Vancouver Theory-3/Poorboyz premiere (reminder)

schmuck

schmuck

Active member
Unacceptable reasons for not coming to the Vancouver Theory-3/Poorboyz premiere of Safety Meeting & WAR this Friday night @ 6pm at UBC in the main ballroom of the Student Union Building, followed by a turbo-rad afterparty right downstairs at the Pit (since the beer gardens were cancelled). Compiled by Jeff Schmuck & Dan Hedekar while putting off making signs for ski poles and looking for missing binding screws at Comor.

-I have to work/I cant get work off.

-I live in Whistler/Vernon/Penticton/USA.

-I live too far away.

-I have no way of getting there.

-My car is broken/might break down.

-I’m getting surgery.

-I’m sick.

-I’m tired.

-I’m broke.

-I’m a bitch.

-Nobody likes me.

-I’m not allowed to pull fire alarms.

-My syphillis flared up again.

-There’s going to be way too many people in the theatre for me to jerk off without getting caught.

-I’m in jail.

-I don’t drink.

-I drink, but I don’t want to be hungover for the snow show.

-Zach Davison gave me STD’s and I don’t want to face him.

-Justin Dorey got me pregnant and I don’t want to face him.

-Matt Margetts is just too damn sexy and I don’t want to face him.

-Nicole Pendleberry broke my heart by going out with Jeffy and I don’t want to face her.

-I’m gay, and Jeff Thomas isn’t, which really really sucks cuz I want to be with him but I cant…so I don’t want to face him.

-I’m in a ski/snowboard club.

-I have homework.

-I hate Simon/I hate Josh (haha, sorry boys, had to do it).

-It’s my girlfriend’s best friend’s birthday.

-My girlfriend/boyfriend doesn’t want to go.

-My ex-girlfriend/ex-boyfriend is going to be there.

-My wife/girlfriend is giving birth.

-I actually don’t watch ski movies to enjoy them. I watch them strictly to over analyze everything that’s wrong with the video, the riders and the film company itself, and then log onto this website as soon as it’s over and bitch about it.

-I don’t ski.

-I’m a snowboarder.

-worse yet, I’m a ski racer.

-I’ve already seen Safety Meeting and/or War 10,000,000,000 times.

-I have a different premiere to go to.

-I got abducted by aliens.

-I’ve got a date with a hot transvestite.

-I’m more of an MSP fan actually.

-I don’t want to hook up with a hot, easy, first year UBC girl.

-I don’t want to watch two rad ski movies, get drunk and have a good time with friends and win free stuff.

-I’m scared of Jeff Schmuck and/or Dan Hedekar.

see everyone there.

 
That's what I like to hear.

If hot, easy, first year UBC girls aren't available, will snotty, bitchy, hard to get to third/fourth year girls be made available instead?
 
The explanation for that is that the UBC ski and board club is useless... but we all knew that. The Pit it shall be.
 
would it be wrong to be a slobbering drunk wandering around UBC at 3 in the afternoon yelling at strangers demanding the movie starts earlier?
 
The beer gardens were cancllled because unfortunately the club lost the licqour license. Dont fret!...I promise the pit will be alchoholic...and beer isnt much more its like 3 bucks for a pint they told me for the party. Shots are about 350-375...pitchers will be cheap. Tons of free shit and funny contests on the dance floor....and come one guys...random cute young underage, experimental UBC girls for you creepy bastards to watch on the dance floor in little clothing. Also will be playing the vids on the big screens and tvs, for you guys to analyze or get stoked on do more shots.

CYHA THERE!
 
No. It would be wrong to NOT be a slobbering drunk wandering around UBC at 3pm yelling at strangers demanding that the movies start earlier.

Damn comor for losing their "it's ok to drink in the shop, we've got insurance for it" insurance policy. Welp, back to drinking on the bus for me!
 
i'm homeless... no, that won't do.

but i really might not be able to make it. it all depends on this old retired dude from nelson named andy who's currently hung over and playing golf in the rain. (seriously).
 
There is something going on in a field somewhere nearby I heard... some engineering deal... 3 bucks to get in and 1$ beers. But I think it ends at 10. So that might not be all that useful, unless you want to dash in there, down 10 beer, and get outta there.
 
Are you kidding me? no seriously.... are you?

I'm effing driving up the island to nanaimo, catching a ferry to horseshoe bay, catching a ferry to bowen island, chilling there for a few hrs, catching a ferry BACK to the mainland to go to the premiere, leaving the premiere at 8:45pm to catch a ferry BACK to bowen, then sat morning ferrying from bowen to horseshoe, then horseshoe to nanaimo, then driving back down to Victoria. That is the plan minus perhaps 2 bowen ferry rides depending how early I head up on fri.

YOU HAVE NO FUCKING EXCUSE. hahahhahah
 
the ballroom is often the site of beer gardens so... that was all i was saying there.

but those hollywood bastards packed up and left, im disappointed.
 
The engineers are having a beer garden in McKinnes field 6-10... kinda bad timing.

There is also the Big Lebowski beer garden put on by the film soc at 7pm (don't know where).

I'm coming in from Langley...
 
so the old dude was crazy...

...i'm guessing he fell asleep at the wheel last night and died... so, i'm commin'. it sucks though, the last bus to get home is at 12:20 from metrotown, so that means i gotta leave ubc by like 10:30, i hate burnaby. thank god I only live here two months of the year.

why don't the bus's run till last call?
 
-I’m broke.

Schmuck, Adam just told me this one today that he wont be drinking hhhahahha he is serious though
 
im going to drink til there are no buses and just wing it from there... whcih should prove to be fun... or painful, well see.
 
yea, and the closest night bus to my place goes down the kingsway to surrey... so it's an hour walk from the night bus to my house...
 
I'm 16 and don't even have my L yet, let alone a vehicle. But once I get my truck in november and my N, steezepatrol and I will be at everything.
 
I often have to walk the 3 km from where the nightbus stops to my house drunk off my ass. I have this "colour between the lines" strategy... just keep your eyes on the edges of the sidewalk and try to stay between them and don't stop walking. If you can avoid the telephone poles too, that's a bonus.
 
Just did up some of the stuff to give out etc....

20 something shirts, some hoodies, lots of hats, 3 goggles, 3 sunglasses, 3 sets of poles, few flats of shark energy drink, some smaller prizes, and some other stuff I cant remeber now.
 
could I persuade you to send me a t-shirt by any chance. If I was able to get over there I would but seeing that I cant can I have a prize.
 
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