Official shitty joke thread

[BAYKUR]

What's brown and sticky?

A stick

 

[El_Barto.]

who's a faggot ?

op

hahahahaha

 

[JGWI]

Whats fat and round?

The sun

I dunno.

 

[lurking]

who's a faggot ?

op

Not that shitty of a joke

 

[fresh_prince]

who's a faggot ?

op

who just got banned?

you did

 

[lurking]

what is small and brown

OP

Who just double posted and made no sense in the second post?

You did

 

[msg]

Two fish are in a tank.

One says, "how the fuck do you drive this thing?"

 

[Mingg]

What's green and has wheels?

Grass... I lied about the wheels

 

[assatrailz]

Why did the chicken cross the road?

 

[Chron_Rabbit]

two muffins are in an oven

one says "man its hot in here!"

the other muffin says "holy shit a talking muffin"

 

[DJtearegas]

who told the gorilla he couldn't go to the ballet?

just the people who are in charge of that decision

 

[Spagett+]

equality

 

[fresh_prince]

Why did the chicken cross the road?

to fuk ur bitch

 

[assatrailz]

to fuk ur bitch

No to fuk ur bitch

 

[El_Barto.]

who's a faggot ?

op

Mods are doing a bang up here job.

 

[O.Ps-Mom]

Why was the little boy crying?

Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

 

[toastyteenagers]

snatching up bans quickly I see

 

[no_steeze]

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?

An investigator

 

[soHarsh]

Why did the frog take the bus?

Its car got toad.

 

[Mingg]

Mods are doing a bang up here job.

They must agree...

 

[El.Guapo]

where does the king keep his armies?

In his sleevies

 

[Shredsterr]

What do an eagle and a ground hog have in common? They both live underground, apart from the eagle.

What the difference between a garbage truck and a bench? One's a garbage truck, the other's a bench.

 

[MacNsteaze]

i would tell you guys a pizza joke,

buts its to cheesy....

 

[JohnBolea]

What does micheal jackson have in common with an xbox theyre both plastic and little boys turn them on

What do you call someone that acts like a noodle a impasta

 

[Lé.Skiing]

Whats fat and round?

The sun

I dunno.

I think I can fix this... Maybe.

What's phat and out of this world?

The Sun

I feel it's close, but I dunno.

 

[Ghoster]

What's red and smells like blue paint?

Red Paint

 

[Lé.Skiing]

[video]http://youtu.be/Ve1d-gCcOS0[/video]

Had to post this.

 

[TurquoiseGrizzly]

Tom Wallisch

 

[Shredsterr]

What do you call a seagull standing near a baby?

A seagull

 

[jensen]

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work?

A stick.

What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

Dam

 

[Mr.softcookie]

What did the ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing, they just waved.

 

[DirtYStylE]

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

The holocaust.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream?

He was hit by a bus.

 

[cydwhit]

what's white and black and red all over?

A nun falling down stairs...

Sorry, that's my dad's favorite joke

 

[K-Dot.]

What's better than roses on your piano?

Tulips on your organ.

 

[airplaneface]

I like my women like I like my coffee.

Without a Penis

 

[ianrich511]

What do you call a black person flying a plane?

A pilot, you racist.

 

[byubound]

What concert costs 45 cents?

Fiddy cent ft. Nickelback

 

[ed.je]

what do you call someone who used to like tractors?

an extractor fan.

 

[freidchicken]

how do you confuse a blonde?

paint yourself green and throw forks and candles at them.

 

[toastyteenagers]

the one incorporeal being said to each other while holding the phone: I'm not here

 

[drangus.]

today my pal tried a flip and over rotated, knocked the wind outta him, saw star etc.

anyway.... heres my joke

we were on the lift and i held up my mit and was like how many fingers am i holding up??

he didnt think it was funny tho

 

[*DUMBCAN*]

Rick Astley will lend you any disney movie you want, except one.

cos He's Never Gonna Give You 'Up'.

 

[Jayslatt]

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer?

We are both lawyers

 

[influenza]

MR. Lehy is that you or the liquor talking?

I am the liquor

 

[broto]

yo these jokes r off the wall

 

[percs]

What do you call two fat people having a chat?

A heavy discussion

 

[_Jeffrey_]

What do you call a big pile of kittens?

A Meowntain

Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippie?

Because he was too far out man

 

[byubound]

How does Harry Potter get down the hill?

He just walks.

JK, rolling.

 

[fresh_prince]

what goes in ovens and is jewish?

A kosher dinner in the oven

 

[Slush]

yo these jokes r off the wall

Had a good laugh at these

 

[proZach]

what's mario's favorite pair of jeans?

denim denim denim