The BEAT (Boobville Entrance Aptitude Test)

the_fuzz

the_fuzz

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The BEAT (Boobville Entrance Aptitude Test)

Give yourself...

•2 points for each of the following publications which you currently subscribe to:

Bigtop

Gent

Field & Stream

Press Bonanza

Popular Mechanics

Bra Buster

Friskee Cut

Melon Town

D-Cup

Milkin' Poppin'

•Give yourself 5 points if you've ever been to Russ Mire's Bra Museum;

•10 points if you cried when you had to leave;

•15 points if you tried to hide so that you could run amuck with your pants down around your ankles after it closed;

•1 point for every time you've yearned to break free of the shackles of the oppressive man and start fresh in a place with a boob-shaped roller coaster;

•5 points for every time you've killed half a day at Victoria's Secret pricing bras for your girlfriend;

•3 points if you took home a catalog;

•10 points if you lied about the whole girlfriend part;

•5 points if you had your mom waiting out in the car the whole time;

•3 points if you brought a sack lunch

•give yourself 10 points if you can fart on command

•deduct 3 points if you haven’t masturbated in the last 2 days

•deduct 5 points if you eat yogurt more than twice a week

•deduct 3 points if you wrap gifts in anything other than newspaper or tin foil

•deduct 1 point for every room you have potpourri in

•deduct 1 point for every skin care product you own

•7 points if you know what you can take off of an 83 camaro to make it faster

•5 points if you know what dragonfly is ( hint: trucker lingo)

•Give yourself 1 point for each of the following skills you possess:

sheet rocking

tin knocking

tub caulking

street walking

trash talking

sheer walling

grab-a-hauling

tree falling

towel installing

hog calling

CPR

65+ points- welcome to hooterville

55-64 points- No touchy!! You must be 20% more man to ride Boob Mountain

54 points or less- see GAT (Gay Aptitude Test)

81 points- you must work round a lot of metal, or a least your in construction

It was a foursome if you go by weight, but it was a two-and-a-half-some if you go by actual sexual activity
 
i had like 3 points

but yeah, last time i checked, my definition of manliness didn't involve hanging out in victoria's secret all day and masturbating to lingerie catalogs.. haha

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My bunghole it goes RRRACACACAAA
 
yea, thats more of a 'how patheric are you' test. i got a 0.

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i get to go see an almond borthers concert on the 4th, cant wait - brentharlen

 
i like titties, i dont need some test to tell me that

gooooo titties

Tip-2-Tip We Rule
 
Yay 1 point for knowing CPR. apparently I'm gay

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''I'd rather die in flaming glory than live a life of mediocrity.''

-Mark Hoppus
 
wow. its almost impossible to get 50 unless ur a pervert, dont have a girlfriend, or go to the mall.

i got like -2

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ARMADAS ARE THE BEST SKI!!!BUY THEM

And no, I'm not getting photo incentives from those ads. If i wanted to do that, I'd just say 'Rip Curl, Nordica, Marker, Level, Astrix.' See? Now i've made money.' - Brad Holmes to some idiot kid from Potland Maine
 
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