You know your in college when...

you put room numbers in your phone instead of last names

someone says hi and you have no idea how they know you

you meet people at parties that you have class with and you had no idea

Mad Dog 20/20 nuff said

the university of toledo.
 
drinking at 8 am is acceptable, nothing cures a hangover better

a hook up where you just get a blowjob is a bad hookup

you consume more beer than any other liquid on a daily basis
 
When smoking a bowl at home becomes frustrating because you realize you can't just light up in bed and you might actually have to sneak out of the house

UVM
 
When you are completely unbothered by the fact that someone stole the wall between the stall and the urinals of your coed bathroom.When the "more rigorous cleaning standards" introduced because of swine flu still involve leaving the soap dispenser empty for a weekWhen you can get a limo to multiple clubs in town with just a phone call (midweek)
When your snack of choice is peanut butter from the jar because that is the only food left in your room.When all of the couches get stolen from your floor at least once every weekend, but have miraculously reappeared by Monday
 
when you wake up to go puke at 7am and you see a naked girl whom you've never met or seen before.

when you have to go to the shower with sandals on

when you are drunk for at least 3 days of the week and where being drunk more than 5 days a week isnt alcoholism

 
When you have to drag your passed out suitemate out of the shower in the morning so you can shower and go to class.
 
when your too broke to do laundry so you realize boxers are good for two days in a row, inside then flip them inside out.
 
...you come home around 5h30 in the morning, then wake up the next day, be in class by 10, come back home around 18h, look into the mirror and see that theres a ridiculously awesome moustache drawn on your face !
 
...when you decide to go naked to your bathroom down the hall with nothing but your viking helmet on because you cant find any pants....
 
two days. is that it?!? i wear them they go on floor, then the next time i wear them is when i forget when i last wore them. no washing required.
that rule is void though with the pair that i pissed myself in last week, the girl didn't even notice.
this post was catalysed by last night, what a quality night last night was!!!
ps. freshers i'm so jealous of you.
 
When the trashcan in a shared kitchen is full, (ie nothing more can physically be balanced ontop of the trash already inside) the floor next to the trashcan becomes a perfectly acceptable spot to discard of pizza boxes/beer cans/whatever.

It is a good idea to get so drunk before leaving your house to go out to a bar/club that you don't remember any of your night out after leaving your front door. Its cheaper that way.

No matter how many times you say you'll make it to your 9:00am classes regardless of how hungover you are, you know deep down that you never, ever will.

With the slightest hint of sunshine, even if it is January and barely above freezing, there is always some dickhead who thinks it's cool to take his top off to walk around campus.

I went to uni in the UK, but I imagine the experience is pretty similar regardless!
 
...you wake up at 3am to the sound of your friend peeing on your door blackout drunk and proceed to throw him into a wall and get pissed on.
...you decide to teepee a house drunk on mischief night, see a car going by the house you are vandalizing, dive into the bushes, and then fall asleep for 2 hours
...when you are at a halloween party and see a fat naked girl painted as a cat, like an SI swimsuit model
...the yankees win the world series and a phillies fan throws his 40inch flat screen out his 3 story window
...you take a shit in a bag of cheese puffs and leave it on your friends bed because you're bored

 
when on the night before halloween you get so drunk from pregaming that you don't make it any farther than the toliet in the bathroom across the hall... still wearing your sombrero, ponch, and fake mustache and puking and then passing out for a few hours.

when you feel totally comfortable bumming a lighter off someone to spark up your joint on your walk between classes.

when you roll a joint in the board of regents meeting room and leave a rolling paper on the front desk that says "roll me" on it.

when you wake up and there are 2 condoms on the ground... you fucked the only girl that was in the room that night and threw your condom in the garbage... so the two condoms must have came from the other 3 guys who crashed in your room that night. you then never speak to said girl again. (epic first night of college.)

when you laugh at your next door neighbor when he says he went to de-tox last night.

When your college pre-game activities blow even the most epic highschool party.

when you figure out a way to hang a hammock between you and your roomates bed.

when you break 12 shot glasses in the first couple months of school.

when it's more than okay to stumble home drunk.
 
... you stand up at 6 because the stores close at 7

--------------

... one student says to the other: dude you know how late it is? .

..wednesday...

no,no, summer or winter semester?
 
when you cant ski because you have finals. college is such bullshit. i could see it being fun if you were studying film or something that doesnt require shitloads of studying
 
...When you have to suck the liquor store guy's dick just to get a 6pack of some cheap shit because you've spent all your money on on philipino hookers
 
this used to be my life.... then i started to have to do ALOT of work to pass, now i have no life
 
when your first thought after a test is "i hope i beat the average"

when you get a 37% on a test and people call you a curve killer
 
Ha truth.-when spending 12 hrs a day at the library during dead week is normal.-driving 1000 miles to an away football game with 3 other guys in a civic coupe because you had nothing better to do that weekend.-you spend hundreds of dollars a term on text books that you only touch twice, once picking it off the shelf in the bookstore, and once returning it.-you get more excited about halloween than you did when you were 10
 
...the mini fridge your parents got you because you said youd use it for food has only ever contained beer, cold pizza or a really random object such as a jacket cause you cant be bothered to put it in it's proper place

...scholarships that your parents didnt know about go towards buying beer and skis

im in UBC engineering

also to all you people in arts that skip, in engineering you will fail if you dont go to class and you still might if you do. some of the posts above just dont apply at all to me.
 
you wake up with a bloody left nipple, sleeping naked inside a blacklit jeep, crackpipe smoldering on the dash, blood on your tires, shotgun shells everywhere, and a dead hooker in the passengers seat
 
You do 40 hours of home work a week and are still behind........ oh i forgot that not everyone is in nano electric engineering

my bad
 
....when you have seen the guy in the room next to you, having a terrible smell coming from his room and thinking theres a good chance he might of died in there from the past weekend ...
 
You know you're in college when...

you used to hate naps, but now need them to survive.

you have seen someone violated with a green Sharpie in every way possible and then pissed on.

a 5 page paper doesn't seem bad at all.

kids are doing power hours in your lectures.

Lehigh University
 
...when you've switched from a trash basket to an actual trashcan because it won't leak when you barf into it.
...when you smell everything before drinking/eating it.
... when you listen to music for 2 reasons: 1) because you like it 2) so you don't have to listen to your neighbour wanking/fucking...
... when bananas are breakfast, lunch, and dinner...
...same goes for frozen pizzas...
... you can open a bottle of beer with literally ANYTHING in your room...
... you realize that not going to a lesson is better than going drunk/hung over to a lesson...
... when you have good shoes and party shoes...
... when you spray deodorant in your trashcan to hide the smell because you're still waiting for someone else to take it out....
... when you no longer lock your bike, you just take a new one every time....
...when you know how to get into your room/dorm without a key (you had to learn the hard way)
... when you can't remember your friends being sober...
... when you have to learn 800+ pages you think: meh, could be worst.....
etc etc....
 
Yep.

-When you don't bother dressing up for class like you did in high school (for girls at least)

-When you wear clothes that haven't been washed in awhile

-When stealing food and beer has become socially accepted behavior
 
...when quality toilet paper becomes gold...no matter how hard you try, someone will always get in on your blunt...everything gets broken and stolen, keep your shit put away...prison food
 
-When no amount of alarm clocks will get you up in the morning -When you walk into lecture, where you sit is based on the hotness of the girl you're sitting beside. -When you start to like beer because it's cheap. -When late night walks to a fast food joint in a drunken stupor is a weekend ritual.
 
the entire campus riots after a red sox championship

you adopt the saying "sleep is overrated"...yet you sleep in class all the time

people with expensive beer instantly become your best friend for the night

shower beers are completely normal

 
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