Lift Stories

i rode up with some a guy and a girl who were getting high the whole ride up it was like a 6min ride an they sucked down an entire joint
 
i was sitting on the lift like a week ago at snoqualmie. there's this part where the lift gets pretty close to the ground maybe like 9 feet or so. this guy is skiing right under the lift, and decided to go of this mogul jump/drop thing. popped way too much and hit his face on my skis. i hope he's alright.
 
haha we had a rebellion against skipartol last weekend. aparently in nys you have to have a license to do inverts??? and there are signs all over saying no inverts and shit, so my friend decides to go all upside down and what not. ski patrol comes and yells as us, and then we were talking to the lifties about how they were such dicks, and how the lifties think their pricks and whatnot. then my friends hat fell off doing a flipper, and someone brought it down to the liftie, she said she would sell it back for a beer. then another liftie said fuck the patrollers, and do whatever we want.

best part, igot it all on video,
 
spring skiing, saw the best ass in tna pants ever get onto the chairlift infront of me and the liftie went hard, and the liftie was a girl!
 
Random on the Chair Lift: "Yo Dude how ya doin? Mind if I pack a bowl?!"

Me: "Naw dude its cool, have at it."

Random: " You wanna hit of this man?"

Me: "No dude, im straight, its cool."

Random: " So Where ya from?"

Me: "Minnesnowta pimpin."

Random: "DAMN DUDE! THERE'S A LOT OF YOU FUCKERS OUT HERE!"

He was referring to Colorado. We were at Keystone. There is also a lof of us in Utah. Check it.

Late.
 
today i was skiing up at my local mountain and on the way up in the middle of the slope i saw a 40 year old guy smoking a ciggarette with a bunch of people around lol

a few weeks ago on my way up i saw a kid skiing straight down the mountain and his skis started wobbling really bad and he double ejected and had a yard sale within like a 30 foot radius
 
we used to light the lifts on fire..it was funny and it was like 3 years ago put aton of axe on it and lite it the whole thing would turn into flames and it would go out after a few minutes then we got yelled at but the guy didnt care.

another time..

i thought i saw a friend and i had a full like ultra large pop and i dropped it off hit him right in the chest it blew up everywhere supper funny the funnest thing was.. it wasnt my friend i guess hahaha
 
when me and my buddies get on the lift with a single rider we talk about all the crazy butt sex we have been into lately and how greatly we enjoyed it
 
today there was this race at my hill and the orange florecent rope stuff fell down after the race and this kid went over it once than carved back over it got caught duoble ejected and landed right on his face it was great

another time i was like 10 and i was on the hill satnding there with my mom and my brother who was 15 at the time was on the lift with 2 friends and out of nowhere he jumped like 15 feet to flat ( hes a snowboarder) and my mom just said waht are you doing? his ecuse was that he was slipping and if he didnt jump he would have fallen on his face and died it was awesome
 
so I was at Killington on Saturday and I get in the gondola with 3 guys who had obviously been smoking/ were stoned out of their minds, which I'm cool with but my mom was with me making it funny as hell. one dude picks up his ipod and turns up the volume to show us all this awesome video hahaha. after I got off I was waiting for my mom to rant about the cursing and the baggy clothes (the same shit she yells at me about) and she was like they were nice and funny. I was like k mom. they were snowboarding but are you on ns?
 
me and a mate were riding the lift up to snowpark and they had just closed the quarter pipe. This snowboarder didnt notice the flurescent rop that they use to close it, so he goes flying into it at the bottom of the pipe and gets clotheslined by it, ending up flat on his back sliding up the qp.
 
Okay so I was on the gondola at northstar and there was this guy with rental public enemys and this is the conversation.

Me: Nice skis

Gaper: Yeah I didnt want to mount them center because I wanted them to be good in the bumps.

So I just chuckle and ignore him for the end of the ride
 
So me and my buddies were in Smuggs,VT. We were on the lift,both of us didnt want to put up the saftey bar either.So at the last second he whips up the safty bar which was heavy as hell.It comes down and hits me dead in the mouth.I was bleeding everywhere,our rents were a couple lifts behind us. So i got out a peice of eclipse gum and covered it in blood. When my mom got off the lift she was crying.It was a good time.
 
not really a funny story, but kind of weird

so I was up night skiing yesterday evening, and on 4 different lift rides up I saw one or two people on the bunny hill, walking downhill, holding their skis and poles..

I admit it was pretty icy, but come on..

I also saw snow limos. why you would want to hire one of those at a small mountain like grouse is beyond me.. just to go down the cut?
 
yeah i wish pissing off the lift (night skiing) and pissed on a kid cuz this lift was going up and the traisl were were passing dont have light and i didint see him and he was looking for his glove
 
haha word i was waiting in line one day , this little racer girl no more than 11, skis ove rmy board, cuts infront of me, then turns around and says, theres a line here you know.
 
so a couple of weeks ago me and my brother decide to go piss of ski patrol and get them to chase us. good fun and all. so later in the day we are waiting in the lift line and two patrolers come up behind us. i hear on say to the other, they last say him on frontside going way to fast but i didnt see him. once we are on the lift i tell this to my brother. and he's like there still chasing us? anyways we get to the top of the chair and sit and wait for my dad. then the patrols get off and we listen to what they say" he's wearing a blue oakley jacket but i didnt see him" so my brothers standing right in front of them wearing a his oakley ozone jacket. and then they ski off. we where laughing so hard. it was hilarious.
 
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umm.. it's like a seat or wheelchair except with skis on the bottom, and some crazy person sits in it and has someone "drive" them down the hill instead of skiing.

they can be hired at whistler and grouse I guess too
 
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HAHAHAH ho fucking gy. I could see if you were like 100years old and wanted to cruise around for a whil but what fucking able bodied person would do that.
 
you know how they stop the lift, well they stopped the lift and these two like 9 year olds in the lift ahead was maybe 2 feet from getting to the off ramp, the lift had been stopped for like 10 minutes when the two little kids infront of me try and jump for the off ramp, one makes it and the other one falls into the net below, which made the lift stop for an additional ten minutes
 
So I am sitting on the chairlift with this stranger and no one is saying anything... we are half way up and the guy turns to me and says " I once pushed a complete stranger off a ferese wheel."

Dead silence.....

I turned to him and said " I remember you."

actually, its a story from a famous comedian... but I tell that story a few times on the lift each year... especially to real old people. " Wait...You got pushed off!?!"
 
I went skiing with one of my friends during easter, and we got on the lift with one old man and his son. the old man and my friend sat in the middle. about half way up the hill the man is helping his son getting his gogles on, byt he drops them. the kid starts crying, and his father goes on about the gogles being old and shitty, and that he wont ski down there to get them. the kid keeps crying, and my friend puts his arm around the old guy and pokes the kid to get his attention. then he opens the strap of the old guys gogles, and they fall of the lift too! the old man gets really mad, but my friend tells him "I guess you'll pick up his glasses now, huh?".
 
there was some lifty at our mountain that was way chill one day and we'd had an on going snowball fight with him all day then one time my friend got off the lift and laid down on the ramp and waited for the lifty to carry him out of the way.
 
The first day out this past year we were riding up our 4 star and a n00b gaper was filming himself skiing, and he must have caught an edge, and fliped himself about a dozen times, launching his camera into a chairlift pole. It completely shattered his camera and scattered all of his ski gear and clothing on his face. p0wnd.
 
we were ripping around with this 8 or 9 year old kid who is so funny... just a punk. anyway hes on the chair ahead of us and he starts throwing snowballs and we had been filming him with a vx cuase he rips the park... just huge spreads off all the rail kickers... anyway launches a snowball and hits the camera square in the lense and i was recording... got the whole thing on tape. but it wasnt my camera so i dont have the technology to prove it.
 
me and a couple buddies were ripping down this side run fast then we should have been and we come up to a ski school going back and forth in front of us. My buddies manage to make it through without hitting anyone and i do the same until this little girl does a random cut at the last second in front of me, so rather then smoking her i open my legs and grab her underneath both arms so that she starts whipping down the hill with me. The instructor is having a shit-fit cuz she thinks that one of her kids is getting kidnapped so she is yelling "LET HER GO LET HER GO' so i do what she says by lifting her to the side of me while where still hauling, ask her if she can make a pizza after i let her go and then release her to probably the fastest she has ever gone. Don't worry she was alright just probably one of the sketchest pizzas going ridiculously fast i have even seen.

and i know i will be called a jackass for doing that but............i didn't want to lose the race against my friends......

Im going to hell arn't i?...
 
^^hahaha yea dude dont worry about it instructors shoundt be able to do that with threre groups and completely hog runs up plus u did the right thing instead of dominating her nice story though
 
so i was skiing in eldora at a race and i was on the lift behind this gay idiot racer named Aj oliver who tried to grab a gate that got loged in the wheels in the lift tower by some other newb coach. any way this kid grabbed the gate and it lifted him of the chair and he lost grip and fell 25 feet to his fat glutious maximus. hisfriend that was in the chair and he just laughed at him.
 
Riding up the lift at the beginning of the season with two kids who look to be about 12, small talk up the lift, out of nowhere:

Kid #1: So hey can I have your number?

(awkward silence)

Me: What?...your like 12

(awkward silence)

Kid #2: He's 12 and a HALF

sooo fucking awkward...

Yesterday I was riding with a snowboarder buddy, ended up getting onto a lift with some crazy asian gaper and his kid, when we were getting on the asian gaper sits on my friend starts yelling in chinese and flailing madly, he ended up pushing his kid off the lift. When the lift starts up again and everyone is back on, the gaper starts yelling angrily at his kid about how it was his fault, kid starts bawling. Crazy shit.
 
a couple years ago, this young gaper came up to me and asked me what the easiest way down was. I told him where to go and proceeded to head down the hill. I stopped midway down the hill because my friend was stopped also. The all of a sudden in the background i hear, starting soft and getting louder, "ahhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHH". Then i turn around and the same gaper i talked to before slams into my legs and takes my feet out from under me.

then i lost my breath which blew, but anyone watching that must have had a good laugh
 
one time i'm on the lift with my buddies zach and pat, and to my left is this asian chick, like 20ish. I was kinda congested so I lean forward and spit down, the wind all of a sudden picks up and blows it right back in her face, and this is early on in the lift so I can't just like unload right away, so I try to like apologize while my friends are next to me busting up laughing, and then when the lift finally gets to the top, the asian tries to be all friendly with me and like keep talking to me. I think she thought we were buddies since i spit on her. kinda random but funny
 
mine was like first chair up really early in the morning. have you ever tried licking a cold metal pole and it gets stuck? i kinda hit it on the bar, thats scary shit.
 
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