To kill a cat...

teneighty_skier22

teneighty_skier22

Active member
Alright!!! Let us get creative again! Let's see how many different ways we can come up with to kill a cat! Be sure to number your's...here we go.

1. Throw off cliff after lighting it on fire. The throw just may put out the flame, so the cat will think 'phew, that was close' then *BAM* he hits the ground...

This post was brought to you by me, Jeff Meeker.

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Dave Likes Kittens.

Undercover skier, and nuclear technician of the Silent Army!

::Viva La Ressistance::
 
take an air compressor and shove the nozzle up its ass, and hold hte trigger down, itll blow up so ive heard

ProudEST Member of the Hobum Posse

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As a famous person once said 'I like to ski'

-Famous Person

I want to be a Ski Bum that lives in a tent on the mountains when I'm older.

'You fight with spork. You ride house cat'

-Very amusing calulator game called HicQuest
 
you forgot to number it you fucking dildo... hehe. anywho

3. shove a spikey dildo in its ass and make the come back outta the mouth, nuff said

`=`=`=`=`=`=`=`=`

Sam

'i used to have a little but now i have a lot

im still im still wiener from the block' - wiener

VIVA LA RESISTANCE
 
awww... we already did this... i listed like 15 of them.. owell here we go again...

4. car battery acid as eyedrops

5. multiple shards of glass through one ear out the other

6. drowned in oil

7. slit eyelids in dip in vinigar

8. pet it with meat cleaver

9. bite paws off and glue them over nostrils

10. smother in grenades

11. archery target practice

12. doberman and cat game

13. cut off eyelids and dose eyes in chlorine

14. feed it needles

15. baseball bat, flamethrower(need say more?)

16. 360 mute onto it

17. spork in liver

18. wrap pole through intestines

19. over exposed to radiation followed by dull knife

20. ever slingshotted a cat against a wall at 100mph?

i fall a lot, and im cool
 
*I know, caden, but some power abusing mod deleted it, TWICE*

This post was brought to you by me, Jeff Meeker.

____________________________________________________________

Dave Likes Kittens.

Undercover skier, and nuclear technician of the Silent Army!

::Viva La Ressistance::
 
hahaha, i remember this thread

21. shove explosives up kitty

22. drop kitty out of car on a road going very fast

23. hit kitty with car

24. kitty as baseball

25. huck kitty off a big ass cliff with no snow

26. blowling ball kitty

27. golf practice at a driving range, and kitty is the golf ball

28. microwave

29. oven

30. bbq

-Grant

*Fuck El Niño*
 
31. while on a heli trip, drop cat from one heli onto another ones rotor

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Alex

Screw Moseley!

Guerilla Trooper of the Silent Army

::Viva la Resistance!::
 
godkillssmall.jpg


haha beat u so it supilot, biatch

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Alex

Screw Moseley!

Guerilla Trooper of the Silent Army

::Viva la Resistance!::
 
BWAHAHAHHA.

Tie rope around each paw. then tie to 4 cars and drive each in a separite direction.

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skiing is just another way to please yourself without the mess.

 
I am so very tired and it's making this post fucking hilarious... i can't stop laughing and i don't know why it's funny... in any case...

32. bury cat up to neck in lawn... mow lawn.

33. sparkler bomb, placed at makers discretion in/on cat

34. run cat over with cat, for added effect, use winch cat or pipe dragon.

35. breed cat sell more cats to army, dress like saddam or osama, use as target practice.

strap cat to 15' sub... play xzibit.

i'm trying to hard, this isn't funny.

 
37. Microwave

This post was brought to you by me, Jeff Meeker.

____________________________________________________________

Dave Likes Kittens.

Undercover skier, and nuclear technician of the Silent Army!

::Viva La Ressistance::
 
HAHA... # 32 was gold.

38. Feed through a tree shredder on slow speed... tail first.

39. Exacto knife... bucket of salt.

40. Put it on a hook and use it for musky bait.

42. Tie a rope around it's neck, the other end to a ceiling fan so that it's barely standing... Turn on fan.

 
43. put it in a blender ass first so you can the expressions it makes

44.skin it and pour peroxide on it

45. put it in a garbage bag and then duct tape the end to the muffler of your car

46.get a bunch of little kittens,put them in a garbage bag,drop a heavy enough object in it but make sure it lands on them,pour bleach in the bag so it burns the wounds from the object landing on them,tie the bag up and throw in a river

 
44. Drill hole through head.

45. Feed to starving, rabees infected doberman

46. Feed to starving, rabees infected Lesbian

48. Drown in tarter sauce.

49. Instead of water, feed it ammonia

50. Twist head off

51. Step on with golfing shoes

Hoked on foniks wurked fur me. kant u tel?

 
52. Drown in toilet

53. Caught in furnace

Now, i know these kill kats, because thats how my 2 cats died. i kid you not, it was pretty brutal. but yeah... i didnt try to kill the cat... it was an accident... i swear ;)

 
ya, i didnt read hte instructions ,i did it wrong

ProudEST Member of the Hobum Posse

----------------------------------------

As a famous person once said 'I like to ski'

-Famous Person

I want to be a Ski Bum that lives in a tent on the mountains when I'm older.

'You fight with spork. You ride house cat'

-Very amusing calulator game called HicQuest
 
54. Glue mouth shut and beat it to death

55. Hire an International Hitman to assasin cat

56. roll up in giant cigarette and smoke to death

57. Shuve spatula up ass and out of mouth

Hoked on foniks wurked fur me. kant u tel?

 
58. Get granny's shotgun out

America, we love you as the child loves the father who sits slobbering in his corner eating flies and spiders.
 
some of my friends actually used to drive around at night and abduct cats and bring them an isolated area,douse them with gas,set them on fire and watch them run around the bush,itd be hilarious just to be lookin out your window and see a flaming cat run by,but its still cruel

 
yea cat abduction is a serious no no

-----------------

Alex

Screw Moseley!

Guerilla Trooper of the Silent Army

::Viva la Resistance!::
 
get this song: stephen lynch - kill a kitten

be prepared to laugh your ass off

'now, turning if for when stuff gets in the way'-Shane McConkey
 
i didnt actually kill them,i know people who did,theyd even put firecrackers up their ass,they had found a cat and were gonna burn it then one of the guys realized it was my cat,fuck i would of brought them down

 
now ill admit that sticking fire crackers in orifices offers a little laugh(if its not u with it up in there), but fire crackers shouldnt b used to kill ne thing but gi joes

-----------------

Alex

Screw Moseley!

Guerilla Trooper of the Silent Army

::Viva la Resistance!::
 
Lateralis... ur friends r pretty fucked up. talkin about killin cats is different from actually killin cats. tell ur friends to go to hell

Hoked on foniks wurked fur me. kant u tel?

 
give it to dave pauls to take care of. it'll die in a day..

'um. yeah um. uh..woah' -me talking to mike 2 nights ago.
 
theyre all gone away for school and plus this was some years ago,maybe 3,so the cats had time to repopulate with their incest ways

 
59. sit on it

60. wate until it farts and put a match up to its ass

70.put it infront of a shuttle

John- God forgives,

MOUNTANS DON'T
 
61. Stab with icicle

62. Throw from top of Empire State Building

63. Shove cat up ass and suffocate it.

64. give to gay uncle bob. he'll know wat to do with it...

Hoked on foniks wurked fur me. kant u tel?

 
65. Feed to my dog

66. Feed to my brother

67. Shove straw down throat and suck up intestines and other organs

Hoked on foniks wurked fur me. kant u tel?

 
68. toast it to a light brown waffer and eat.

69. butchers knife in cat food :)

70. tiem machine-world war 2-japan

71. cut open stomach and burn its eyes with stomach acid

72. tie tail to pole, break neck, grab vid camera

73. give it to a retard

74. strap to lightning rod

75. place on ron jeremy's chest in ANY movie

76. throw a bed on one of its legs and go to sleep

77. use magic like harry potter

78. draw a mouse on a wood chipper

79. circus cat- as it jumps to catch ball, shoot in eardrum

80. 80 other starving cats

i fall a lot, and im cool
 
81) Go to the grocery store, get some fava beans, and a nice chanti...

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A scholar's ink lasts longer than a martyrs blood - Irish proverb

''One should respect public opinion insofar as is necessary to avoid starvation and keep out of prison, but anything that goes beyond this is voluntary submission to an unnecessary tyranny.''

-Bertrand Russel

 
82. axe

83. chainsaw

84. big knife

85. tie to railraod track, wait for train...

86. bury alive

87. rack it

88. drown it

89. cover it in wet cement

-Grant

*Fuck El Niño*
 
90. drown in piss

91. Drown in Puke

92. Papercut cat until it dies of loss of blood

Hoked on foniks wurked fur me. kant u tel?

 
93. Shove a tube down its throat and pour boiling water or sulfuric acid down it.

94. Put the cat in a giant frying pan with fenced in sides....heat frying pan...

95.Wrap it in tape so that it forms a ball and shove it down a potatoe gun...Then shoot the cat at a school bus.

96. Shove it in a freezer over nite.

97. Feed it magic mushrooms (or other drugs) until it kills itself.

98. Take it to a Pantera concert.

99. Cut off its feet and chase it with a chainsaw.

----now i lay me down to sleep, blah blah blah my soul to keep, if i die before i wake ill go to hell for heavens sake
 
100. Rip out its intestines and hang the cat with 'em.

I had to give that one.

----now i lay me down to sleep, blah blah blah my soul to keep, if i die before i wake ill go to hell for heavens sake
 
103. Cut into thick fillet mignion pieces, pour some sauce( preferably bbq sauce) onto cat. Grab knife and fork and enjoy...

Hoked on foniks wurked fur me. kant u tel?

 
104. Tie it's legs and arms to 4 poles and cover it in birdseed....Watch as those birds eat all its flesh off ...kind of ironic

----now i lay me down to sleep, blah blah blah my soul to keep, if i die before i wake ill go to hell for heavens sake
 
105. Give cat overdose of speed and watch as it literally jumps out of skin

hoked on foniks wurked fur me. kant u tel?

 
What's wrong with cats? I have a cat; it's pretty cool.

'i'm not too bright sometimes, when i turn my mind off school'

Nolan, after I reminded him of what a verb in the past tense was.

What do I know...I'm Drunk

 
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