Parents and Sex Talks

It was on the way to skiing. My dad just asked if I knew what it was. I said a little (although I knew completely) So he gave me a long talk, it was really boring. I don't remember what he said.
 
yeah dude, she's actually a model now. she is on the samsung website somewhere. i am pretty damn proud of myself.
 
In Bio 12 I am learning about Reproduction in depth, really in depth! no your average Sex talk

and I have a tutor who is review this with me who is a older women…. Awkward!
 
Parents kinda told me what sex was when i was little, but they dont talk about it at all to me anymore.
 
i got a book, that explained how plants reproduce, and then chickens (that had an amusing picture), and then dogs, and then people.
 
my dad was so fucked up because he was taking some serious painkillers for a slipped disc and had a few beers. he simply said its best to use a rain coat when its raining.
 
dad: do you know what a condom is?

me: yeah.

dad: good, if you get a girl pregnet i'm going to be pissed off.

i dont like my dad much.
 
My parents found shitloads of porn in my room like 2 years ago so I guess they figured they were to late. Lesbian porn, though.
 
dad: i think its time that i give you the birds and the bees speech

me: are you serious?!

dad: yeah you need to know before you do anyhting stupid

me: uhhh. your about 5 years late on this man, we learned all that in 6th grade

dad: oh really?

me: wow. yes we did, and 7th and 9th grade too...

dad: ok then
 
My dad gave it an awkward try until he realized that I knew just as much as he did about it. It was kind of pathetic, but freaking hilarious at the same time.
 
my dad said, jsut use a condom, lol....then he told a story about his friend in high school

His friends dad threw him out of the house and gave him a condom..."DONT COEM BACK TILL YOU DONE SOMETHING"
 
My mom and I were driving to school one morning (my car was in the shop) but anyways she asks me if I need to be on birth control, and I was like where have you been? Ive been on birth control for like the past six months... and he face got really pale and she started to cry and called my dad and he was like well at least shes being careful. It was akward. And then my flushed my pills down the toliet and I was like yeah, because flushing the pills is def. going to keep me from having sex... that was about the extent of my sex talk.
 
i hated mine for the same reason cause my dad is a doctor so he had great ideas of the absolute worst things that can happen. it sucked
 
i dont think i actually ever had one. it would have been way too wierd. they did find condoms though
 
i got my talk like 4 years ago after my mom found out i had sex. she told me to wait till i turned 18 and was responsible and that for my birthday shed put me on birth control. then she made me sign a contract saying that i wouldnt have sex till i was 18 and if i kept my part of the contract, (ITS BEEN 4 YEARS!) then id get something. well now ill be 18 in a week. thank god.
 
yo fool when my parents first talked to me about sex i shot them n left the house, i've been on the run since then. tats true gansta right there
 
Haha. She probably just didn't want to have to pay for an abortion if you got knocked up. Tell us all what you get.
 
why mom tried to pull one of those on me saying how it isnt good to do at a young age, be safe, blah blah, and i found the ultimate way to shut her up. how old were you on your first? she got up and left...
 
shit thats a swwet deal. i seriously cant see myself having sex in the near future and ive been 18 for like 6 months already.

i never get anything cool.
 
my dad and i were taking a flight to winnipeg or some shit, and it was 1 am and we were sitting waiting in a pretty deserted pearson airport when he gave me our first talk. turns out, this really good friend of mine was sitting right behind us and she heard the whole thing. i was 17. wtf
 
never got the talk but my comp got raped by porn when i was 11 don't know how that got there and they figured i knew what i was doing i really didn't know till like a year later though
 
haha this isnt me.. this is a convo btw my friend and his dad

he picked him up from his friends house

dad "hey ____ wheres Rhiaanon?"

friend "she said shes just gunna crash there"

dad " are you stoodid! you coulda got some poooon!"

hahahahahaha
 
my mom bought me a video about sex when i was in 3d grade and made me wach it and i was liek what the fuck. then i went to school and told all my friends what it was and how it worked and noone belived me.
 
word girl. its totally different for us. Im the youngest AND the only girl. It blows.

"You know what all guys want, girl?"

"Yeah dad, i know"

"They want in ur pants. And they'll say anything to get there"

"i know dad..."

"Boys are scum girl, just remember that"

"okay dad"

"Hey girl, what are boys?"

"...scum, dad. boys are scum"

ohhhhhhhh jeeez. My freaking dad.
 
i have never got one, evner sence my dad walked in on me getting it on with one of my first girlfriend. I think he just figured i must know whats going on
 
haha i was supposed to have one may long weekend from my aunt (its like a tradition she gives them)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top