random woman jokes
- Thread starter skiman523
- Start date
hoodratz47
Active member
i got few
how does helen keller masterbate
one hand rubbing the other moaning
what do you call an ethiopian with a vaginal desise?
quarter pounder with cheese.
why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
casue it was dead
why did the baby fall out of the tree.?
it was stapled to the monkey
where do you find a dog with no legs?
where you left it
have you ever seen helen kellers house??
no. neather has she
why cant helen keller drive?
casue she dead
whats the differance between a pile of dead babies and a pile of bolwing balls.?
you cant pick up bolwing balls wiht a pitchfork
sand skiing, its like sand boarding but not as gay
how does helen keller masterbate
one hand rubbing the other moaning
what do you call an ethiopian with a vaginal desise?
quarter pounder with cheese.
why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
casue it was dead
why did the baby fall out of the tree.?
it was stapled to the monkey
where do you find a dog with no legs?
where you left it
have you ever seen helen kellers house??
no. neather has she
why cant helen keller drive?
casue she dead
whats the differance between a pile of dead babies and a pile of bolwing balls.?
you cant pick up bolwing balls wiht a pitchfork
sand skiing, its like sand boarding but not as gay
CameIToeJam
Active member
Q.why did the woman cross the road??
A.who gives a fuck??...more importantly, why was she out of the kitchen??
-Craig
the challenge is to be yourself in a world that is trying to make you like everyone else
A.who gives a fuck??...more importantly, why was she out of the kitchen??
-Craig
the challenge is to be yourself in a world that is trying to make you like everyone else
tinkerbell
Active member
I'll admit, I was all set to be offended, but they're rather comical most of them, I'm a bit grossed out by the baby jokes because of this one:
-what's blakc and blue and doesn't like sex?
-the 2-year old in the trunk of my car
-Caitie-
'Have nothing to do with stupid and senseless controversies; you know that they only breed quarrels.' ~2 Timothy 2:23
-what's blakc and blue and doesn't like sex?
-the 2-year old in the trunk of my car
-Caitie-
'Have nothing to do with stupid and senseless controversies; you know that they only breed quarrels.' ~2 Timothy 2:23
Sinister
Active member
the one about the quarter pound cheeseburger offended me.
----------
I changed my sig because someone thought it was too long,so that makes it a shorter sig,doesn't it?Maybe i should make it longer,maybe not,but who gives a fuck?Certainly not me,neither your mom,I like trees,because they grow apples,and I like apples as much as i like weed.
My conclusion is that we should all put some seeds under the ground in some hot country(like mine,where the heat is too hot to move 3 feet away from the swimming pool)and just let it grow,because when i get old i wanna get stoned,but in order to get high i need to improvise some techniques for the growth of pot.
----------
I changed my sig because someone thought it was too long,so that makes it a shorter sig,doesn't it?Maybe i should make it longer,maybe not,but who gives a fuck?Certainly not me,neither your mom,I like trees,because they grow apples,and I like apples as much as i like weed.
My conclusion is that we should all put some seeds under the ground in some hot country(like mine,where the heat is too hot to move 3 feet away from the swimming pool)and just let it grow,because when i get old i wanna get stoned,but in order to get high i need to improvise some techniques for the growth of pot.
Sinister
Active member
Five0
It offended me for the sole reason that i don't think it's fun to make fun of dirt poor starving african people.
----------
I changed my sig because someone thought it was too long,so that makes it a shorter sig,doesn't it?Maybe i should make it longer,maybe not,but who gives a fuck?Certainly not me,neither your mom,I like trees,because they grow apples,and I like apples as much as i like weed.
My conclusion is that we should all put some seeds under the ground in some hot country(like mine,where the heat is too hot to move 3 feet away from the swimming pool)and just let it grow,because when i get old i wanna get stoned,but in order to get high i need to improvise some techniques for the growth of pot.
It offended me for the sole reason that i don't think it's fun to make fun of dirt poor starving african people.
----------
I changed my sig because someone thought it was too long,so that makes it a shorter sig,doesn't it?Maybe i should make it longer,maybe not,but who gives a fuck?Certainly not me,neither your mom,I like trees,because they grow apples,and I like apples as much as i like weed.
My conclusion is that we should all put some seeds under the ground in some hot country(like mine,where the heat is too hot to move 3 feet away from the swimming pool)and just let it grow,because when i get old i wanna get stoned,but in order to get high i need to improvise some techniques for the growth of pot.
snowforblood
Active member
why don't women live on the moon yet?
because there is nothing to clean up.
---------------------------------------------------------
Me: So you like the big powder hits?
Cam Miller: Only when I am snorting them.
=w=
franky - You've got a beat like a cop
hello boys
because there is nothing to clean up.
---------------------------------------------------------
Me: So you like the big powder hits?
Cam Miller: Only when I am snorting them.
=w=
franky - You've got a beat like a cop
hello boys
maxcox9
Member
What do thousands of abused women do wrong every year?
They don't do what they're fucking told!
How many jews can you fit in a vw beetle?
50. two in the front, two in the back and 46 in the ashtray
~~Ride hard, you can rest when you die.~~
I know I'm born to lose, and gambling's for fools, but that's the way I like it baby I don't wanna live forever
They don't do what they're fucking told!
How many jews can you fit in a vw beetle?
50. two in the front, two in the back and 46 in the ashtray
~~Ride hard, you can rest when you die.~~
I know I'm born to lose, and gambling's for fools, but that's the way I like it baby I don't wanna live forever
maxcox9
Member
What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a cadillac?
I don't have a cadillac in my garage.
What's grosser than ten babies nailed to tree?
One baby nailed to ten trees
What does a redneck girl say after losing her virginity?
-Get off me dad, you're crushing my cigarettes
~~Ride hard, you can rest when you die.~~
I know I'm born to lose, and gambling's for fools, but that's the way I like it baby I don't wanna live forever
I don't have a cadillac in my garage.
What's grosser than ten babies nailed to tree?
One baby nailed to ten trees
What does a redneck girl say after losing her virginity?
-Get off me dad, you're crushing my cigarettes
~~Ride hard, you can rest when you die.~~
I know I'm born to lose, and gambling's for fools, but that's the way I like it baby I don't wanna live forever
five0
Active member
whats better than having 3 beautful children?
telling them that they were all accidents
~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
'You can't argue with idiots, they drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.'
'so basically i lost my penis trying to have sex with my cat' Misty7
yeah grandmas with clit rings is so fucken hot now a days, i mean what could be better than a 75 year g-ma with a hairy as hell bush, some juicy labia and a humungous clit that hangs down a good 15 inches, now that my friend is what i call the perfect retro style snatch!~Lateralis
telling them that they were all accidents
~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-
'You can't argue with idiots, they drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.'
'so basically i lost my penis trying to have sex with my cat' Misty7
yeah grandmas with clit rings is so fucken hot now a days, i mean what could be better than a 75 year g-ma with a hairy as hell bush, some juicy labia and a humungous clit that hangs down a good 15 inches, now that my friend is what i call the perfect retro style snatch!~Lateralis
freeride1260
Active member
i dont like racism jfk
Anti-Flag
-Whats so fucking wrong, and whats so anti-establishment about the idea of peace? Why is wanting to know the truth so anti establishment?
These aren't anti-establishment ideas, these are Pro fucking peace ideas-
Anti-Flag
-Whats so fucking wrong, and whats so anti-establishment about the idea of peace? Why is wanting to know the truth so anti establishment?
These aren't anti-establishment ideas, these are Pro fucking peace ideas-
moe
Member
tinkerbell
Active member
haha yeah, jfk that second one was a little much...
-Caitlin-
Have nothing to do with stupid and senseless controversies; you know that they only breed quarrels. --2 Timothy 2:23
-Caitlin-
Have nothing to do with stupid and senseless controversies; you know that they only breed quarrels. --2 Timothy 2:23
i dont get it how people dont mind if you tell jokes about women or dead babies but get serious as soon as it is about blacks. first of all its only a joke and secondly if it would have been a joke about mexicans nobody would have said anything and it would have been just as racist, as you call it, as any joke about blacks.
freeskiing04
Active member
maxcox im going to shoot you in the eye if i ever see you in the street
-Ira
Member No. 8857
Viva La Rèsistance
i think the hustle dance is pretty sick - DENALI44
-Ira
Member No. 8857
Viva La Rèsistance
i think the hustle dance is pretty sick - DENALI44
freeskiing04
Active member
haha those are good baby jokes tho
-Ira
Member No. 8857
Viva La Rèsistance
i think the hustle dance is pretty sick - DENALI44
-Ira
Member No. 8857
Viva La Rèsistance
i think the hustle dance is pretty sick - DENALI44
hoodratz47
Active member
why cant you hear your grandparents having sex... cuase its like trying to fit a marshmello in a piggy bank.....
why cant you hear your grandma taking a pisss.. casue her lips are splashign in the water....
what do you do after eating the finest freshest pussy ever... put teh diaper back onnn..
and they just started getting bad... Hahaah niggaz
---------------------
'Iam sittin here in my Ns hoodie, i have my goggles on and my silk pj's.. God!! i want to ski.. Shorty -T
why cant you hear your grandma taking a pisss.. casue her lips are splashign in the water....
what do you do after eating the finest freshest pussy ever... put teh diaper back onnn..
and they just started getting bad... Hahaah niggaz
---------------------
'Iam sittin here in my Ns hoodie, i have my goggles on and my silk pj's.. God!! i want to ski.. Shorty -T
IrishDrink87
Active member
I have never laughed harder in my entire life.
I dont want a large Farva!
I dont want a large Farva!
whatsupdan
Member
here ya go:
what do you call a blank piece of paper... women's rights
and...
what do you do when you see a woman running through the forest with one arm....
stop laughing and reload
what do you call a blank piece of paper... women's rights
and...
what do you do when you see a woman running through the forest with one arm....
stop laughing and reload
Logchucker
Active member
Whats the difference between a dead baby and a bathtub?
You can't have sex with a bathtub
You can't have sex with a bathtub
Girays_Brother
Active member
these are good keep it coming
i pee on ur face but i dont care..
i take off ur little sisters underwear
shes only three so shes never seen a wee wee
so i told her it was a lollypop and the flavor was salty.
shoved in her mouth, it punctured through her cheek broke the glasses of that three year old geek.
r. kelly did the same but im not about to give him the blame cuz fucking littles girls is just my game
i pee on ur face but i dont care..
i take off ur little sisters underwear
shes only three so shes never seen a wee wee
so i told her it was a lollypop and the flavor was salty.
shoved in her mouth, it punctured through her cheek broke the glasses of that three year old geek.
r. kelly did the same but im not about to give him the blame cuz fucking littles girls is just my game
davidh
Active member
Q: What does an old woman have that a young woman doesn't?
A: A belly button between her boobs.
What do they call a woman who works as hard as a man? Answer: 'Lazy.'
What's the difference between a woman having her period and a terrorist?
A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.
'kind of like semen covered breasts???'
-lateralis regarding two small hills covered in snow.
A: A belly button between her boobs.
What do they call a woman who works as hard as a man? Answer: 'Lazy.'
What's the difference between a woman having her period and a terrorist?
A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.
'kind of like semen covered breasts???'
-lateralis regarding two small hills covered in snow.
davidh
Active member
What do you call a room full of women, half with PMS, half with yeast infections?
A whine and cheese party
Why is it called PMS? -- Because 'Mad Cow Disease' was already taken
A girl goes into the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, the doctor notices a red 'H' on her chest. 'How did you get that mark on your chest?' asks the doctor. 'Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he's so proud of it he never takes off his Harvard sweatshirt, even when we make love,' she replies.
A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a blue 'Y' on her chest. 'How did you get that mark on your chest?' asks the doctor. 'Oh, my boyfriend went to Yale and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Yale sweatshirt, even when we make love,' she replies.
A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a green 'M' on her chest. 'Do you have a boyfriend at Michigan?' asks the doctor.
'No, but I have a girlfriend at Wisconsin, Why do you ask?'
What is the difference between sorority girls and hookers?
Sorority girls cost less per score.
Why does a sorority girl wear underwear?
To keep her ankles warm.
'kind of like semen covered breasts???'
-lateralis regarding two small hills covered in snow.
A whine and cheese party
Why is it called PMS? -- Because 'Mad Cow Disease' was already taken
A girl goes into the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, the doctor notices a red 'H' on her chest. 'How did you get that mark on your chest?' asks the doctor. 'Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he's so proud of it he never takes off his Harvard sweatshirt, even when we make love,' she replies.
A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a blue 'Y' on her chest. 'How did you get that mark on your chest?' asks the doctor. 'Oh, my boyfriend went to Yale and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Yale sweatshirt, even when we make love,' she replies.
A couple of days later, another girl comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a green 'M' on her chest. 'Do you have a boyfriend at Michigan?' asks the doctor.
'No, but I have a girlfriend at Wisconsin, Why do you ask?'
What is the difference between sorority girls and hookers?
Sorority girls cost less per score.
Why does a sorority girl wear underwear?
To keep her ankles warm.
'kind of like semen covered breasts???'
-lateralis regarding two small hills covered in snow.
scratch720
Member
What do you call 20 mexicans pushing a car up a hill?
Grand theft auto.
Grand theft auto.
schlonginator
Active member
Why dont your parents have sex any more???
- ever tried opening up a grilled cheese sandwhich
___________________________
''Shake it like a polaroid picture''
- ever tried opening up a grilled cheese sandwhich
___________________________
''Shake it like a polaroid picture''
hoodratz47
Active member
That was terrable^^^
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
just chillax and slide.. Shorty _t
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
just chillax and slide.. Shorty _t
Parkin
Member
Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking?
They all already have boyfriends.
How can you tell when a man is well hung?
When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.
How many men does it take to tile a bathroom?
Two. If you slice them very thinly.
What did God say after creating man?
I can do so much better.
What is the difference between men and pigs?
Pigs don't turn into men when they drink.
Q-When is a man as smart as a woman
A-When he is plugged in to one.
Q- How come men never sink in water?
A- Shit floats.
heh heh heh.... right back atcha
They all already have boyfriends.
How can you tell when a man is well hung?
When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.
How many men does it take to tile a bathroom?
Two. If you slice them very thinly.
What did God say after creating man?
I can do so much better.
What is the difference between men and pigs?
Pigs don't turn into men when they drink.
Q-When is a man as smart as a woman
A-When he is plugged in to one.
Q- How come men never sink in water?
A- Shit floats.
heh heh heh.... right back atcha