The OFFICIAL post a quote or line of Chappelles Show

TylerS

TylerS

Active member
Mine Include

"Hey yo...Shut da Fuck up"

"Hayyyyy Motherrrfuckerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!"

Little Girl" My dad says if you follow through with your dreams and work hard thy will come true!"

Trash Can Monster" Thats da gayest shit i ever heard"

 
In the past few weeks, Clayton Bigsby accepted the fact that he is a black man. And three days ago, he filed for divorce from his wife. When we asked why after 19 years of marriage? He responded, Because she's a nigger lover
 
There are so many amemdments/to the constitution of the united states/which one will i pick? FIF!!!

White people like wayne brady, because he make bryan gumble, look like malcom X.
 
*IS WAYNE BRADY GONNA HAVE TO CHOKE A BITCH? YOU BETTER THANK DAVE CHAPPELLE

thanks dave, i love your show.

cop: my mother in law is never gonna believe this!

wayne: THATS BECAUSE SHES NEVER GONNA KNOW BITCH *kills cop*

you hungry dave? you want a sandwich. Eat your sandwich dave. Give me your sandwich.
 
nigger what the fuck is juice

i want sum grape drink bitch its purple mmm.

you know what son your a little bitch...who the fuck is nick cannon ( the three daves)

get it together grouch...its like bitch i live in a fucking trash can, im the poorest motherfucker in seceme street
 
"Hey Hey Hey... smoke weed every day."

"You know how cat food tastes? Just like it smells... DELICIOUS!"

"Let me tell you something you probably didn't know about me... *scratching neck* I smoke rocks."
 
Wayne Brady: Smoke this it will make you feel better Dave.

Dave: Naw i i cant.

Wayne: This is not an option nigger. If you do not smoke this we have a problem.

"RIVERSIDE MOFUCKERSS"
 
"is this the 5 o'clock free crack give away?"

"Im rick james bitch , show me them tittes"

"Fuck Nick cannon"

dave: aight how much for the hair cut?

Barber : 11 thousand dollars

dave:the sign says 8 $

Barber : thats the old price *shows Gun*
 
"-Some trick ass muck stepped on my sneakers. He poured Mortons salt all over em! Lets fuck em up at their own Bar-B-Q!!"
 
its kids like who you sit alone in lunch..

"this is the most ballin shit EVA!"

"SIKE! YOU'VE JUST BEEN ZAPPED!!"

"Spam bustas bitch!"

 
"I want you to go to the bronx and get me some breast milk from a Cambodian immigrant, only the finest of breast milks come from Cambodia"
 
all from one episode:

"MOST BALLA SHIT EVER"(as he cuts off the head of a baby dinasour)

"I SPRINKLE DIAMONDS ON MY FOOD BECAUSE WELL ITS POSSIBLY THE MOST BALLA THING EVER AND IT MAKES MY DOOKIE TWINKLE!!!"

(as dave is showing giant native african masks made out of wood)"YEAH I DONT USUALLY MESS WITH THESE BECAUSE THEY'RE FROM AFRICA AND PEOPLE STARVIN DOWN THERE AND SHIT, AND THAT JUST AINT BALLA.

(as dave opens up his sweatshop with a chinese family making his shoes and a lady yells "jghrgghugvhuhurgvhr"in chinese)

"BE QUIET MTV WILL NOT HELP YOU, I BURN YOUR FEET SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS(while making gesture with hands as if he had a hot peice of iron and poking her with it)"

 
I've got some good news and some bad news, bad news is I'm shuttin down the studio. Good news is I saved a bunch of money on my car insurance
 
i never grinded mud in his couch why would i do that

yeah i grinded mud in his couch

cocaines a hell of a drug

sure its said but "fuck yo couch nigga"
 
Clayton Bigsby: "Hey, niggers! Turn that jungle music down! Woogie boogie, nigger! Woogie boogie!"

Wiggers: "Did he just call us niggers?... AWESOME!"
 
i like to cut out the middle man, i got a fuckin sweatshop bitch

this is history in the making, the first tyranasoarus rex in thousands of years, if only i had my SCISSORS
 
*talking about Kelly Osbourne* "I like the song the girl sings, 'Papa Don't Preach'. Well I got a song for you too, bitch. It's called 'Daughter Don't Sing'."

"Reach for the sky, Honky!"

 
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