timmi
Active member
now before i start. i would just like to say that you will read this post. and you will like it. and you willread my signature at the end. proceed.
ok. as my 1000 post(well, 1003). i have decided to state some theories i have about this site we all love so much.
my first theory:
the post count to ability level theory.
the number of posts you have on this forum relates directly to your ability on the hill. for example: mattman. it is a proven fact that he is the best skier on this site, because of his incredibly high post count.
the scale goes as fallows.
over 15000= like the jesus of skis. women hanging of balls...so on and so on...
over 10000= incredible skiers. just not quite good enough to be called jesus
over 7000 = jaw dropping skiers.
over 5000 = intence skiers.
over 2000 = skiers that just kinda catch your eye as they are hitting a jump
over 1000 = still can do most tricks, not with the most style, or "steeze" but still very good skiers. (the level i am at)
over 500= mute grabs, japan airs, small rails.
over 200= can get down every hill, but still, is afraid of those scarey lumps of snow in the "jump park"
under 200= your average weekend worrior, spending the whole day on his ass in the bunny hill, and if they have goggles on, there is a big enough goggle gap for a small mexican family to live in.
that concludes my post count to ability theory. so the next time you see a guy jump his skis from mountain peak to mountain peak, you say, hey whats up mattman.
Theory number 2:
the post count to body state theory.
1-200 posts = young child.
201-500 posts= young spoiled bitch on a 24 hour sugar buzz.
501-700 posts = your internet-balls have just dropped. you are confused, but later realize that it is not a tiny punching bag.
701-1000= "theres hair where there was no hair before"
1001-2000= you start to notice thos pretty little things you once thought had cutties.
2001-3000= your firt kiss. AWWWWW!
3001-4000= you lost your virginity behind a out of buisness 7/11 to a girl named henrey.
4001-5000= you fall in love with henrey
5001-6000= you get married. it was beautiful, trust me.
6001-7000= your first little skier.
7001-8000= you are broke as hell because the little bastard needed those god damn 4frnts.
8001+ you start to age. your memory goes. but keep in mind. from my first theory, you are still an exceptonal skier.
ok. that is my 1003 post. i hope you have learned something from this. and if you have less posts then me. i know look down apon you.
this seems kind of entertaining in my head. so if you dont find it very good, then please, go easy on me.
ok. as my 1000 post(well, 1003). i have decided to state some theories i have about this site we all love so much.
my first theory:
the post count to ability level theory.
the number of posts you have on this forum relates directly to your ability on the hill. for example: mattman. it is a proven fact that he is the best skier on this site, because of his incredibly high post count.
the scale goes as fallows.
over 15000= like the jesus of skis. women hanging of balls...so on and so on...
over 10000= incredible skiers. just not quite good enough to be called jesus
over 7000 = jaw dropping skiers.
over 5000 = intence skiers.
over 2000 = skiers that just kinda catch your eye as they are hitting a jump
over 1000 = still can do most tricks, not with the most style, or "steeze" but still very good skiers. (the level i am at)
over 500= mute grabs, japan airs, small rails.
over 200= can get down every hill, but still, is afraid of those scarey lumps of snow in the "jump park"
under 200= your average weekend worrior, spending the whole day on his ass in the bunny hill, and if they have goggles on, there is a big enough goggle gap for a small mexican family to live in.
that concludes my post count to ability theory. so the next time you see a guy jump his skis from mountain peak to mountain peak, you say, hey whats up mattman.
Theory number 2:
the post count to body state theory.
1-200 posts = young child.
201-500 posts= young spoiled bitch on a 24 hour sugar buzz.
501-700 posts = your internet-balls have just dropped. you are confused, but later realize that it is not a tiny punching bag.
701-1000= "theres hair where there was no hair before"
1001-2000= you start to notice thos pretty little things you once thought had cutties.
2001-3000= your firt kiss. AWWWWW!
3001-4000= you lost your virginity behind a out of buisness 7/11 to a girl named henrey.
4001-5000= you fall in love with henrey
5001-6000= you get married. it was beautiful, trust me.
6001-7000= your first little skier.
7001-8000= you are broke as hell because the little bastard needed those god damn 4frnts.
8001+ you start to age. your memory goes. but keep in mind. from my first theory, you are still an exceptonal skier.
ok. that is my 1003 post. i hope you have learned something from this. and if you have less posts then me. i know look down apon you.
this seems kind of entertaining in my head. so if you dont find it very good, then please, go easy on me.
