head

with the butt of my rifle. a satisfying crunch of his skull told me he

was dead. it was all a blur from there. grenades bullets and all of

those screaming piffleing asians. the fight lasted 20 minutes we killed

a total of 40 of those damn piffleers. in the end we ended up taking

the ground.. a small victory but a good one. the only problem was the

snipers were still in the trees pinning us down. my seargent was hit in

the leg and wass crawling slowly toward the cover where we were. i ran

out grabbed him and pulled him back in.. but just as i was about to get

him in a sniper shot took off his head and i was plastered with blood

bone and brain.. my entire face and torso was covered. i just lay there

with a blank stare still looking at my friend and leader. i dropped him

and realized a sharp pain in my left arm. i got to cover and looks at

it. i had been shot... the shot was deep and i was oozing dark thick

blood from my wrist. the medic ran over and told me i had to amputate

it. so i took a machete out of one of the dead gooks and proceeded to

hack my own arm. that night we had no food and we were all hungry so we

used a flamethrower to cook my arm and we took turns taking bites of

the crispy flesh. after two days of not moving and eating only

deadbodies we got a call on the radio saying a chopper was going to

come to our rescue. we rejoiced and waited. when it got here we ran

out. i was the last one out of the hole and headed for the chopper.

when all of a sudden it exploded. killing all of my squadron and

leaving them in a bloody fiery mess. i ran for cover during the

confusion and just ran through the jungle towards the ocean which was 3

miles through enemy terrirtory. i made it to our base and was choppered

home to the states....i recieved 4 purple hearts and the medal of valor

and honor. thats how i spent easter...thank jesus im alive
 
my name is pokemon and i got this mail:

If you are a troll or are here to argue, be prepared to enjoy a very short visit on your way to SATAN's lair.

im not banned yet.....

 
they also have a contest for best deviled eggs, for easter and the winner gets:

"The winner will receive this gorgeous Easter bonnet from Betty's Sue's Bonnet Barn located in the Glory Hole Shoppette."

a mighty fine prize from the glory hole !
 
what the fuck?!? my username is cannibal tranny and i posted a thread call "i ate a crusifix" and it it just said vagina and i havent gottan banned
 
i made a new account and posted biggie smalls lyrics and a paragraph talking abuot how they were hipocritical assholes and i got banned for

You have been banned for the following reason:

Being an asshat

Date the ban will be lifted: 03-02-2011, 03:00 PM

 
Im surprised I long I have made it. I have had about 9 warnings or so...

Im the most successful and not losing this game!

Im GayIsTheWord
 
It only took me 1 post. Here what pastor Al E Pistle said to me

"Your mom is a catlick who is going to hell. You are just a bumpkin. Please enroll in Columbine high school."

Too bad the shootings already happened, or else I would
 
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