The Life of Symms

did anyone else think they seemed like hardasses? haha

LOL.

"why do we have to skate to this shitty classical music"...hahaha isn't that the truth...My hockey team used to have shoot the duck contest and if you fell you had to skate your ass off till the last person fell...good times and even better article

i feel so dumb for not getting it at first, damnit!

this guys are bad ass

@ J.D.

The comments are better than the article haha

symms again taking the prize for easiest kick in the balls. a satire insinuates intelligence and subtlety, this lacks both. yawn. - jack.whelan

My sympathies entirely. As a satire it's clumsy at best, although Symms does take all the easy shots to mock thug ski culture (as if that were difficult to do). He appears to suggest that energy drink marketing strategies are luring skiers away from the Olympics. Problem is, last I checked, none of the skiers we're so wittily making fun of here even have the chance to compete in the Olympics yet, and I'm betting that their sponsors ("Energy Drink Company" included) would be very happy to see them there. In order for this to work as a satire for skiing, we would actually need to see skiers voluntarily opting out of Olympic competition to make movies.

Maybe I just missed the press release that said halfpipe skiing has been accepted as an Olympic discipline, but all the skiers sponsored by "Energy Drink Company" are declining to compete.

waste of a story?

strange....

This just made my bad day better. Great discussion and great to see a skier contributing to the industry and doing something with his life besides giving up an education to be rad.

very nice article. for those who got the metaphor

Well done Symms. I feel pretty bad though, as I was reading Biggie came on in my headphones.

My least favorite "pro-skier' in the industry

John Symms is my hero, dark_skinned, you must be a snowboarder sneakin around on NS..we'll get you

He isn't a pro, his friend is a pro

Just kidding, Symm's u r cool and a a pro

This makes me lol

when your skates are this hot, the ice ain't the only thing that gets moist, know what I mean?

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

i almost defecated myself after reading that one! (seriously)

haha symms with yet another great metaphor

A more realistically thugged out figure skater picture would go a long way to making the article funnier. The dialogue is a bit over the top, but the premise itself is hilarious.