So much pain I almost died

Oh also one time I was bending down to put on some shoes, and got one of the metal extensions from a broken umbrella that was sticking up and out, hit me less than 1/2 of a cm from my eye. So lucky I didn't go blind that day.
 
my worst pain was prolly when i went for a little road gap last year on my bike, some how did a superman but didnt get back on adnd landed on my nuts then rode and alittle bit and felll over. that hurt pretty bad. i bet i have had wrose i just cant rember
 
I was sitting at the computer in my boxers, eating a bowl of ramen noodles, and my brother threw a tennis ball and hit the bowl out of my hands. a steaming hot bowl of ramen noodles landed directly on the general.
 
When i was in like 4th grade i think it was, my family spent a week in vail, and my dad cracked his pole (it was fiberglass or something). So the pole had shards going up and down it, and it was late in the spring, so he decided he would get new poles next year. Well one morning, i was ready very quickly after we had parked, so i decided to get all the poles out, that was a bad idea. One of the shards went through my finger, and it was sticking out on both sides so i dropped the pole which broke the pole off from my hand. Now i had a long piece of fiberglass going through my finger, sticking out on both sides and through my glove. I couldnt pull my glove off, so my parents ripped it off, then we had to go to the hospital to get it removed. At the hospital i had to get a few shots in my hand to numb it up, but it turns out the numbing didnt work so the doctor asked if i wanted to have it pulled, or numbed again and then pulled and since i was really afraid of needles at the time, i decided to have it pulled. Another bad idea, this was probably the worst pain in my life.
 
I got hit by a golf ball last year in practice. some kid happy gilmores it right into my calf that was painful
 
i fell down walking onto the metro a couple weeks ago and almost broke my wrist (luckily just horribly sprained)

from hockey- torn bicep

disloacated shoulder

5 concussions

broken fingers/toes

broken nose

broken arm

many many cuts and bruises
 
Severly broke my Humerus twice, second time breaking my wrist as well. Worse thing you can do to your arm. Sprained all my fingers, and right foot. Broke my nose. Disclocated my toe(really weird).
 
when i was little me and my friend were sword fitghing with plastic tubes, then he lunged out at me and i couldnt defend it and it ripped my perfectly good thumb nail clean off.
 
when i was little me and my frend got steak knifes from his kitchen and wer playing sword fighting

he took a swung at my face and i stubbed my toe
 
ugh i think the worst ever was when my (then) 8 year old brother had to pick gravel out of my back that was as close to a hamburger as you would find in the grocery store. he really wasnt very concientious of the severe pain he was inflicting, and to this day has probably not heart such a number of rediculous swears. i had a biking accident and, stupidly, wasn't wearing a shirt, so slid a few hundred feet on my back. i also carved a whole chunk of my leg out but it was so deep that instead of cutting it out, it just attatched itself to the new skin underneath. yuccckkk
 
i bruised my spleen falling off a jungle gym at 8

my friend shot me in the leg with blow gun

split shin ~ 2 inches, damn near to the bone, probly shouldve got stitches, unfortunately didnt

knocked out 4 times on my bike, 2 times with helmet

i guess thats not as impressive as some
 
this weekend i was goign for a backflip and landed on my stomach. now when i read funny things on newschoolers it hurts to laugh because i think i bruised a rib.
 
A fuckin kid clogged my toilet once with just his turn that was about the size of a new born baby. Im dead serious I saw it and about shit my own pants at the sight of this beast.
 
my dad shoved a garden fork through his big toe... we had to get the fire department to cut it off and then the hospitol to get it out, he also cut himself with a chainsaw acidently... he said the msot painful was when he got a neck disc taken out and raplaced with his hip... so much pain
 
i know someone whos was playing tag (ya i know) and was getting chased so he was looking over his sholder and running full speed. He turned his head to see where he was going and a stick went into his eye right between the eyeball and the socket. He went to the doctors after he passed out and a week later when he came back to school, he brought a inch and a half stick that had been stuck in his eye for about two hours. (the rest of it had broken off)

He was a lucky person not to go bliind
 
one time I was puttin the wood to atl ski's mom and I pulled out to far and it went into her ass all dry, that kinda burned
 
i was climbing up a roof and i tried to take a step up but instead a 3 ft. long 6 in. diameter ice chunk fell off onto my brothers head, i ended up straining something in my big toe because i was wearing shoes too big for my feet.
 
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