Jeff Foxworthy "You know you're a Coloradan when:

Mr.Huck

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1. You switch from 'Heat' to 'A/C' in one day.

2. You know what the 'Peoples Republic of Boulder' means.

3. Your sense of direction is: towards the mountains and away from the mountains.

4. You're a meat-eating vegetarian.

5. The bike on your car is worth more than your car and you have your own special bike lane.

6. You're able to drive 65 miles per hour through 13 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without even flinching.

7. You take your out-of-town guests to Casa Bonita even though you would never go there otherwise.

8. You think your major food groups are granola bars, tofu and Fat Tire Beer.

9. You design your kid's Halloween costumes to fit over a snowsuit.

10. You think that sexy lingerie is wool socks and flannel PJs.

11. You know all 4 seasons 'almost winter, winter, still winter and spring blizzards

12. You've been tear gassed in a riot to celebrate a CU/CSU victory.

13. You can never figure out why your out-of-town guests faint from altitude sickness on a picnic to the mountains.

14 You can drive over a 12,000-foot pass in 4 feet of snow, but can't get to work if there are 4 inches of snow.

15. You know the 'correct' pronunciation of Buena Vista.

16. When you visit friends at sea level, you can drink a case of beer and not get a buzz.

17. Your car insurance costs more than your car.

18 You have surge protectors on every outlet.

19. April showers bring May blizzards.

20. 'Timberline' is someplace you have actually been.

21. You know what a 'Chinook' is

22. You know what a 'Rocky Mountain Oyster' is.

23 You know what a 'fourteener' is.

24. .But you don't know what a 'turn signal' is.

25. A bear on your front porch doesn't bother you nearly as much as a Democrat in Congress does.

26. Your golf bag has a 9-iron, a 3-wood and a lightning rod.

27. People from out of state breathe 5 times as often as you do.

28. Having a Senator named Nighthorse doesn't seem strange.

29. Thunder has set off your car alarm.

30. You have an $800 stereo in your $300 truck.

31. You think a red light means 3 more cars can go.

32. Where we're going, we don't need roads!!

33. You know where the real 'South Park' is.

34. You can recognize the license plates of all 50 states on sight.

35. Driving directions usually include 'Go over_________ Pass.'

36. You've 'checked for ticks.

37. You've dressed in shorts, sandals, and a parka with a hood.

38. You've gone snow skiing in July and.........

39. You've played golf in January and.......

40. They were in the same year!

41. You've urinated on the Continental Divide just so it could run into both oceans.

42. You know what a down slope and an up slope weather pattern is.

43. And the most important: You get a certain feeling of satisfaction from knowing that California and Texas are both down stream.

44. You actually understand these jokes and send them to your Colorado friends.
 
WTF? This thread is currently blowing up on facebook.

I know you're out there.... who are you people and where did you come from?

PS - I love Colorado.
 
13469718:NewEscuelers said:
Thread has 5 (now 6) replies, and over 5k views.

Is this the most lopsided view-to-reply thread ever??

Look at this -
https://www.facebook.com/ColoradoSpringsHomes15/posts/925855587479288
https://www.facebook.com/gma1965/posts/1013422952024402
https://www.facebook.com/groups/CastleRockCommunity/permalink/10153103591997685/

And those just started yesterday. Someone must have stumbled in here from one of the other threads and somehow found themselves in Colorado regionals?

Weeeeird.
 
I have a hard time believing Jeff Foxworthy wrote this. I saw this posted online literally 10 years ago when I first created a facebook account.
 
13469870:jensen said:
I have a hard time believing Jeff Foxworthy wrote this. I saw this posted online literally 10 years ago when I first created a facebook account.

Yeah man....you're right. Jeff Foxworthy only started blowing up with "Are you smarter than a 5th grader" and that was only like 5 years ago.
 
The turn signal thing always gets me. I was going to write an "article" this winter about the governor banning the use of turn signals. 3 weeks later, absolutely nothing changed.

Can't wait to get back out there though.
 
13469943:CaptainObvious. said:
Yeah man....you're right. Jeff Foxworthy only started blowing up with "Are you smarter than a 5th grader" and that was only like 5 years ago.

Except for the Jeff Foxworthy show that came out in the '90's and had Larry the Cable Guy
 
13469974:ANDR01D said:
Yeah, its where I buy my weed!

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i know its nowhere near boulder but shoutout to RMR and Golden leaf in steamboat.

other than that, i feel like anyone who lives in/around mountains knows what a 14'er is, not some exclusive bullshit you dickheads made up, even though you do have some awesome mountains in that state.
 
13469867:DeebieSkeebies said:
Great, more awful facebook memes.

The funny part is looking at the post date and then noting that it blew up with Colorado moms recently. Like WTF?
 
subscribe for more top 10 buzzfeed facebook top 5 best top 15 lists on buzzfeed.com facebook middle aged mom meme buzzfeed top tens.
 
13470195:SFB said:
subscribe for more top 10 buzzfeed facebook top 5 best top 15 lists on buzzfeed.com facebook middle aged mom meme buzzfeed top tens.

Again, a thread for 2013 and we didn't share shit.

I would love to hear how in the fuck this got out there.
 
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