Santa Claus is not real

Shredneck

Shredneck

Active member
I'm telling my kids asap.

I'm watching the news (news 10now for anybody in central NY) and there is a creepy guy with caribou exploiting families into seeing his "reindeer"

So sick of all this commercialized Christmas bullshit, everyone is trying to scam each other out of money. I bought two Christmas cards yesterday, $9.60. bullshit.

 
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO
say_it_aint_so.jpg
 
coke-cola has the best marketing ever. I'm sure your all aware of giving free coke-cola to the soldiers in WW1 that contained coca (not tech. cocaine) so they would be addicted when they came home.
 
yah that is bullshit i mean i remeber when it was ten cents for a card and im only 18. Prices always rise but this messed up with prices all going up because of a holiday its like gas
 
Dog the Bounty Hunter probably found a look a like of Santa's. He is like Saddam, has a crew of guys that look just like him so that the CIA can't find him.
 
seeing that NSG is made 90% up of 12 year olds, i think you just ruined christmas for a lot of kids. my bro trolls this, and he doesnt know yet. time to block it on his computer quick!
 
something my physics teacher showed us in class, #4 and 5 are the best

The Physics Behind Santa Claus



  1. No known species of reindeer can fly. But there are

    300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and

    while most of these are insects and germs, this does not

    completely rule out flying reindeer which only Santa

    has ever seen.




  2. There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world.

    But since Santa doesn't appear to handle the Muslim,

    Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload

    to 15% of the total - 378 million according to Population

    Reference Bureau. At an average census rate of 3.5 children

    per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's

    at least one good child in each.




  3. Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the

    different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming

    he travels east to west, which seems logical. This works out

    to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each

    Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of

    a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the

    chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents

    under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back

    up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the

    next house. Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are

    evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know

    to be false but for the purposes of our calculations we will

    accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a

    total trip of 75-1/2 million miles, not counting stops to do

    what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours, plus

    feeding, etc. This means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650

    miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes

    of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle on earth, the

    Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second. A

    conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.




  4. The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting

    element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a

    medium-sized Lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying

    321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described

    as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more

    than 300 pounds. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see

    point #1) could pull ten times the normal amount, we

    cannot do the job with eight, or even nine. We need 214,200

    reindeer. This increases the payload - not even counting the

    weight of the sleigh - to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison

    - this is four times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth.




  5. 353,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates

    enormous air resistance - this will heat the reindeer up in

    the same fashion as spacecrafts re-entering the earth's

    atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3

    quintillion joules of energy. Per second. Each. In

    short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously,

    exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic

    booms in their wake.The entire reindeer team will be vaporized

    within 4.26 thousandths of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be

    subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500.06 times greater than

    gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim)

    would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds

    of force.





In conclusion, if Santa ever did deliver presents on Christmas

Eve, he's dead now.



 
I am going to laugh so hard if somehow Santa is real and shows up and pulls his best Rambo impersonation on everyone someday just killing everybody.
 
phhhhhht, i call shenanigans, next you'll be trying to tell me the Easter bunny of the tooth fairy is fake
 
guys comeon many of u are in highschool and still get ur new pair of skis from "santa" idk i just like the whole x mas time of the year and im just happy
 
physics behind santa is pretty funny... but a bit of a bummer to see that there is no rea way he could exsist. magic anyone?
 
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