Not really one that cries much. Sometimes feel emotionally void about things to an extent. Idk. It's weird.
But my friend that just passed has been on my mind. It just fucking sucks sometimes. The way time flies in life. Sometimes you don't get an easy chance to meet up with people that you want to catch up with. But there's a limit on those chances in general. Time is number. We don't know what day will be out last.
We were trying to meet up and catch up for some skiing, but with the garbage winter and work and stuff it didn't happen. Figured we'd do some hiking this spring. Relive the glory days of mt jore, west etc. Catch up on everything and just soak in the natural beauty of the place we live.
We didn't end up skiing together this season. I think I briefly saw him at the face in the fall but just quickly in passing. But that "well we can hang out __________" as a thought of a time in the future never came. The season ended, I left for a month and the day I got back, you were gone.
You never know when it's the end, you can't know most of the time. Life is a twisted confusing pile of shit sometimes. Life is precious, life is beautiful, but sometimes it just leaves you there wondering why.
It just sucks. When somebody is on your mind and whether work or whatever, you never make it happen. You delay things for the future and then that future opportunity is just gone. It's fucked.
Such a good fucking person. Too young for that shit. It just doesn't make any fucking sense.
Life's crazy. It just keeps speeding up. The pace just keeps getting faster and while you're trying to keep up, days, months, and years are flying by. It's unrealistic to be able to keep up with everyone, everywhere. It's unrealistic to be able to predict the future and have any idea how long people will be around. But even being realistic, it still fucking sucks when someone you were stoked to hang out with and catch up about everything is gone, gone way too fucking soon, and that chance is nothing but an empty feeling.
It's just bullshit. I just can't believe your really gone. Miss you dude. Hoping you're somewhere better. RIP Shred it up man