On Using a Port-a-Potty
- Thread starter Imagination
- Start date
henrytargett
Member
this is funny.
Sam.Carson
Active member
hahahhahaha that was great. he met his wife by calling her number on the wall!!!!
hoodratz47
Active member
it was a heroin spoon.. duh..... and those handicap shitters are awesome.. did you se those giant portable urinals fucking gnar..
fucking holla at portland though
fucking holla at portland though
Mike-O
Active member
In Finland, it seems that everything that is free to the public will be fucked up beyong recognition in a short time.
Though portapotties are pretty gruesome at times, finding a virgin one is cool. Now imagine a roadside rest area, with a large portable toilet hut with a separate urinal and toilet, that is planted firmly on to the ground. From the outside, it looks clean and inviting, especially if you have to take poke the turtle out in the middle of nowhere and there's still long ways to go.
Then you open the door. While the door shifts open, you feel like there was something on the inside of the handle. You look down at your hand. It is shit. Good ol' humanos feces. You are grossed out to the max by falling for such an "elaborate" prank, but you stride on in to at least get yourself cleaned up.
It's nighttime and it is pitch dark in February. There is a light socket in the roof. The bulb is smashed to bits on the floor. Still holding your brown-infested left hand ahead and away from the rest of your body, you reach out for your phone to help the screen light find your bearings in the pit of doom. The first thing you see is the urinal - it is full of shit and piss, clogged with toilet paper. A large truck drives by and the vibrations cause the hazardous poop juice to skew and spill on the floor a bit. Then you look on the floor. Ohhhhh shit.
Ever seen Trainspotting? The worst toilet in Scotland? The site before your eyes was infinitely worse than what was depicted in the film. For some reason, a sensory reaction of the putrid smell didn't hit your nose hairs until now. It reeks. It absolutely reeks and you can feel the pukey stomach acid climbing up and gurgling your throat, but you push it back. You think of your hand. You think of your need to shit, and now dismiss it completely. Paper. Water. Need.
You turn the light around and see the shimmer from the now-tagged soap dispenser. "PJ FO LYFE". Sure. It is now that you see a glimpse of the wall where the dispenser is attached to. It is smeared full of shit. All over. To you, it seems like some haphazard cave painting, as if someone who smears shit on walls actually tried to do something coherent with the idea. The puke is climbing and with every new discovery it seems the smell is getting worse.
Finally! The sink for washing your han... iiit's full of shit. Ok. This is getting out of hand. How can something like this happen in such a civilized and advanced country? What makes a person, who by all means is capable of love, empathy and joy, do something like this to his fellow man? Are these people normal in every other way and just happen to vent their seemingly twisted ideas into a roadside toilet in the middle of Buttfuck Hoo-Haa? Do they just go along with their day after smearing a shit circle on the wall and defecating in a wall urinal filled with gaudy remnants of urine?
Then I saw the toilet, as the stall door was slightly ajar. Words cannot describe the state it was in, but I'll say this: the pile of shit and paper rising from the bowl was higher that the back of the toilet. I turned away and walked back to my car. I asked my girlfriend to give me paper and to keep using the rinse mechanic for the windshield until I felt cleansed enough to not feel like Mr. Feceshand.
I'm never going to even think about entering one of those literal shitholes again.
Though portapotties are pretty gruesome at times, finding a virgin one is cool. Now imagine a roadside rest area, with a large portable toilet hut with a separate urinal and toilet, that is planted firmly on to the ground. From the outside, it looks clean and inviting, especially if you have to take poke the turtle out in the middle of nowhere and there's still long ways to go.
Then you open the door. While the door shifts open, you feel like there was something on the inside of the handle. You look down at your hand. It is shit. Good ol' humanos feces. You are grossed out to the max by falling for such an "elaborate" prank, but you stride on in to at least get yourself cleaned up.
It's nighttime and it is pitch dark in February. There is a light socket in the roof. The bulb is smashed to bits on the floor. Still holding your brown-infested left hand ahead and away from the rest of your body, you reach out for your phone to help the screen light find your bearings in the pit of doom. The first thing you see is the urinal - it is full of shit and piss, clogged with toilet paper. A large truck drives by and the vibrations cause the hazardous poop juice to skew and spill on the floor a bit. Then you look on the floor. Ohhhhh shit.
Ever seen Trainspotting? The worst toilet in Scotland? The site before your eyes was infinitely worse than what was depicted in the film. For some reason, a sensory reaction of the putrid smell didn't hit your nose hairs until now. It reeks. It absolutely reeks and you can feel the pukey stomach acid climbing up and gurgling your throat, but you push it back. You think of your hand. You think of your need to shit, and now dismiss it completely. Paper. Water. Need.
You turn the light around and see the shimmer from the now-tagged soap dispenser. "PJ FO LYFE". Sure. It is now that you see a glimpse of the wall where the dispenser is attached to. It is smeared full of shit. All over. To you, it seems like some haphazard cave painting, as if someone who smears shit on walls actually tried to do something coherent with the idea. The puke is climbing and with every new discovery it seems the smell is getting worse.
Finally! The sink for washing your han... iiit's full of shit. Ok. This is getting out of hand. How can something like this happen in such a civilized and advanced country? What makes a person, who by all means is capable of love, empathy and joy, do something like this to his fellow man? Are these people normal in every other way and just happen to vent their seemingly twisted ideas into a roadside toilet in the middle of Buttfuck Hoo-Haa? Do they just go along with their day after smearing a shit circle on the wall and defecating in a wall urinal filled with gaudy remnants of urine?
Then I saw the toilet, as the stall door was slightly ajar. Words cannot describe the state it was in, but I'll say this: the pile of shit and paper rising from the bowl was higher that the back of the toilet. I turned away and walked back to my car. I asked my girlfriend to give me paper and to keep using the rinse mechanic for the windshield until I felt cleansed enough to not feel like Mr. Feceshand.
I'm never going to even think about entering one of those literal shitholes again.
skithesprings
Active member
if i lived in finland i would smear shit everywhere too...
LolklonVolkls
Member
Why would you go in a porta potty when you can just pee in the woods?
Petersaurusrex
Active member
You are the worst type of person.
james6345789
Active member
i've always wanted to take a dump in a portapotty urinal. or a regular urinal for that matter.
skithesprings
Active member
enjoy your... uh... fish sticks, beeyotch!
skithesprings
Active member
mostly just this.
Didn't think it was that good. Hoped for better.
Some porta potties are straight fucked. At bisco there was one on a hill so the door always hun open. The open door made people more likely to go piss in that one. It filled up to the top. I went in and saw it and noticed it was a bad idea. Went in the one next to it to piss. Somebody pissed in the other while i was there though. it overflowed on his feet. mmmmmmm, stupid people
Some porta potties are straight fucked. At bisco there was one on a hill so the door always hun open. The open door made people more likely to go piss in that one. It filled up to the top. I went in and saw it and noticed it was a bad idea. Went in the one next to it to piss. Somebody pissed in the other while i was there though. it overflowed on his feet. mmmmmmm, stupid people
Yourboybangs
Member
LOL once I was at this out door concert and saw these 20ish year old guys watch their bud go into the porta potty and then tip it.Poor dude
At high school one of the biggest assholes of my year once got locked up in one at a party.The kid got mad wasted and had to puke in the portapotty. then a couple of kids tipped it over onto the side with the door, the poor kid was stuck in there for more than an hour, even tough he was a huge asshole, i wouldn't even wish such horror upon my worst enemy ...
the best part was that he had to call his dad to come save him, so his dad, a fancy businessman in a suit rolls up in this brand new mercedes with pale leather interior to come save his drunken, locked up and poo-covered son ... shit was hilarious but also pretty bad at the same time, if it wouldn't have been an asshole i'd have more problems with it, but since this kid was the worst i only have some minor mixed feelings
the best part was that he had to call his dad to come save him, so his dad, a fancy businessman in a suit rolls up in this brand new mercedes with pale leather interior to come save his drunken, locked up and poo-covered son ... shit was hilarious but also pretty bad at the same time, if it wouldn't have been an asshole i'd have more problems with it, but since this kid was the worst i only have some minor mixed feelings
