in the vein of crazy christian websites...

1. If he tells your that you are hot...

Tell him God made you hot.

2. If he wants to hold your hand...

Give him a Bible.

3. If he tries to get closer...

Tell him the Holy Spirit is wooing him.

4. If he asks to pay for dinner...

Remind him that Jesus also paid a debt He did not owe!

5. If he reaches his arm around you...

Tell him that nobody will ever be as close to you as Jesus is.

6. If he tries to kiss you...

Remind him that a kiss killed your Savior.

7. If he asks to come inside...

Ask him if he has asked Jesus to come inside his heart.

8. If he tells you he loves you...

Tell him that Jesus loves him.

9. If he gets angry that you won't put out...

Clarify to him that W.W.J.D. does NOT mean 'Who would Jesus Do.'

10. After you dump him...

Tell him that Jesus Christ will never leave or forsake him

*****
If it aint Gorilla, it aint Steeze

'i want to stand in the middle of one of my old highschools hall ways with my big puffy snow pants and skis durring when classes change.' - Misty7
 
It really isn't that funny

*****
If it aint Gorilla, it aint Steeze

'i want to stand in the middle of one of my old highschools hall ways with my big puffy snow pants and skis durring when classes change.' - Misty7
 
no... its weird.

Mercy's eyes are blue

When she places them in front of you

Nothing holds a roman candle to

The solemn warmth you feel inside

 
10. After you dump him...

Tell him that Jesus Christ will never leave or forsake him

haha

,',',',',',',',',',',',',',',',',',
 
Haha. I found it pretty hilarous. I couldn't quite figure out if it was for real or not.. Also on the front page there's

''Hello, my name is Tamara!... What you probably don't know is that I'm hot.''

and what was this one all about..

''6. If he tries to kiss you...

Remind him that a kiss killed your Savior. ''

 
ok, in Bible times a kiss was a friendly gretting, even among the same gender. Judas (who betrayed Christ) told the scribes and the Pharasees (the religious leaders of the day, who wanted Jesus dead) that the man he kissed was the Christ.

as for these 'rules of dating to save' the verse 'be not unequally yolked together with unbelievers' comes to mind. the Bible states that Christians are not to marry, much less date an unbeliever, for many reasons which i will not get into.

not all Christians are as ignorant of the world around them and (apparently) their own religion

-Joe
_______________________________________
Official NS marketing consultant

Help me get a free ipod please!?!?!http://www.freeiPods.com/?r=9734247
 
Heres one I found on an Islam website

1. If he tells your that you are hot...

Tell him Allah will smite you if you do not give in to his demands

2. If he wants to hold your hand...

You better or you may be executed in a soccer stadium

3. If he tries to get closer...

Do not tell him he smells like goat shit

4. If he asks to pay for dinner...

Remind him that camel testicles do not cost much, and you can split the bill

5. If he reaches his arm around you...

Tell him that nobody will ever be as close to you as Allah is.

6. If he tries to kiss you...

First remove your burqa or head dress

7. If he asks to come inside...

Tell him that we are already inside, its just a dirt floor

8. If he tells you he loves you...

Then consider yourself the luckiest muslim women in the world

9. If he gets angry that you won't put out...

You better start undressing or else an AK 47 round waits for you

-------------------
'If only real chicks when down this easy' Comic Book Guy
 
^ one of the best, and truest, things i've seen all day

'Everybody's somebody at Wendy's..unless you're a midget!' -SpinninMacKinnon

'if someone's standing in the way of your shot you can kick them in the balls repeatedly until they move or die' - SteveXs2

There's Nothing To It But To Do It.

-Joel
 
Wow...christians always there for a good laugh

word

HAHAHA YOU BITCHES MY DADS LAWYER, MICHAEL J KAUFMANN IS ALREDY INVESTIGATING LATS POSTS ON NS AND WILL TAKE LEGAL ACTION

APPARENTLY I CAN ALSO SUE NS for condoning harrassment AND SHUT THIS FUCKIN SITE DOWN! -ATLANTASKI
 
Definitely a joke. It's great.

'The true measure of a man is how he treats another who can do absolutely nothing for him.'
-Samuel Johnson
 
I wouldn't put it past some christian chicks to say that

-------------------
'If only real chicks when down this easy' Comic Book Guy
 
the church? could you be a bit more spacific? theres lots you know.

Mercy's eyes are blue

When she places them in front of you

Nothing holds a roman candle to

The solemn warmth you feel inside

 
Yes, and please don't confuse 'The Church' with an individual who has some form of spirituality in their life, though he may belong to a certain church.

'The true measure of a man is how he treats another who can do absolutely nothing for him.'
-Samuel Johnson
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top