How to quit your job with style.

"good idea, just hope your friends pull through. i'd hate to imagine u tryin to pull the flying V by yourself. remember, it worked in Mighty Ducks, but that was just a movie. and they also had Emilio Estevez, i mean cmon."

and " just start beatboxin on the intercom it would be so funny. then push the gum rack over on the floor, tackle somebody and burst outta there

hahahahahaha

but yeah you better do it, and make it fucking epic

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prolly like 120, me and bob white (linesnowblades) hit it once and the same time and went so big out blades fell off!!!!!!! We were like shit our blades just fell off, thats not supposed to happen!!!! What a day.
 
if you get fiered, you get payed for like 2 weeks after... so if i were you i'd catch a decisious bass, and then gut it on your bosses desk leaving a note saying you did it, that or do it infront of him.

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-Last Element Freeskiing

-'Hitler was a smart man. He came up with more ways to cook a Jew than George Foreman did to cook a piece of meat.'-Skiierman
 
over the intercom, at a really busy time, say were sorry for the inconvenience folks, but a trace of anthrax was found in our latest pastries. that shit would get around quick, in the papers and everything, then your boss, owner would have to go through all of that trouble to cover his ass. and on the way out, pull the fire alarm. people would be runnin all over

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If i lived in a perfect world, i would spend my days skiing in the sun, the party never ends in perfect world. Nacho cheese and anarchy, boy that sure sounds good to
 
AS OF TODAY, THIS IS WHAT WENT DOWN

today the main manager pulled me aside and said 'what is this talk i hear of you trying to get a mutiny together'. i guess enough word got around of our revolution that he heard about it. i said to him 'look man. i am the go-to man. with the snap of my fingers 11 courtesy clerks will be gone and your company will be crippled. i am also the not-to-go man, and with the snap of my fingers you will still have 11 happy employees. here is what you will do: you will promote me to a GM (stock person) the day that i turn 18. I will get all the time off i desire, on the days that i desire, until that time. You will forget about all these bullshit ruls for box people. Also, breaks will go from being 10 minutes, to 30 minutes.' He lauged in my face and said that nobody would follow me, and that the actual plan would not go through. He dared me to even try it. I am figuring that maybe half will actually carry out the plan. still, 6 will fuck up the store, since they can't afford to lose that many people. the remaining courtesy clerks shifts would go from 20 to 40 hours a week. it would be insane for a little while. in the meantime they would frantically be hiring anyone that applied. wednesday is the day, my children. oh yes.

 
nobodies ever seen half baked?? find a bincha ppl that work there that you dont like and be like "fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you," point at some random old lady and say "your cool, fuck you, im out"

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Clickity clank, clickity clank, the money goes into my piggy bank
 
hah my bad didnt take the time to read it

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Clickity clank, clickity clank, the money goes into my piggy bank
 
Dude if no one else walks out with you, you're FUCKED...good luck

Bahahaha... or, you could call it the 'elitist snob' cult. Anyways, my family already owns a country club, so no thanks.

J.D. May
 
dude this is great! we were called "front end" clerks at the grocery store i worked at and i had to do all that crap you talked about as well (it blew)..i would have walked... Another good thing to do is steal as many carts as possible! how are people gonna shop without carts?

*NS Skateboarders Cult*
 
just remember that everyone can be replaced.

if your still doing it, leave your hat there and storm back in and say "i forgot my hat!"

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when you walk out drop your pants and let your ass hang out, preferably walk from the office in the back or something all the way to the door like that. and it would be even funnier if noone went through with it and u still acted like a hard ass

 
have a bleach fight. we used to do that at my job.

________________

I wanna walk all over you.
 
haha, bitch, which Hannaford? i work at the one in concord, although i did it the smart way, i became a cashier, so much better than being a service clerk. haha, it depends on who you work with too. i worked a lot of night shifts with some cool girls, so we just goofed off. i guess it helps i have enough of a work ethic people actually like me.

-Joe
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Official NS marketing consultant

Help me get a free ipod please!?!?!http://www.freeiPods.com/?r=9734247
 
I used to work at a grocery store. When I quit, I went and got all this nasty raw meet and stuck it behind cereal boxes, bags of chips, boxes of flour, etc. I put so much of it in remote spots, it probably took days before they found it all. It smelled like shit too.

To love the times we have
To like what makes us sad
To live when others die
To lose and say goodbye
To last until our moment comes
 
just pull the half baked thing

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high north session 3

VIVA LA RESISTANCE

Jesus loves you, but i think your an asshat
 
Bring in one of those hotass chicks that work with you and go into the office to quit with her. Than proceed to having full out sex on his desk. When you about to blow your load pull out and cum all over his face, than tackle him to the ground and rub it in like lotion.

Be quick.

Join the homework sharing cult today!
 
^hahahahaha

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prolly like 120, me and bob white (linesnowblades) hit it once and the same time and went so big out blades fell off!!!!!!! We were like shit our blades just fell off, thats not supposed to happen!!!! What a day.
 
be really quick

To understand mankind, we must first understand the word. We can break the word down into two sub-words, 'mank' and 'ind'.What these two words mean is a mystery, just like mankind itself.
 
ya u still neva told us

pretend you will give the guy head to give back your skis, he probably will accept, then once he whipps his cock out, steal it-SteezePatro

if you want to be a real gangster wear your ski boots to the dance. when he starts shit when youre
 
ok.. so yah you totally wouldnt get paid for that because the bookie probally cheks it everynight. I know they do at my store and i as well work at a grocery store. Secondly. a flying V?

come on.. thats soo lame...

If anything... Quit straight up over the intercom... and get everyone else to do that..

I actually quit on the intercom at wendys... When i used to work there.. My manager cryed.

*****Capital city Ridaz***** est 2003

 
UPDATE

the plan did not go down as expected. people are pussies, myself included. i decided that i was going to wait to quit until i found another job, because i have insurance, gas, and a truck to pay for. so i finally got another job, and TOMORROW 4/21 is the day i am going to quit. i am going to go in there at 8:00 tomorrow night when only one of the managers is working. the one i hate the most.

i was thinking of walking in there and be like. you are a little fucking prick. i fucking quit. some simple shit like that. anyone else have any ideas? help me out asap.

 
get fuckin pumped on some nigga beats, fuckin jump on his desk, double gainer into his lap with your raging boner hanging out...then slap him in the face with your wang, followed by a delicious bass wrapped in seaweed filled with period blood

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If it aint Gorilla, it aint Steeze

i'm not even trying to be mean...but, you look borderline retarded -freerider_klo
 
why dont u glue some chopsticks to his nose and then SPIT!!! yes i said SPIT....thatd be soo harsh..omg i would never think about spitting..ooo im scared

Jeepers Creepers, where'd you get the neat sneakers?!?!

hehehe giggle giggle giggle

 
throw an egg at him

then wen he says ur fired

u say u cant fire me i quit

then throw 2 more eggs

pretend you will give the guy head to give back your skis, he probably will accept, then once he whipps his cock out, steal it-SteezePatro

if you want to be a real gangster wear your ski boots to the dance. when he starts shit when youre
 
pretend you will give the guy head to give back your skis, he probably will accept, then once he whipps his cock out, steal it

~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~

If it aint Gorilla, it aint Steeze

i'm not even trying to be mean...but, you look borderline retarded -freerider_klo
 
hey how about some realistic shit? something with skis is out. this is so cal. nobody knows that skis even exist. i live in the fucking desert haha.

 
trust me the eggs wont fail

pretend you will give the guy head to give back your skis, he probably will accept, then once he whipps his cock out, steal it-SteezePatro

if you want to be a real gangster wear your ski boots to the dance. when he starts shit when youre
 
KEEP IN MIND THERE ARE INTERCOMS THAT CAN BE HEARD THROUGHOUT THE STORE.

i don't want to cuss since you can actually get in trouble for that. but i was thinking of saying something like

ATTENTION STATER BROTHERS SHOPPPPPERS! stater brothers is overpriced, and the people here do not like you. please go to ralphs, albertsons, vons, or costco. thank you, have a nice day.

 
not a bad idea

also get him to yell at u or say sumting bad (while the intercome is secritly on)

pretend you will give the guy head to give back your skis, he probably will accept, then once he whipps his cock out, steal it-SteezePatrol

if you want to be a real gangster wear your ski boots to the dance. when he starts shit
 
I dont want to ruin the fun cuz it is a fun idea, but a bunch of workers at my grocery store where i worked tried it 4 years ago while i was a cashier. 15 kids walked in and quit with out putting in there 2 weeks. They even clocked in and left like your plan.

All that happened was our managers laughed let them leave, walked over to the counter and cancelled their clock ins for the day being they didnt work. Then they asked us cashiers and other stockers and shit to fill in while they hire more. It was sweet cuz i got a shit load of over time!! Not to mention the kids and u cant use it as a job reference unless u want to look stupid.

All Im sayin is be careful cuz the GM actually was laughing at the kids as they left they felt so stupid funniest thing ever 2 kids actually asked for their job back!!!I it doesnt affect the store at all and it just helps other workers get some extra cash!! But if u hate it that much ok!!

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Skiing isn't a matte rof life and death. IT's much more important than that!

'Live simply so others can simply live'-Ghandi
 
dang, this thing is sooo funny. too bad it didnt work out how you planned.

'If she floats than she is not

A witch like we had thought'

'Like most babies smell like butter

his smell smelled like no other'

'She'll come back as fire, to burn all the liars,

And leave a blanket of ash on the ground.
 
it won't work, your schedule is written down elsewhere, your manager will take note of all you quitting that day. consult the person who is in charge of payroll and then proced to fuck you up the ass.

trust i work at a grocery store too. i know how it works. i even have a card to swipe in aswell, and sometimes when i leave i don't swipe out. then they just check your real hours on the sheet and adjust it to that.

but funny ways to quit? well i work in the deli, but i havn't quit i just went on leave of absence for university, but before i left me and one of my deli friends cut thick slabs of bloody angus beef, and stuck it in file folders where all the old time sheets are kept, pretty much every drawer we shoved a peice of meat in there. so when that bloody meat begins to rot its gonna fucking stink harrrrsh.

hahahahahaha

 
get the biggest fish in the seafood section, walk into his office, slap him in the face, and challenge him to a duel. and if he refuses tell him you fucking quit and he sucks at life.

-CCR-

"listen trebec, ive lost five years of my life trying to invent an anal bum cover, failing to do so remains as my greatest regret."

--sean connery
 
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