The english country fucking BLOWS

hendrik.

hendrik.

Active member
So, earlier this year, i was told my sister was getting married in england. i thought, cool! a week partying in London, it'll be sick. WRONG!

for the past four days i have been stuck in the middle of buttfucknowhere, where my sister is getting married. i think were near birmingham, but thats still like 45 mins away.

anyway, before we left, my sister told us we'd have internet in these cottages were staying in and made them out to be really nice little houses, WRONG AGAIN! we're staying in little piece of shit houses which smell like shit. we spent about 4 hours yesterday trying to start a fire to grill a steak, because they didnt have any sort of lighting fluids or bricks. that was fun, and took up a lot of time.

today ive finally been able to make contact with the real world, and come out of 3rd world poverty. anyway, the english country fucking SUCKS and all the girls here look like dirty white trash skanks. i bet if i lifted the back of any of their t shirts they'd all have skank stamps.

fuck this place. /end rant
 
hahaha my ex girlfriend was english and moved here like 5 years ago. what a dirty white trash skank she was.....
 
English porn is the nuttiest. They use penetration biscotti and get face shots with tea and rub their teeth together and create electrical storms, Pikachu style.
 
UK Maxim has nipples showing. Other than that England pretty much sucks. That and the fact British Airways can suck a fucking cock. They lost my skis, boots, and clothes for a week when I went to switzerland.
 
lived in london for a while this summer and it kicked ass, guess i can't speak for the rest of the country, though.
 
Meh im gonna throw a fuck you down too, thats close to where my family lives and i have no problem with it, maybe you just need to chill your hyperactive ass down and appreciate shit.
 
When I went to england it was kinda disappointing. Most of the people I met seemed to be into Blur and doing cocaine.

Not a good mix.

I feel your pain Hendrik. It's a ghetto country for sure.

London though, London's fucking ILL.

Go to the Saatchi Gallery if you get a chance. It's like, a compilation of the world's most fucked up art, and it's sooooooo wildly absurd. I kinda suspect you won't get the chance. Seriously though, Saatchi Gallery, intense.
 
Seriously, head down to London, or up to Manchester or Liverpool. You're pretty much the same distance from them if you're near Birmingham. Good times to be had there for sure.

If you're in some random cottages in the middle of nowhere, its never gonna be too much fun.

Or, hit up one of the indoor ski slopes. Tamworth would be pretty close to you, or Milton Keynes.
 
Get out of your whole and see the other side of England. London is not England, it is a huge metropolis. Go even to Birgminham or some bigger city, you'll like it better.

Here's a site for some major partying in any major UK city. Check it out dude: www.dontstayin.com/

Hope you have fun :)
 
um, not quite. but fuck you.

jake worle, yes, we've met.

as for people telling me to go to other places, you dont seem to understand that

a) i was stuck in the middle of nowhere

b) i was at the beck and call of my sister and mother who were both freaking out.
 
That really sucks dude. I'm going to be out in the Lakes District in my friends house with a few friends, and yeah, transportation was looking to be an issue. We leased two cars for 30 days while we're over there though, so I think we'll have some fun. Shame we missed each other, I would have totally hooked you up while we were over there with rides to pubs and stuff.
 
Sounds like you're in a shithole, but I wouldn't stereotype a whole country based on this experience. I mean, that's like going to Cando, North Dakoda and then saying, "fuck, the U.S. sucks balls. There's nothing to do but collect road kill and the girls walk around in overalls and have no teeth."
 
im not saying england sucks, on the contrary, its really cool, if you can get over the usually crappy weather....but the countryside is shite.
 
oh, the title of the thread was a little misleading. but yea, that's exactly why everyone congragates in cities nowadays.
 
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