NS CONFESSIONS

heres anouther confession from me, i dont know anyone on this site that would care about this, so ill just do it like this.

new years eve this year (yes it all happens at ny for me), i was at a big event, went for 6 days, 20,000 people. none of my mates had taken someone home or anything, and the only people getting roots wre the dudes with girlfriends, so i made it my mission to fuck a bitch on new years eve. i was grinding on some chick and things went from there, my 1st confession, the chick told me she was 22, (yes older chicks aswel, idk how i pick up older chicks, like actualy) annnyway, she asked how old i was... i thot that if i told her i was 18 and had just finished school she would leave, so i said i was 21 turning 22 this year (09)...things worked out, and we went back to her tent. we started getting it done, and i was prety pissed, so as you know you last for ever.. now the thing is, i wsnt attracted to this chick at all, i mean she was alright, but not someone i would go with sober, i just wanted to bang her. so after 40 minutes of smashing her, i got bored as hell, my intentions were a quick in and out and then see you later, but i would never leve without leaving my mark, but i was starting to loose my hardon.. so i started picturing my best mates girlfriend, who i think is super hot and have a mad crush on her, but lets keep that a secret, coz hes mad in love with her, and theyv been together 4 ever. and what do you know, about 10 seconds after i started picturing her, i blow my load....

sparknotes, fucking some chick on new year, lasted forever, wanted to finish, so pretended it was my best mates hot girlfreind, and i came straight away
 
that almost happened to me once but i was doing extreme walking but mad funny story hahahahahahahahhahahahaha
 
i was super crunk like 2 weeks ago at my friends party and i was like almost passing out and there was this girll i had been going for all night (she is incredible, like hottest girl i know), but she was having none of it and actually got with my friend who was throwing the party so anyways im saying goodbye to everyone cause my friend had called a cab and it was waiting outside. so im hugging everybody and this girl comes up and gives me a hug, and im so drunk ive started to kinda drool ( ya thats a weird thing i do when im drunk ) so im wrapping my arms around her and she gives me this super long hug, and like partway through i start drooling and i drool like all over her back. and nobody noticed so i just like said i had to go and she never found out but i always feel really bad about it..

that was gross.

 
thats f*cking deep... not gnna lie i know how that guy feels.

to be totally honest i was expecting the last few lines to go like this:

"To this day i go over to her house, early in

the morning to hang out with her not to "keep the later part of the day

clear" but so i can curl up with her in her bed, and maybe if i'm lucky

get to kiss her. Then I whistled for a cab and when it came near, the license plate said fresh and there were dice in the mirror, if anything i could say that this cab was rare but i thought naw forget it, yo holmes, to bel air!"
 
oh woow uh k.

1. i cryed to the song i feel like dying by lil wayne( i was sooooo baked)

2. i took a piss into a cup on a grey hound bus

i got more but i cant think of them

 
This thread is useless without people sending hilarious shit to that email.

I don't even care if you send in anon, just send it.
 
This is good.



So i was in Bc Canada, in a nice lodgey hotel in a very small town, the

hotel was pretty busy because they use it for the heli operations that

run out of this place (im not saying where this is for a reason),

anyway, im in the shower, and notice the shampoo bottle is half full,

cool, they dont change it between guests, i understood that it would

cost too much money to keep changing it over, so anyway, i knew that

once id left, more guests would come use our room and this shampoo

bottle, so i got my dick hard, started beating it off, then came into

the shampoo bottle, screwed the lid back on, got changed, then cheaked

out (it was my last day anyway).. i now hate to think who used that and

now has my semen in their hair
 
Send moar.

ok so i have two i think i should share:

this isn't really a "cool story hansel" moment but oh well. in high school

there was a guy i had known for oh maybe 10 years. we had kinda grown

up together. he had been dating this girl on and off for 2 years

and she used him and treated him like shit (he was rollin deep) anyways

he and i were sitting in his basement and he confessed to me that he had

always liked me but considered me like a little sister so he felt weird

ever making a move. i thought to myself holy fucking shit this is exactly what

i want. so of course i pulled him on top of me and had one of the best fucks

i've ever had...it was like angst and idk crazy. well he knew that his gf

would never let him go but he and i still wanted to be together. we thought of

hundreds of ideas of how he could get her to go away but none prevailed. throughout

the remainder of their relationship another year..he would have her over just to

make her happy (not fuck her or anything) and then as soon as she would leave he'd

come get me and bring me back to his house. he treated me like a princess and

told me that he wanted to be with me forever no matter what.

best guy i've ever known but he moved far far away, we still talk but in a way have

moved on.

second confession:

my best friend in high school had an amazingly gorgeous older brother.. he was like

a fucking god or something. we went to their vacation home at a lake and the entire time

we were there i fucked her brother. i faked sick one of the nights just to stay home with him

he was 22 and i was 17 so he could do what he wanted. every surface of their vacation home was

graced my ass. good times.



 
I was reading this thinking wtf kinda gay shit is this, then I realized it was from a girl's point of view... >_
 
This is a story that one of my friends told me happened to him when he was younger and although it didn't happen to me i thought it was too funny to not share.
So he was 8 or 9 at the time and his mom is like an uber douche (she once grounded him for 6 months for throwing a snowball at a car), So anyway he was at home playing with his younger brother and sister and had just learned the word "shit" at school that day. Well anyway they are playing and his brother takes the remote control car away from him that he was playing with, so he then yells at his brother "SHIT YOU!" not knowing what it meant at all. His mom then comes into the room and asks "WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?", and he responds by saying "SHIT YOU TOO!". She then tells him that he's in time out in his room until dinner (around 2 hours). well he storms in there and about 10 minute later after he has calmed down for the injustice that has be caused he realizes that he has to take a crap really badly, but his mom says that he can't come out for any reason. He then thinks of a brilliant idea to solve two problems at once, he then proceeds to take a crap on his floor and wiped his ass with one of his shirts, but thats not enough he then picks up the crap and begins to smear it on his bed, cloths walls and floor and roof. Well when his mom came in to get him for dinner she was petrified to see the entire room covered in shit top to bottom. She then made him clean it up for the next 4 hours.
another crap story
One of my friends was really drunk went to Mcdonalds ordered a burger took a crap in it and took it back cuz he thought he would then get a free one.....
 
so my bf of 3 yrs, wanted us to make a porn video for his birthday,

i finally agreed and we made one, but i decided to hold on to

it. i put it in an the Cinderella movie dvd box that i had in my room...well a couple

months later my little cousins came over and my mom went in search of some kids movies

just so happened that she chose the video that i was the star of...lets just say she knows

im not a little princess anymore
 
Once i made one of my friends sit in a baby seat on the back of a bike, and we fell over ... but som how his nut sack was stuck to the seat and i laughed so hard i pissed my self right on the side walk
 
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