POST YOUR FAVORITE JOKE

whats long black and smells like shit?

the unemployment line.

whats the difference between a nigger and batman?

batman can go out at night without robin.
 
alright i have a good one but its kinda long i think. here goes. So one day there was a hippy on the bus and a nun sit5ting in the front of the bus. the hippy goes up to the nun and asks her if she wll have sex with him. the nun politely says no and gets off of the bus. then the bus driver says "hey, i know how to get that nun to have sex with you." and he tells the hippy to go to the church dressed up in a jesus costume while she is praying. so the hippy shows up at the church in the jesus costume and sure enough the nun comes and sits down and starts praying. then the hippy walks over and says "hello, i am jesus. the only way for me to let you live is if you have sex with me." so the nun thinks for a little while and says"alright ill do it but it has to be anal so i dont lose my virginity. the hippy thinks this is an ok deal so he goes through with it. when they were all finished the hippy stands up, rips off his mask and says "ha im the hippy!" and then the nun stands up and rips off her mask and says "HA im the busdriver!!"
 
how many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?

10, 1 to make the dough and 9 to pel the smarties

your mama's so fat and black, the environmentalists mistook her for an oil spill
 
it's probably already said

so a pirate walks into a bar, right? and he has a gigantic steering wheel in his pants. He walks up to the bar, and the bartend says to him, "hey man, why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?"

The pirate says, "YAAARRRR it's drivin me NUTS!"

aha gotta love that
 
how do you plant dope?

bury a blonde

What happens when a blonde gets alzheimers disease?

her IQ goes up

mahaha i love making fun of myself
 
FUCKING DISNEY CHANNEL, THE PRODUCERS DAUGHTER!!!! I REMEMBER THAT!

im sorry, i promise never to use caps lock again, im just really really excited.
 
no, it just doesnt make sense. like.. its not a joke.

what did i say when i lost my hat?

"wheres my hat?"

thats common sense, its not a joke.
 
whats the difference between a hooker and a mosquito?

one stops suckin when you smack it

(DA DUM TING! [funny drum sound])
 
what has 64 legs and 32 teeth?

a west virginia family reunion.

what is long, black and smells like shit?

the welfare line
 
not a joke, true story. hilarious.

so we walk into Miejers. see an isle sign for femine care product isle. jokingly, we go to find my buddy some tampons. however, the ENTIRE ISLE was kitchen cleaning supllies!!
 
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