sketch janitor stories

F

flyinghobo

Member
theres this wiked sketchy janitor at my school named norm, and by sketchy i mean he hit on the freshman and he is atleast 60, so one day he come up to me and my friends and tells us this story about his dog, he say 'i got the poodle dog thing right so the dog loved to swim so i built a ramp into my pool sso it could swim in and out so i finish up the ramp and i'm looking all over my house for the little bitch and i couldn't find it so eventually i looked under the couch and the little basterd had a heart attack, i was so pissed that i had just wasted my time building the ramp that i threw the little fucker in the pool'

Nuke the Whales. Pave the Rainforest. HOBO NATION
 
norm may not have any friends, you should hang out with him, he seems cool.

i was going to go for a quad daffy but i was like, why huck? -mommy
 
norm sounds like a cool guy. go sleep over his house.

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Good Fun With A Hand Gun.

hoodratz47: sweet your now black....
 
i bet he has good candy.

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I have a different stance on abortion: I'm against abortion, but for killing babies. That way everyone loses, and I win. I'm neither pro choice, nor pro life; I'm pro you-shutting-the-hell-up. The only way I'd be 'pro choice' is if it meant I could choose which babies I could abort, and only then if I could lift the age restriction to 80.
 
Our bus driver to the Penn relays for track was named stanko, and he had a heavy eastern european accent and he refused to follow directions. Hes a janitor by the way too. So anyways, in the middle of our trip, he pulls off to the side of the road and gets on a phone, and to us hes just like 'wait wait i have a phonecall that can't wait.' So we are all just like okay stanko you are really weird. Sooo anyways we listen to what htey are talking about, and its an inmate on deathrow who is goign to be recieving lethal injection in a few hours. It was so damn scary.

jibba jabba
 
this teacher i had at catholic middle skool quit and started working floors at the public high school i went to like 50 miles away. he said he was making almost twice as much. his name was wally

 
There is this reall weird looking janitor at our school he has long hair that is red and he is really tall and wears converse allstars and he is like 40. He is so weird looking that they don't let him work school hours, just after school

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Grandmaster CT Skiers

'i am smarter than the average indivitual'-D-Loc AKA 'I'm the coolest'
 
yeah i like talking to our janitors. they don't get too much interaction at our school except from kids who throw juice boxes and water bottles at them, so it's nice to get to know them.

''Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.''

P. J. O'Rourke
 
We have french janitors, they are pretty fucking funny. Gilles is by far the coolest janitor ever. There's also a hot woman janitor who used to be miss Ontario or something, haha.

Smoking pot leads to uhh... I forget.

50 nuts in your mothafuckin' mouth

What's with all the hate?

 
When I was in high school years ago, there was 2 janitors with strong Hungarian accents that sold us sweet imported nuggets and LSD. Only few of us were trusted by them.

 
this at least is like a question about a janitor, not like a shady janitor story, but wouldn't it be the worst thing to be a janitor at a college, watching all these kids walk by on their way to these bright futures while your future fell by the wayside like so many discarded 7-11 cups?

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E.T. is the can-do alien, and don't you forget it
 
the janitors at my school sit by the garage in the morning which was under my class room and the sweet aroma of marijuana could be detected from below if you sat by the window. yeap, pothead janitors, alright.

...trampled by lambs and pecked by the dove...

 
My janitor is a sikh named Major.

Hey Jesus, did you order a cab? -Robin Williams

You could snort ice... -My friend's mom not realizing what she just said.

It's all about the coke! -My woodwork teacher fully aware of what he just said.

ARMADA
 
uuh one of my janitors is from trannsylvania and has a crazy eye

Dad:'I dated a girl that went to that school, Suzy Friedmen'

Mom:'You went out with a jew?'
 
If you told my janitor Mr. Luchies that it was your birthday he would do the 'pretend to crack an egg over your head' thing with his hands... i fucking love mr luchies. Pronounced Loo-Keys

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B
 
The jamitor as the HS i went to was named larry... he's a really cool guy who flipped out on people who didn't like classic rock. He is also an INSANELY good drummer.

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In a haze

A stormy haze

I’ll be around

I’ll be loving you

Always

Always

Here I am

And I’ll take my time

Here I am

And I’ll wait in line

Always

Always...
 
we have a guy doin and apprenticeship with our school janitors. hes like 18 and all he does is walk the halls carrying a monkey wrench and looking like a fool.

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'Hasta la victoria siempre'

Ernesto 'Che' Guevara
 
^ That sucks. haha, i am assuming you are in highschool, so how bad would it suck to be that guy. i mean, u are walkin around learning how to be a janitor, when kids the same age as you are trying to get a future. He prolly gets made fun of a lot.

CUSTOM hats and headbands for sale. Earflaps, strings, visors, lil pom pom thingers, borders. PM me.
 
Haha, our janitor is one of my best friends dads, hes the coolest guy ever.

FARP

'Why did you stop at a red light and let me hit you doing eighty!?'

-Dane Cook.
 
one of our janitors we call stone cold cuz he looks like him and is mean, the other one is crazy. i went in after school to get somethin and he told me and my friend 'hi my name is greg and i was in pinerest so i dont think ot well' and pinerest is this mental institution in grand rapids, it was scary

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me gusta cabeza
 
freshman year at college the janitor in my dorm asked me if i would hook him up with a nug, and then he bugged me like every day after that for buds.

-Strode

Only in my sweetest dreams do my streams lack troubled waters, shallow pools full of shallow fools...
 
lets go ahead and bring this back... cuz janitors are awesome

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yes.. i once found my freind on acid under a blanket and wearing a loin cloth made out of bannna peels

hoodratz47
 
theres a shit load of janitors at my high school and its not even that big. theres one with a mullet that drive the zamboni in between classes and then theres the girl janitors that let me and my friends skate in there in the summer before they wax all the floors. theres a crazy six stair thats awsome to do.and then theres the angry ones that walk around all pissy thinking their job makes the world go round and boss the other ones around i almost feel bad for the cool ones.

-COUNTRY MUSIC GIVES YOU HERPES-

- Hey kids, theres juice under the sink! -

 
in elementary school there was this janitor who looked like a mix of hagrid from harry potter and saddam hussein, when he was captured by the americans. Well anyways this guy used to pick kids up and throw them into snow banks. Now he works at my high school but he's not throwing any of us in snowbanks.

 
i have a janitor named pat that u cant tell is a boy or a girl, he/she has a mullet and i think some boobs so im not sure

DO YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS LARRY, DO YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FUCK A STRANGER IN THE ASS, YOUR KILLING YOUR FATHER LARRY
 
my school has a janitor who's Bosnian, and he has about 4 cars, a truck a mustang, some expensive sports car, and another car. He used to coach the goalkeepers for the girls soccer team, even though he didn't no jack shit abou it. But yeah, we think he deals drugs so he can have those cars.

Other than janitors, my catholic school had a porn star for an english teacher. I never had her, but she got fired.

 
i fucking hate it when the women janitors come into the bathroom while ur takin a shit or something. that fuckin sucks. i think there should be a law against that, especially in school.

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I'm liberal, just so you all know
 
i go to a catholic school and the main building is hugee and our weight room and football locker room is in the basement and thats also where the janitors have there shop for fixing stuff and thats where they all chill and ther eis this one janitor with an irish accent and me and my friend had to take a broken desk down there so we are just sitting there while hes workin on this desk and out of nowhere hes like i got some awsome pussy last nite so we were like uuhh... o thats nice yea... mad weird dude

ok
 
one kid in my brothers class dropped out at 18 to become a janitor at the same school not realizing that he would spend less time there as a student hes pretty damn crazy too he drives a moped, has 2 kids with his wife, and one with his wifes sister, and he tries to get them all to walk the day after they come home from the hospital

 
janitors are strange. i was at my moms school, (she teaches) and the dude was like want some cookies? (i knwo this dude, so i didnt think he was about to molest me) so he takes me into the kitchen, and he has the whole place scoped out, he got me cookies. so g

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yes.. i once found my freind on acid under a blanket and wearing a loin cloth made out of bannna peels

hoodratz47
 
the janitor at my school was named creepy sweepy, or at least that's what everyone called her on account of she was real creepy. She used to always wear clothes from the lost and found, one day she stole my sweater man!

'Ok, punching ain't your thing...but that's ok, you're not that kind of fighter!' -Moe
 
there's a janitor at our school who can only work at night because he's a child molester, you always see him riding his bike like a hobo in the morning from the school....and there's a mexican janitor with a mullet

Reppin' area code 207

As long as i'm alive i'ma live illegal

ESE TAKEOVER....woohoo
 
a couple years ago when i was in middle school, i left my tenor saxaphone out to take home, and the janitor took it and stuck it in his closet. i go and its not where i put it. the teach says we have to write a srry note to him so we can get it back. i just wrote srry and and i wont do it again and that's it and got it back. i still leave it out sumtimes. wackey

Take me to your special place,

Close your eyes show me your face............I'm gonna piss on it

 
theres also another janitor that looks like elvis if he was 80

Take me to your special place,

Close your eyes show me your face............I'm gonna piss on it

 
i bought some pot from a janitor at my school, his name is Joe Korn. he's cool shit.

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don't take me for a joke, i'm no comedian. too many mental problems got me snortin' coke and smokin' weed again.

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no doubt, sit back on the couch, pants down, rubber on, set to turn that ass out. Laid the bitch out, then i put it in her mouth, pulled out, nutted on a towel, then passed out.
 
i was one of the janitors at my school 10th and 11th grade, and i commemorated the first snow of every year by pegging the nerd kid whos voice hasnt changed since 4th grade with a snowball while he cleaned his bathroom, litttle bitch flipped out and couldnt stop screaming at me for over an hour, hehehe good times

'Really, I gotta say that I'm glad you exist, 'cause if there wasn't there'd be noone to make fun of and diss.'

Solider in the NS ARMY

Rollers of NS unite!!!

603 for life

I'm conservative, just so you all know.
 
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