Post an evil joke thread

jc_dunn

Active member
Post an evil joke thread. Self explanatory. I'll go first:

So this lady is having a baby. The doctor delivers it with her and when it comes out, he starts bashing it againtst the walls and tables and stuff, than rapes it and bashes it a few more times and throws it out the window.

So the mom is freaking out and, being speechless for so long finally says, "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!?!?". The doctor says, "don't worry about it, i'm just joking,the baby was already dead."

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hahahahah fucken great!

'dont jizzz in a hot tub youll have sperm the size of salmon in a week.'

-Astomp17

My time is winding down.............just wait for it
 
^^hahahaha how great. Btw I think racist jokes should not be included in "evil jokes", there not even funny...

Gravity sucks

"I only drink on 2 occasions. When I'm thirsty, and when I'm not."
 
whats the difference between jews and pizzas?

the pizzas dont scream when you put them in the oven

'dont jizzz in a hot tub youll have sperm the size of salmon in a week.'

-Astomp17

My time is winding down.............just wait for it
 
Ok so 3 guys are walking down a beach... a whitey, black, and a mexican.

The find a lamp and rub it and a Geenie pops out.

The geenie grants them each 1 wish.

The black person says "i want all of my negro brothers to be free and back in africa". Poof all the blacks in america are back in africa.

The mexican says "i want all me and my mexican brothers to be back in mexico". The geenie agrees and all the mexicans are back in mexico.

So now it's the white guys turn. He asks the genie "so you mean to tell me all the niggers and spics are out of america". The genie says yes.

So the white guy says "ok than. I'll have a coke."

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What do you call a bunch of natives around the CN tower?

pubic hair.

o and the last joke was from boondock saints.

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^^haha Boondock Saints.

Q:What's the difference between a nigger qand a pizza?

A:A Pizza can feed a family of 4

Q:What to humans and jelly beans have in common?

A:Nobody likes the black ones.

Q:What do jews and a pineapples have in common?

A:Who cares? Jews suck.

Q: What's worse than 1,000 dead babies in a garbage can?

A:One dead baby in 1,000 garbage cans.

nornornornornornornornornornorn ornornornornornornornornornorno rnornornornornornornornornornor

nornor
nonornornornornornornornor

nornornorno
rnornornornornornor rnornornornornornornornornornor nornornornornornornornornornorn ornornornornornornornornornorno rnornornornornornornornornornor nornornornornornornornornornorn ornornornornornornornornornorno rnornornornornornornornornornor nornornornornornornornornornorn ornornornornornornornornornorno rnornornornornornornornornornor nornornornornornornornornornor
 
Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari?

I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a pizza?

I don't fuck a pizza before I eat it.

'I hear Gemini is gonna be sick'

-Jesus
 
Two children sprint down the stairs Christmas morning to gaze upon a feast of presents brought by Old Saint Nick the night before.

As the two kids examine and compare who has more presents under the tree, they find that the girl has many more than the boy.

"See, Santa Clause likes me more cause he gave me more presents," the little girl proclaimed.

Her brother retorted sharply, "Or you have cancer."

________________________________________

KILL WITH POWER

 
i personaly like the flare that comes from a reply of "yah, well At least i dont have cancer".

Like a virgin on promnight!

-Thom Savery

please pardon the cacography

Capital.City.Rider..Phunkin

.Phatt.Phreerider.

'naahhmahhnahh
hahh

h ... i mean ... the weekend of monday'

"go down to the bottom bunk and finish yourself"

"I may be the last to cross the finish line, but at least im in the first race - pun intended"
 
Ok so theres this guy and he's dying... 2 packs a day for 20 years gave him lung cancer. His goal in life was to break a world record before he died. So in his hospital bed he's reading the guiness book of records... he can't find any he can beat while in the hospital (except for longest time spent in hospital, and he was going to die anyway).

So finally he finds one he can beat... youngest girl ever raped. so he thinks to himself "hey that'll be easy i'll just walk down to the intensive care ward and fuck a baby on tape and send it into guinness."

So he gets his wife to bring him a video camera, and than he sneaks down to the nursery and rapes a baby. When he's done he takes his camera upstairs and puts the tape in an envelope and sends it in.

3 days later he gets the response from Guiness world records- he was going to be in the book!

The next day he dies.

So he goes up to heaven and god is there and he begs god "please i'm so sorry i just wanted to break a world record." God says " don't worry about it... you've got a place in heaven still." The man breathes a sigh of relief.

God says "you must do one thing for me if you want to be in heaven though..."

The man says "anything.".

God says, "Bend over" with an evil grin....

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What do you say if you see your TV floating at night?

Drop it nigger!

I would like to point out that i'm not a racist person... just racist jokes are funny thats all

Whats more fun than throwing a baby off a cliff?

Catching it with a pitchfork.

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how do you save a black dude from drowning?

take your foot off his head

why shouldnt you shoot a black guy on a bike?

cause its probably your bike

 
whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff?

catching them at the bottom with a pitch fork

____________
-Steve Stepp

'Yo these Niggas is tight yo. I roll like this shit next year. You see me, I come up, Peter Olenick, BITCH.'-Macburt(skidynastar180)
 
whats the difference between tires and niggers?

tires dont sing when you put chains on them

_________________________________________
_______

the younger the orange, the tighter the squeeze
 
How do you stick three cocks in your mouth at once?

Ask AtlantaSki

-------------------
'If only real chicks when down this easy' Comic Book Guy
 
whats long, black and smells like shit???

the welfare line

whats the difference between a black person and a bag of shit???

the bag

SteezePleezE Productions

concept headwear all the way

soaps
 
whens the only time u smile at a black guy?

-when your pointing a gun at him

What do u do when u see a black guy with one leg?

-stop laughing and reload

What do u call a 1000 black guys on the moon?

-a good start

What do u call a black guy having sex?

-rape

i am not a racist

Gotta Attack the MOUNTAIN!!!!
 
Q: What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar?

A: May I push your stool in?

Q: What's the difference between a refridgerator and a fag?

A: The fridge doesn't fart when you pull the meat out

big whoop wanna fight about it?
 
What's the difference between a native and a picnic table?

A picnic table can support a family.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

- Matt*

Brent likes to do his women like his boots, rear-entry. eh Chauncy
 
What is the difference between Batman and a black man?

Batman can go out at night without robin.

Why shouldn't you hit a nigger riding a bike?

Because the bike is probably yours.

What do black kids get for Christmas?

Your bike

How do you know Adam and Eve weren't black?

Ever try taking a rib from a nigger?

How long does it take a nigger bitch to shit?

Nine months

What word starts with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person?

Neighbor.

What's the difference between the holy grail and a nigger's daddy?

You may find the grail.

Why don't niggers celebrate Thanksgiving?

KFC isn't open on holidays.

Did you hear about the Japanese bitch who told her husband, "Give me 15 inches and make it hurt."?

He fucked her 5 times and threw her down the stairs.

-------------------
'If only real chicks when down this easy' Comic Book Guy
 
A guy is standing at a urinal when he notices that he's being watched by a midget. Although the little fellow is staring at him intently, the guy doesn't get uncomfortable until the midget drags a small step ladder up next to him, climbs it, and proceeds to admire his privates at close range.

"Wow," comments the midget, "Those are the nicest balls I have ever seen!"

Surprised-and flattered-the man thanks the midget and starts to move away.

"Listen, I know this is a rather strange request," says the little fellow, "but I wonder if you would mind if I touched them."

Again the man is rather startled, but seeing no real harm in it, he obliges the request. The midget reaches out, gets a tight grip on the man's balls, and says, "Okay, hand over your wallet or I'll jump!"

To understand mankind, we must first understand the word. We can break the word down into two sub-words, 'mank' and 'ind'.What these two words mean is a mystery, just like mankind itself.
 
What is a Jews biggest dilemma?

Free pork

-------------------
'If only real chicks when down this easy' Comic Book Guy
 
hahahahaha free pork, that is a classic

To understand mankind, we must first understand the word. We can break the word down into two sub-words, 'mank' and 'ind'.What these two words mean is a mystery, just like mankind itself.
 
where are 3 gay guys in a pool and all of the sudden a condom floats up. what do 2 of the gay guys immediately say?

who farted?

 
ok so 2 guys are running a bowling alley... the bowling alley goes out of business. So they throw all their bowling balls in the back of their truck and start driving to the dump. On the way they hit a black kid on a bike. So they go "aww it's just a nigger no one cares so we'll just drop it off at the dump with the bowling balls." So they throw the kid in the back and keep on driving. Than a cop pulls them over.

The cop goes and looks in the back of the truck. He gets his radio and says "I'm gonna need back up here: i've got a whole truckload of nigger eggs and ones already hatched and stolen a bike".

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only in america

To understand mankind, we must first understand the word. We can break the word down into two sub-words, 'mank' and 'ind'.What these two words mean is a mystery, just like mankind itself.
 
Ok so a guy goes to a whorehouse. So he goes upstairs. As he's waiting for a girl, he notices some apples on the table. So he starts eating them and a super foxy blonde comes in... and screams "your sick" and runs out. So he goes back downstairs and tells them to send a brunette because the blonde ran away for some reason. So the same thing happens with the brunette... only she was even hotter. So now he's really frusterated so he goes downstairs and tells them sto send up a chinese chick.

So he goes up and the chinese girl comes in... Aww sick she screams. The guy says "wait stop" why are you running away?

the chinese girls

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Did you hear the one about the rich Mexican?

...neither did I.

------------------------

Smaller Sig = Claustrophobia
Larger Sig = Endless Void
 
whats the sound that a baby makes in a blender?

i dont remember i was too busy jacking off

=======================================

Just shut up and ski.
 
why do blondes wear earing with big loops?

so they have somewhere to put their feet.

Wanted:

A tall, well built women with good

reputation, who can cook frog

legs, who appreciates a good fuc-

shia garden, classical music and tal-

king without getting too serious.

But please only read lines 1, 3, and 5
 
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