Told my coworker a chemistry joke today

A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much a drink is. the bartender says, "for you no charge."

I wish I had a good Chemistry joke but all the good ones Argon.
 
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don't worry bro, I saw it. I got you buddy. Come here, hug me. That's right, you can cry. Don't be ashamed, you're like super awesome. Just nobody can see it yet. Sure you'll get a girlfriend one day, I hear chicks talking about you the whole time. They're like "oh yeah, that guy he's the one... OMG IS THAT FERRIS BUELLER??! Sorry, what were you saying?"

Whoa. The fuck happened there
 
Two men walk into a bar. One asks the bartender "Hey, Ill have a glass of H2O". The second agrees and says "Ill have a glass of H2O too". The second man died.
 
You should all really care about atoms, they matter. All these chemistry pun jokes are Boron me to death.
 
My chem instructer is very disorganized, his desk is a tower of papers. I suggested to him an electrophile to store his documents digitally.
 
id tell you it, but its none of your bismuth

Sodium and flourine were walking down the street and they accidentally bumped into each other. At that very moment Sodium said woah hold on, i think ive lost an electron.

flourine said are you sure?

and Sodium said yeah, im positive.

whats can you make out of an avagadro? guacaMOLE

i have way more for later
 
What do you get when you put sodium chloride and a Duracell in the same room? A salt and battery!

What do we do with chemists when they die? We BARIUM!

A photon walks into a hotel with his luggage. The bellhop asks, "Do you want me to take those sir?" The photon replies, "thats ok I'm traveling light!"

 
Why are Sulfur, Tungsten, and Silver the coolest elements around?

Cuz they got so much SWAg

GIRL ARE YOU MADE OF COPPER AND TELLURIUM BECAUSE YOU ARE CuTe
 
What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium and phosphorus walked in to the bar?

OH SNaP
 
wana hear a joke about nitric oxide.......NO

Do you have any Sodium Hydrobromite?..........NaBrO

Oxygen and Magnesium get together.........oMg

i blew my chemistry experiment up today..... oxidants happen

Does anyone think these chemistry jokes..........are getting a bit Boron

and last one this is a good one for any girls that know chemistry you can say to:

Girl you must have 11 protons because you are sodium hot
 
Why did the hamburger have less energy than the steak?

the hamburger is in it GROUND state!!!!

DId you hear about the guy who made it to absolute zero?

He was 0K!

 
because chemists dont use schrodingers equation?

I wanted to sit in the chair but my body wasnt in the right confirmation.
 
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