J skis ? A virginity protector or a ski ?

T

th3_h0mbr3z_666

New member
I have a friend who did incredible amounts of damage on and off the slopes. He was also known across the land for also packing serious heat in the ock department. Yet one day he was throwing down far to many hammers, deadset shit you not like hand dragging all over the joint bucarking style. You had to be there. Then out of no where he gets a pair of J skis. Not only did he look like a flat out virgin but his skiing basically fell off a cliff (get it). I initially was like in a positive tone, "hey dont worry beast you'll get back do doing those greasy hand drags". But i hate to say it he didn't. You think this J skis curse has ended here but hate to break it to you, your wrong. As we were hitting the showers after a shit day at park city his towel just slipped off and there i saw it. He went from packing, minimum 6 inch on the flop now deadset not even to be talked about, it was miniscule. Later that night after deleting and backspacing numerous cold ones it was looking up. He pulled a meaty fun loving rum pig yet he was only allowed try and tap any cervix's and just had to munch rugs because his prong wasnt gonna satisfy this large heifer's needs. As the following states you can clearly see that purchasing J skis will act as a very good virginity protector so if your of the age of 10 and not down to suck any toes and get freaky purchase some J skis.

Peace Hombres
 
topic:6petitevaj9 said:
I have a friend who did incredible amounts of damage on and off the slopes. He was also known across the land for also packing serious heat in the ock department. Yet one day he was throwing down far to many hammers, deadset shit you not like hand dragging all over the joint bucarking style. You had to be there. Then out of no where he gets a pair of J skis. Not only did he look like a flat out virgin but his skiing basically fell off a cliff (get it). I initially was like in a positive tone, "hey dont worry beast you'll get back do doing those greasy hand drags". But i hate to say it he didn't. You think this J skis curse has ended here but hate to break it to you, your wrong. As we were hitting the showers after a shit day at park city his towel just slipped off and there i saw it. He went from packing, minimum 6 inch on the flop now deadset not even to be talked about, it was miniscule. Later that night after deleting and backspacing numerous cold ones it was looking up. He pulled a meaty fun loving rum pig yet he was only allowed try and tap any cervix's and just had to munch rugs because his prong wasnt gonna satisfy this large heifer's needs. As the following states you can clearly see that purchasing J skis will act as a very good virginity protector so if your of the age of 10 and not down to suck any toes and get freaky purchase some J skis.

Peace Hombres
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Epic.
 
Fuck thanks for posting this after I bought six pairs of whippits.

**This post was edited on Nov 29th 2017 at 1:19:57pm
 
13861514:Mr.Bishop said:
I prefer the term switch.
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"I do mean the thousands of people who have ditched this site over the years. They are many of the people who I have painstakingly interviewed in a mixture of manners. They include hundreds of today's crop of professional skiers and industry people who grew up on Newschoolers but have abandoned it. It is the people who left who complain most heavily about the shitty posts on the site, especially when they are in otherwise productive chatter about skiing. It is the main source they give for leaving."

For real though, you are all up in my DMs basically telling me to stop trolling and leaving stupid comments because its destroying this site and the reason why "thousands of people have ditched this site over the years". And then you pop in for your quarterly thread contribution... and this is what you choose to quote as "epic"? Fucks wrong witchu son?
 
If I only bring out my Js from time to time, is my virginity only being protected when I ski them, or is it just a consequence of ownership?.... asking for a friend
 
13861559:Park_Ranger said:
"I do mean the thousands of people who have ditched this site over the years. They are many of the people who I have painstakingly interviewed in a mixture of manners. They include hundreds of today's crop of professional skiers and industry people who grew up on Newschoolers but have abandoned it. It is the people who left who complain most heavily about the shitty posts on the site, especially when they are in otherwise productive chatter about skiing. It is the main source they give for leaving."

For real though, you are all up in my DMs basically telling me to stop trolling and leaving stupid comments because its destroying this site and the reason why "thousands of people have ditched this site over the years". And then you pop in for your quarterly thread contribution... and this is what you choose to quote as "epic"? Fucks wrong witchu son?
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Its the complicated difference between funny trolling and shitty trolling. Its a subtle difference to the average person, but makes all the difference in the world.

This was a funny troll. NSG turned into Shitty trolling.

13861568:hot.pocket said:
I prefer the term ass first.
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Ass first dub 12....

I like it.
 
Well...this is a thing. I have no clue what's going on...and I old now, or... At least I got a laugh, I guess?
 
13861559:Park_Ranger said:
"I do mean the thousands of people who have ditched this site over the years. They are many of the people who I have painstakingly interviewed in a mixture of manners. They include hundreds of today's crop of professional skiers and industry people who grew up on Newschoolers but have abandoned it. It is the people who left who complain most heavily about the shitty posts on the site, especially when they are in otherwise productive chatter about skiing. It is the main source they give for leaving."

For real though, you are all up in my DMs basically telling me to stop trolling and leaving stupid comments because its destroying this site and the reason why "thousands of people have ditched this site over the years". And then you pop in for your quarterly thread contribution... and this is what you choose to quote as "epic"? Fucks wrong witchu son?
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You definetly own a pair j skis, it's ok don't beat up on yourself. Own it
 
13861695:6petitevaj9 said:
You definetly own a pair j skis, it's ok don't beat up on yourself. Own it
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again, asking for a friend, whats the best thing a jskis owner can do to cure themself
 
13861695:6petitevaj9 said:
You definetly own a pair j skis, it's ok don't beat up on yourself. Own it
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I've got some 2011 Volkl Walls chilling under my bed. They are absolutely beat to shit from when I was in college. Want them for free?
 
This should be in Gear Talk, great review. I'll be sure to steer clear of the JSkis and keep my porkstick from turning into a chub.
 
13861404:suup said:
/CLAIM
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Allow me to set the scene, It was a chilly fall night, I had just returned home with my lady and we settled down on the sofa to watch Moana, as is completely understandable watching an adolescent Hawaiian girl sing about the ocean got us both pretty turned on. I started to kiss her passionately and one thing led to another and 4.7 inches later, I was balls deep for my first time. I remember looking up at one point, completely lost in the moment, and my gaze landed on my jskis Jerry of the day collab all plays sitting in corner. The message on the bottom looked back at me reminding me what I needed to do. RESPECT THE SEND I grabbed that hair and slapped her across the face with my dick and finished all over her face. I cannot remember that night without seeing my jskis. Thank you Jason Levinthal
 
13861619:Mr.Bishop said:
Its the complicated difference between funny trolling and shitty trolling. Its a subtle difference to the average person, but makes all the difference in the world.

This was a funny troll. NSG turned into Shitty trolling.

.
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Good thing I'm always funny and never on NSG :)
 
13861733:J_S said:
again, asking for a friend, whats the best thing a jskis owner can do to cure themself
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In 7 years on the forum, I've never seen so many people helping their friends with gear choices...
 
13861471:WONKEYKONG said:
Fuck thanks for posting this after I bought six pairs of whippits.

**This post was edited on Nov 29th 2017 at 1:19:57pm
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Just bought 3pairs of vacations. What do I do know?
 
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