Your Wierdest Stories

AntifreezeSteeze

AntifreezeSteeze

Active member
anything thats mad awk or whatever, lets see what you got. I'll start it off.

So the night was young and the sun was setting in Jersey and a bunch of my friends and I were cutting through a guys yard to get back to my house when a guy comes out with a .22 and shot off a couple shots into the sky yelling so we pick up the pace a knotch and there was this wall with a 4 foot drop after down this little hill and we all had to jump it. since we were trying to get out of there with our lives we ran straight at this 3 foot wall and when i tried to jump my left foot got caught and flipped me, and it was just my luck i landed on my feet on the other side. i was pretty much the man
 
I have a lot

one time my best friend broke up with his g/f because she didnt even kiss him ever

and walked in on her and I making outh that night

umm i yelled penis in a all school mass and everyone looked at me for the whole thing

i told pete wentz to fuck off one and got kicked out of the venue

 
i was at a funeral earlier today and during the prayer at the cemetary this old guy in front of me farted it was so funny.... it would have been a whole lot funnier if it wasnt at a funeral..... my cousins were on the other side of the crowd and they heard it to....
 
Way back like 6 years ago when i was about 11, my friend and i are walking on the sidewalk in his neighborhood, and this girl maybe 2 years or so younger is walking towards us. when she gets close my friend pretends to hock up some phlegm and acts like hes going to spit on her. She moves away and tries to spit at him and misses, and he spits right back at her, but they never hit each other and she just ran away. It happened over like maybe 8 seconds, it was so fucking random and happened so spontaneously. i was just like what the fuck.
 
so last fall right after halloween my friends thought it would be fun to drive around in my buddys pickup and steal pumpkins off peoples porches and then go somewhere and smash them all. So we go to this neighborhood with a big hill and a school with a big park at the bottom and drive to the top we get out and my friend puts his truck in neutral and starts rolling it down the hill as we throw pumpkins in the back. However, he doesn't realize that since the truck is off he has to pump the break to get it to work and the truck starts to take off down the hill and hes yelling and stuff. As I'm watching this go down on someones front doorstep the door busts open and theres a guy standing there with a fireplace poker and hes like "drop the pumpkin ***hole" I was so stunned I almost pissed myself and in a moment of panic smashed the pumpkin right there on his doorstep and now this guy is equally stunned and is like, "what the ****" so before he can do anything I start booking it down the street to the pickup which is now stopped several houses down I hop in the back and my friends are laughing hysterically b/c they saw the whole thing and now the guy is running towards the truck so we drive off and decide just to go get baked
 
My friend lives near the local Mall and it is directly behind his house.... However you have to cut through this farm owned by a crazy farmer named Farmer Claytis and he is always fucking out there. Take note that this place is huge and ontop of a huge hill its like a meadow and you can see neighboring cities. So we are sneaking thrugh the tall grass and we are about 500 yards away from the end of the meadow into the thick woods to the mall. We pop our heads up becuase we were going stealth to avoid being seen ... no farmer claytis in sight so then we go out in the open and god behold farmer claytis is riding his fucking tractor. He stops the tractor. YALL GOD DANM KIDS BEH TRUSSPASSEN ON MEH FARM ALL GAD DAMN TIme. reaches into the tractor pulls out wat seemed to be a 12 gauge shotgun and starts chasing us. We started off sprinthing for the 500 yard dash to the woods. claytis being old and decrepit didnt follow the chase. still to this day we cut through
 
one time when i was probally 14, i was at my friends house crusing in his neighbor hood on our boards, and on the side of the road we found a bowling ball. so we rolled it down this hill as soon a we let it go a car came up so we booked it, never found out what happened, i hope it didnt hitthe car though, i would feel bad.
 
once i saw this old guy lean over to spit on the ground and he spat all over his shoulder
 
me and my friends were playing the penis game in rite aid in the candy aisle and the manager found us and said"do you want to say that on the loudspeaker"? and my friend said yes. we ran. haha we were in like 5th grade
 
ah.... ic thanxs for clearifying.... several things flashed through my mind when i read that.....
 
hmm heres one that comes to mind.

i was at work last year in a movie store in town. a lady comes in just before close and is walking around. im doing my normal closing routines, cleaning ect. suddenly she is gone. i assume that she left and i never heard the buzzer. so i take all the money (im alone, by the way) and i go downstairs to our creepy ass basement and count it and put it away.

the next day i come back to work, and find out that we were robbed the night before. the lady hid in the basement, with me down there, and then when i left she came up and stole the money.

but she got caught. still creepy as shit though.
 
haha whole family standing around the dining room table like 30 40 people littles kids old people everything... we were all holding hands and shit saying grace and cousins whose hand i was holding no homo lifted up our hands and slammed me in the balls. it was helarious and really akward cuz now im going to hell
 
i was working once (at a grocery store) and this lady comes in wearing what first appeared to be a trench coat and she shopped for about an hour and when she came up to the check out lane we found that it was a cape and under neath was nothing but her underwear and she was a older and bigger lady. so after we got done with her order she wanted to drive up to get it so we made a unsuspecting new kid do it
 
I was thinking about that story the other day, i wondered where or who i heard it from, clears that up. Creepy as hell
 
my friend and i went to montreal and swam at that olymipcs pool area, where he had to take a huge dump. he ran into the bathroom and sat on the toilet seat, where some canadian thought it would be funny to shit on.
 
last summer at klondike days ( sorta like the annual carnival with rides and whatnot) i was with my friends ross and brady and we were just at the park outsiide of the grounds passin around a j. we decided that we wanted to go walk around before we went in for some reason i dont know why . from a distance ross pointed out to be what he thought was a naked person sitting on a hill. so we walked over real quick to get a peek..

this bitch must have been trippin balls or something .. she was just looking around and into the sky with her legs spread out, revealing a jungle of tangled pubics

we decided we didnt wanna disturb this ugly ass monster chick so we headed to the grounds and went on some fun rides! yay!

 
My family pulled out of an alley and a kid ran into the side of our van at about mach 10. He was ok, and it went alittle like this.

flash_video_placeholder.png
 
ive got a good one, but its fucking weird

alright so this is my friends friend. so a few years back, he's in a band playing at a concert. he sees a wicked hot girl in the crowd, so naturally, he goes to talk to her. now shes totally flirting with him and they hook up for a while. so she gives him her number and says she will call him. a week or so later, she calls him and tells him her parents are out of town and he should come over. so he gets there and they immediately started hooking up. they go upstairs into her room and are about to have sex. before they do, she says "put these anal beads on and tell me when your about to cum." so they have sex and she rips his anal beads out and he shits everywhere. so he runs into the bathroom to clean himself up, and when he gets back she's rolling in his shit yelling "fuck me! fuck me!" he runs outta the house, never talks to her again.
 
me and a friend were playing the nigger game on a chairlift, and there was a black guy on the chairlift with us, we didnt notice till he spoke up and was like "umm u kids wanna shut the fuck up"
 
i got hit by a moped while riding by bike on the vineyard and i wasn't even injured but the guy got really fucked up
 
your the man. ill give you karma too.

i woke up naked on the roof of the elementary school one night...

the next night i was naked on the playground at 2:30 in the morning... good times
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top