Best Chair Lift Insult

"hey where'd you get that?"

probably been posted already but idgaf , its hilarious because everyone assumes you are talking to them and nobody knows what youre talking about. following it up with "yeah that!" adds confusion
 
Pretty much when some thugbum guy is sitting on the chair next to me with his music blasting I pretend to rap along to it but only with the words nigga and weed sack
 
I used to think it was really funny to yell "loook out!! asphalt!!!" from the lift when I saw people awkwardly jumping off of things... I don't really know what I was going for there though. and no one else seemed to think it was that funny. so now I just sit peacefully or sing 'roll out' to myself.
 
when i see park rats afterbanging in place or ollieing in the lift line or like doing presses in weird places i always ask if they are pros. pretty much any time i can tell someone is doing something to look cool i ask if they are sponsored. I try to sound really sincere to get the best reaction
 
i scream at people

"HEY!! HEY YOU! YEAH! YOU! RIGHT THERE! HEY!"

then when they look at you all like

"me!?"

i go

"NNNOOOTTTTTT YOOOOUUUUUU!!!!"

also instead of talking about being sponsored by big name companies and shit, i lie to people on the lift and tell them i ride for, like, the shitty grocery store chain in town or the gas station up the street.

"yeah at first riding for shur fine was kinda weird cause, like, i dont get any gear, but i get all the fish sticks and domestic beer i want!"

also if someone starts to insult/pick a fight with you, (this goes for your local hill or anywhere really) i always throw out insults/talk shit in ways that dont really make any logical sense.

ill be like

"YOURE NOT REALLY AS CUTE AS I THINK YOU ARE BITCH!!"

or

"IVE FUCKED GUYS HALF YOUR SIZE FAGGOT!"

sometimes i just flash my dick off the chair IDK.
 
there are a bunch of snowboarders who yell do a front flip every time they see skiers in the park, so when they yell it at me i do front flips. fuck them
 
It's hilarious just to creep the fuck out of people. Like if someone is talking shit, just yell back "Hey! I'll give you the worst blowjob of your life!"
 
You guys are way to direct. You have to wait until they're in front of you in the lift line, turn to your friends, and talk shit and laugh about them just loud enough for them to hear, while pretending like you're trying to whisper because they're in front of you. It gets people so pissed off haha.
 
what you say to a more portly racer chick in a gs suitpoint at her stomache and yell "yeah, they're called sit ups"

 
That's the point... They look at u like wtf also yelling I hate snowboarders in the line or lodge gets u more than a few dirty looks
 
If you are pretty good at rails and can 270 on and shit you can do this.. When you first get into the park just scoot up to a rail and like tap your ski on it or pizza all the way onto a box and act like you dont know anything bout park, ha my friend even shouted out to a group of kids once, " hey is this one of those feature rail thingys" but then once they think your bad, play em in a game of SKATE or beat for money and actually try then just show eveyone up and blow em out of the water. kids will be like Dafuq
 
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