This Joke Deserves It's Own Thread

JFerg

JFerg

Active member
A man walks into a XXX shop and asks the sales clerk to show him the blow-up dolls. Ths clerk takes the man over to the wall and begins explaining, "Well first we have the white doll, she is blonde, blue eyed, and tight as hell." The man nods his head and the clerk continues, "Next is our black doll, she's been selling really well, we've had great feedback." The customer is still not sold on any of the dolls, so the clerk goes on, "Our best seller is our Iraqi doll, because when you take her house, she blows herself up."
 
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA NO, worst joke ever.
 
What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies?

I don't have a ferrari in my garage:)
 
what the hell? thats not even a joke. A joke should make people laugh, not blush for you in front of their computer screens
 
how do you make a dead babie float?

Take your foot off it's head

What's pnk and floats?

a dead babie

what's green and floats?

the same babie 2 weeks later
 
whats funnier than a poile of dead babies

a pile of dead babies next to a baby with down syndrome

what do you get when you run over a stroller full of babies

an erection
 
How do you get a pile of dead babies into a small bucket?

A Blender

How do you get them out of the bucket?

Chips and dip anyone?
 
What did the sick kid get for Christmas?

CANCER!

One kid at christmas says "Haha I got more presents" then the other says "haha I don't have cancer!"
 
I think he meant that when you take her "home" she blows herself up. Not when you take her house. rofllollerzzzzz
 
ninaa called me a gayhead

omfg i love her sooooooooo much and she called me something

omgomgomg ninaa youre the best!

go nina go

omg she talked to me
 
I get it. I didnt really laugh tho. I was expectiong something better. And did the guy take the Iraqi doll? Or one of the other two?
 
so it's nighttime and a pedophile helping a kid get from one side of town to the other by walking through the wooded park. It's a dark and windy night, lights are out. the boy speaks up "hey mister, It's dark, i'm getting really scared".. the pedophile replies - "You're scared ?! I'm the one that has to walk back alone"
 
aand

wats worse than watching a puppy chase his tail?

watching a paraplegic chasing his dreams

right i'm off to hell
 
A woman with no arms or legs is sitting on a bench by a lake. She says to a man walking by if he will hug her, because she's never been hugged before. The guy says OK and hugs her. Then she asks him to kiss her, because she's never been kissed before. The guy says OK and kisses her. THEN she asks him to fuck her, because she's never been fucked before. The guy says OK, picks her up, and throws her in the lake and says "There, now your fucked."
 
there is a guy with a fake eye made out of wood, he is at a dance and he sees a girl with a hairy lip and he asks here to dance she says "would I,would" he replys with hair lip hair lip
 
Two Middle East mothers are sitting in the cafe chatting over a pint of goat's milk. The older of the mothers pulls her bag out and starts flipping through pictures and they start reminiscing.

"This is my oldest son Mohammed. He's 24 years old."

"Yes, I remember him as a baby" says the other mother cheerfully.

"He's a martyr now though" mum confides.

"Oh, so sad dear" says the other.

"And this is my second son, Kalid. He's 21"

"Oh, I remember him," says the other happily, "he had such curly hair when he was born".

"He's a martyr too" says mum quietly.

"Oh gracious me ... " says the other.

"And this is my third son. My baby. My beautiful Ahmed. He's 18", she whispers.

"Yes" says the friend enthusiastically, "I remember when he first started school".

"He's a martyr also," says mum, with tears in her eyes.

After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks wistfully at the photographs and says...

"They blow up so fast, don't they?"
 
So George Bush dies, and like all politicians, goes to hell.

So he arrives and Satan says, "geez, we're really full here.. I tell you what, There's some people that haven't done the bad things that you've done, so you'll have to trade with one of them. But, you get to choose what you'll be doing for eternity by kicking another person out and taking their place"

"Okay, not like I have a choice", he replies.

So, in he opens the first door and sees Ronald Regan.. he's trying to get on a horse, but whenever he does he falls off. "That's what you'll be doing for eternity".. "That looks hard, I think i'll try again", Bush states.

Behind the second door he sees Nixon, and nixon has a sludge hammer and is hammering rocks for eternity "Well, I've never liked physical labour, I think I'll pass again"

the Devil opens the thrid door and sees Clinton lying naked getting a blowjob from Monica Lewinsky. Bush in astonishment looks at the devil and says "that doesn't look slike a bad way to be for eternity"

The devil smiles and says "Okay, Monica, you're free to go"
 
HAHAH rotttten. i havnt heard that one..

whats funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree?

a dead baby nailed to ten trees.

what sounds does a baby make when you put it in the blender?

i dont know, i was too busy masterbating.
 
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