BigPurpleSkiSuit
Active member
14347891:skierman said:
someone do the bumpity bump on that thread, I like it
The Onion - NS Version
- Thread starter tri_photo
- Start date
someone do the bumpity bump on that thread, I like it
MiIfHunter
Active member
14362120:BigPurpleSkiSuit said:
?
BigPurpleSkiSuit
Active member
14362130:MiIfHunter said:
''David Lesh to appear on Judge Judy after finding yet another way to illegally use a motor vehicle''
SWRTOFFICIAL
Active member
14347914:CrunnchyVanMan said:
this didn't age well
_IRRELEVANT_
Member
I should start cooking some of these up Again now that I can probably write something halfway decent after my first few
SmokedGouda
Active member
”Candide Thovex at age 39, Pulled a Muscle While Doing a Cork. People Believed His Career Was Over Until Candide Kamera 2.0”
**This post was edited on Jan 3rd 2022 at 10:41:34pm
**This post was edited on Jan 3rd 2022 at 10:41:34pm
Cody Townsend retires from the fifty project.
Says his legs are a little tired and backcountry skiing is hard.
Says his legs are a little tired and backcountry skiing is hard.
STEEZUS_CHRI5T
Active member
“NewSchoolers Gets Bought by Tick-Tock, Minor Dip Expected In Site Culture”
**This post was edited on Jan 15th 2022 at 11:05:26pm
**This post was edited on Jan 15th 2022 at 11:05:26pm
SmokedGouda
Active member
“Man has a heart attack while straightlining startire at keystone. Wipes out. Pass pulled indefinitely”
ReturnToMonkey
Active member
Vail Resorts ex-CEO steps down, regretting terrain park reductions after seeing video of Phil Casabon grab blunt
STEEZUS_CHRI5T
Active member
“Simon Dumont Doesn’t Talk About Himself on His Podcast. Listeners Outraged”
GayWolf420
Active member
"ski resort manager can't figure out if COVID has something to do with no one showing up to work or if the job just sucks. More at 10."
SmokedGouda
Active member
“The Onion Hires [tag=137890]@tri_photo[/tag] , Realizes Their Entire Sports Section is Now Devoted to Freeride and Swerve Skiing”
GrandThings
Active member
14393610:mrk127 said:
Her Dad died a year ago and she's been dedicating her contest performances to his memory. Gunna go out on a limb and say it has to do something with that.
Logi
Member
"Eileen Gu Quits Big Air, Starts Wearing Jeans and Smoking Cigs After Stomping A Lip On Blind 2"
by Todd Walnuts
The former professional freeskier, Eileen Gu Ailing, has decided to quit all future competition events, including X Games, the Olympics, and the Dew Tour. This decision comes in the wake of her recent trip to the terrain park at Elm Creek, Minnesota, and seeing several members of Zootspace and Jetskis wearing denim and chain-smoking Marlboros. "Their style is infectious," Gu said in an interview with ESPN. "Before, I cared about medals, 2160s, and representing China. Now I just care about getting as many head injuries as possible before my brain stops developing at 25." Gu, who formerly adhered to a strict training regimen from her coaches and doctors, has started sleeping until noon, eating copious amounts of fruit with Ankilla, and lapping the terrain park with a ciggy in her mouth, stomping lip on blind 2s, front swaps, and boned out switch straight airs. When our reporter asked what was next for the gold medalist, she replied, "Detuning my entire ski, buying Drop Kick 60's, and sleeping in my Corolla at Elm Creek. Wu-Tang is for the children. Ar ar ar!"
This is a work of fiction. Any similarity to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events, is purely coincidental.
by Todd Walnuts
The former professional freeskier, Eileen Gu Ailing, has decided to quit all future competition events, including X Games, the Olympics, and the Dew Tour. This decision comes in the wake of her recent trip to the terrain park at Elm Creek, Minnesota, and seeing several members of Zootspace and Jetskis wearing denim and chain-smoking Marlboros. "Their style is infectious," Gu said in an interview with ESPN. "Before, I cared about medals, 2160s, and representing China. Now I just care about getting as many head injuries as possible before my brain stops developing at 25." Gu, who formerly adhered to a strict training regimen from her coaches and doctors, has started sleeping until noon, eating copious amounts of fruit with Ankilla, and lapping the terrain park with a ciggy in her mouth, stomping lip on blind 2s, front swaps, and boned out switch straight airs. When our reporter asked what was next for the gold medalist, she replied, "Detuning my entire ski, buying Drop Kick 60's, and sleeping in my Corolla at Elm Creek. Wu-Tang is for the children. Ar ar ar!"
This is a work of fiction. Any similarity to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events, is purely coincidental.