My drug test story.

spidey

spidey

Member
i swear this is true- read the whole thing, its worth it.

so its may last school year and there was about 2 weeks left of school. A few buddies and i decided to go smoke a bowl (it actually ended up being like 4) before our first class. so we go down the trail by our school and smoke, then we go to class. I dont think i've ever laughed so much in my life. It was a friday, and our teacher was just putting word scrambles on the board for fun. idk, i thought one of them looked like "tonichiwa" so i yelled that out and sounded retarded but thats okay cause i was pretty high. Anyways. I made it through 3 mores hours of classes just fine. Then lunch rolled around. As i bounced against the vending machine case, my principle, mr. glocke walks up to me and said to come to his office. so i followed him there, still quite high, and sat down. Heres our convo:

Mr. Glockle: "Matt, one of your teachers said you didnt seem like yourself today."

Me: "I'm Matt."

Mr. Glockle: "they said that you look like your high."

Me: "Mr. Glockle, you know i dont use drugs, so theres no way I could be high now is there?"

Mr. Glockle: "well you look high."

this is where i made my mistake (besides the fact that i got blazed in school)

"Mr. Glockle, if you think im high, drug test me."

So, seeing through my attempted bluff, he brought me to the nurses office, where she took some info. I had the blood pressure and the heartrate of someone who had just been sprinting. When asked about this, i told her "I drank like alot of red bulls this morning".

Well neither Glockle or the nurse could prove I was high so i was sent to my next class. About a half hour later, Glockle came to get me again. He brought me out into the hallway and told me that my mom was picking me up at 3:30 and sent me back to class. At 3:15 i called my mom and asked why she was picking me up and she told me "you told glockle to drug test you so im bring you to the hospital to get you drug tested".

hearing that sucked ass. with the 15 minutes i had til 3:15, i needed to find some clean piss. I asked like 20 people, including my locker parter (fuck you marky) to piss in a bottle for me. FINALLY, i got my friend gabe to do the dirty business. When he was done, i poured gabes piss into a zip-loc bag, which i stuffed into my sock.

My mom picked me up, brought me to the hospital, and i went into the bathroom to piss in a cup. i ran the bag of piss under warm water and poured it into the cup.

The next day, the hospital called with my test results. My mom was so proud of me for "not being high". =D
 
hahaha thats great dude. everyone always says that when you switch someones piss and then you give it to them they know cause its cold. i never even thought about running it under hot water thats pretty simple too.

i dunno if its just me thats never heard of that but cool story
 
haha way to go

i would have done the same thing, but i would have been so pissed (pun intended) if the bag would have opened and all the pee would have been in my shoes....
 
damn thats so sick that you got away with it. we have this tradition where we get high every tuesday before arts and ideas class. its the most fucked up class ever
 
you should have been able to think straight after three hours and 4 bowls bro. but then again wake-n-bakes are gnarly
 
Haha telling your principal to drug test you probably wasn't a great idea. I'm really impressed with the ziplock bag in the sock though that is genius.
 
...maybe if its your first time..but I'm saying even if he was a lightweight he could most likely think straight after three hours... by the way you shouldn't talk about things you don't really know about
 
yeah it would go away a little after three hours but you would still feel it and just because my name isnt marijuana doesnt mean i dont know about it douche. youve probably smoked once in your life and you think your cool.
 
funny story i enjoyed it alot. i liked that you didnt get in any trouble : ). by why did you have to go to the hospital to take a drug test? why didnt you just say thats rediculous im not going.??
 
haha yeah good story. + karma. im suprised they didnt notice the temp of it tho...even tho it wasnt too long between them pissing and it goin into the cup, it still woulda cooled some, atleast below the reg temp. sock was a good place tho.
 
fucking epic. when i went to get my drug test they had the sink turned off. No water in the bowl and they searched me. i had to go to like a actual drug testing place. But by the way your teachers are assholes
 
so you were baked for like 4 hours off 4 bowls between a few friends, lol, thats weak and uneblievable, the longest i have ever been high from one sitting, not like smoking consistantly over a period of time, was like 3 hours max.
 
haha, one of my teachers called my friend out on being drunk in school, which wasnt true, but it was because apparently he smelled like alcohol
 
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