POST YOUR FAVORITE JOKE

What's black and white and red all over AND can't fit through doors?

A nun with a spear through her head.
 
*Note: I am in no way a racist this was just funny*

Q:How do you save an Ethiopian from drowning?

A: Throw him a Ceerio

Q: How do you save an Ethiopian family from drowning?

A: Throw them a Honeycomb
 
how many snowboarders does it take to screw in a light bulb?

12. 1 to do it and make a huge deal out of it, 3 to sit around telling him he sucks, 2 to say "ya that was sick" and the rest to sit in the way of the jumps
 
the chicken and the egg have just had sex and the chicken turns to the egg and say's i guess we answered that question.

alot of people dont get that one for a while
 
dead baby jokes are the best.

What more fun then tieing a dead baby to a string and spinning it around and around?

stoppin it with a shovel.
 
this one is pretty bad...

what's the difference between jesus and a picture of jesus?

it only takes one nail to hang a picture.
 
ooo^ that is bad ok heres one and im not racist just have a sense of humor.

Q: whats the difference between a piece of shit in a bucket and a black man

A: the bucket
 
Q:whats the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead black man in the road?

A: the dog had skid marks in front of it
 
I'm not racist in any way but kid in my class told me a bunch of these:

Why do all black people have nightmares?

Because we killed the only one that had a dream!

How are Nike and the KKK similiar?

They both make black people run faster!

What's the difference between a trampoline and a packy?

You have to take of your shoes to jump on a trampoline!

What's the difference between a snake and a black guy?

One's a foul evil creature of satan, the other's a snake!

What does the NAACP really stand for?

Niggers are always causing problems!

that's all I can remember at the second,,,
 
if ur floating down a river in a cement canoe, how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house?

NONE!!! elephants dont have bones
 
FUCK DIREGARD THAT

ok...............if ur floating down a river in a cement canoe and ur weels fall of, how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house?

none!!!pancakes dotn have bones!!i dunno what i was thinking before
 
My friend told me that one today, though its not a question, more of an insult...

Your mother is so big that when she passes in front of the tv, you miss 3 commercials
 
so these two irish guys are following this big mac truck wen all of a sudden the back flies open and thousands of black bowling balls fall out the back and go all over the road. The people pull over in front of the truck and go back to inspect the damage. Already theres at least 30 polish guys attacking the bowling balls with sledge hammers and axes. the irish guys are dumfounded as ask "wat the fuck r u guys doing", the polish guys are like "we gotta kill these nigger eggs before they hatch."

i apologize for the crazy racism
 
haha I GET IT!

okay.

what does the egg say to the boiling pot of water?

it might take me a while to get hard cuz i just got laid yesterday.

AHAHAHAHAHA... Ha... haaaaaaaaaaa
 
Stephen Harper has a dog.

Do you know who else had a dog?

Hitler.

Adolf Hitler.

That's who.

Did Stephen Harper train his dog to attack racial minorities on command?

We don't know.

He's not saying.

Choose your Canada.
 
these redefine stupid....

Have you heard about the new Micheal Jackson doll? You wind it up and it plays with your kids.

_________________________________________

Why are there no amusement parks in China?

Because no one is tall enough to ride the rides!

_________________________________________

One day George W. Bush and Dick Cheney walk into a diner. A waitress walks up to them and asks if she can take their order. Bush leans close to her and says, "Honey, can I have a quickie?"

The waitress is appalled and yells at the President about women's rights and storms away.

Cheney then says to Bush, "George, its pronounced 'quiche'."
 
So there's a Russian a Mexican and an American sitting on the edge of a cliff, discussing life...all of a sudden the russian takes out a bottle of vodka, tkaes one swig and throws it off the cliff. the mexican and american scream and yell "why the hell did you do that" and the russian replays"theres plenty of that in my country".

So then the mexican takes out some weed and rolls a joint, takes one hit adn throws it off the cliff

"Why'd you do that?!"

"there's plenty of that in my country"

So then the american stands up, walks ovwer to the mexican and pushes him off the cliff

The russian guy says"Why the fuck did u do that?!"

and the American says...."theres plenty of them in my country
 
four guys come across a magic lamp, one is caucasian (white for all you idiots), one is black, one is hispanic, and one is asian.

They rub the lamp and out pops a genie. It thanks them for releasing him from the bottle to which he had been imprisoned and agrees to give them all one wish.

First comes the black man. he says that his people have been oppressed for many years in america and wishes that he and all his fellow blacks could be brought back to their home in Africa and be happy. The genie snaps his fingers and the black man along with all other blacks instantly are transported to africa.

Then comes the hispanic. After hearing the black man's wish he wants the same thing only he wants him and all his people happy in his home of Mexico. Again th genie snaps his fingers and the man vanishes along with all mexicans.

Next comes the asian who also likes the wish and asks the genie to bring him and all his people back to his home country of China and be happy. the fingers snap and again the man is gone along with all other asians.

Finally comes the white man. He says to the genie "so you mean to say that all of the blacks, spicks, and chinks are gone from america?" upon seeing the genie nod his head yes, the man replies "i'll have a coke then."
 
q: how many dead babies does it take to paint a wall red?

a: depends how hard you throw them

q: whats more fun than throwing a baby off a bridge?

a: catching it with a pitch fork

mean but hilarious(you can change the baby word to any one that you want)
 
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