I sincerely apologize to newschoolers for this thread.

T

TheBigApple

Active member
I am in need of guidance from multiple 13/14 year olds. The few people 18+ that actually know about this stuff, it would be greatly appreciated if you gave your two cents.

My story:

I am failing out of university. My parents are both engineers and we are upper middle class I would say, no debt, and a big house with a nice cabin at a ski town in B.C. Obviously my dad thinks I would make a great engineer, and he is probably right, but I have no interest in the field, as broad as it is. I went to college this year with the expectation of making new friends, having alot of sex with easy college girls, enjoying the program I was in, being able to get drunk whenever without hassle from my parents, do what I want, gamble online when I want, go to bed when I want, do homework when I want, and do what I want.

It met all of my expectations, although the sex can be messy due to the very nature of the college attitude. I was expecting to be able to easily sit down and focus because I knew a glamorous career in a cubicle making a starting salary awaited, and then I realized, how is that worth it at all? Why do I want to work? Then life's questions hit me like a ton of bricks, and school went by the wayside while I just relaxed partied, skipped most of my classes, got high, and everything but focusing on school. I still wrote my tests, did my assignments, but put a really half ass job into everything. I also spent all my money and had to borrow $1500+ from parents/credit cards for second semester.

Here I sit faced with life ahead of me, yet I am still an immature fuck, and am smart enough to realize I am not ready to set out on the adventure that we call life. I don't want to work and then just be old and retired and die. I want to make a difference, have a legacy, bring change to this fucked up society and earth. Then I think, it's all going to be for naught, the sun will implode eventually and life on earth with cease to exist, actually it will cease to exist long before the sun implodes likely from global freezing, or a collision with something or god know what. So the point of making a legacy and bringing about change seems pointless. Perhaps I will live pay check to paycheck in a small mountain town and live where I love doing what I love all the time. That seems the most logical.

Then their is the issue of me wanting to have a wife and kids, so then I look back at taking a year off from school and living just to work and ski, and then going to a different university after that and finishing my business degree and starting that glamorous cooperate career I mentioned previously. In this instance however, I will be two years behind, and for four years I will be away from the most amazing friends I have ever been given the opportunity to know. I don't know If I could deal with that. I know I would make new friends at the new university, but it just wouldn't seem right, or maybe I would meet the love of my life and all the dots would connect as they say they will.

Each day I look around me and I am in awe at how truly amazing everything is. Technology, life, love, family, nature, time, the universe, friends, food, our brain and it's abilities. It truly is amazing, and sadly in a hundred years, 99.999% of everyone alive today will be dead. I just don't know.

I just don't know.
 
i hear ya.

i am 22 and facing the same shit. Last year i took a trip around the world on a ship while attending classes on it. It is called semester at sea. I would strongly recommend this to you and anyone else. Gives you a great perspective on the world and if your thinking about trying to change it this will give you a good place to start and just an overall pheonomenal experience all together. This might not be the response you were looking for...but check it out anyways
 
I don't think a whole lot of people are excited about the careers college is preparing them for. I'm going for my MBA not because I get a hard on when I think about working for some huge corporation, but because I want a safe back-up plan. I don't intend to spend my life in a cubicle, I don't even really intend to make a career out of working for anyone, yet I'd always like to have that open to fall back on.

And take at least one winter off to live in a mountain town for sure, it's an amazing experience.

Oh and don't forget Ski Basin Management, there's a field where you could apply a business degree, make decent money and still get to live in a mountain town and ski.
 
wow that was deep , so many life questions in there , it really makes you think. it seems like youve thought about the outcomes of every situation and you need to choose the idea you like the best , and only you , not your parents, or friends. I like the idea of living paycheck to paycheck in a small mountain town, but thats just me.
 
my brother ended up failing out of michigan state..

he went on to graduate from cornell and is now a vice president of a section at GE.
 
Man you just described my first year of college to a T. Except I am really interested in what I'm studying but I'm just apathetic about it. I don't know what I want to do right now, and I plan on not knowing for a while.
 
im going through the same thing right now. freshman year in college and my grades suck. i dont want to work and i dont want to grow up and have to work. i started out exercise science and i realize i hate science which sucks after i have like 30 science credits. fuck. i was considering study abroad like the other guy above me did. but now im pretty sure im going to change my major to something i find interesting instead of stuff that im just good at.
 
It truly is amazing, and sadly in a hundred years, 99.999% of everyone alive today will be dead. I just don't know.

I have honestly never thought about that.......Holy Shit!
 
here is the way i look at it i graduated college in 2001 i was on the five year plan and not really tring to hard i grad with a 2.6 gpa. got out gort a good job make enough dough to do all things i want ( i rocked out with my cock out most of college and a lot i dont even remeber except it ruled. any way i am glad i have a good job now i can go where i want when i want ski locally and take about 3 extended weekend trips at least a year it is nice to have money. i regret not being able to do the ski bum thing cause it would have been fun but not i do the lets go to tahoe, or jackson hole, or steamboat next weekend and its is pretty satisfing
 
I'm 25, this is my first year back in a traditional school setting since high school. I spent a lot of my time trying to be as "punk rock" as humanly possible when I was younger. Family, school, health, and people close to me took a back seat to my social life... I even stopped skiing. My social life included drinking as much as humanly possible, getting into fights, and going to punk rock shows. All I have to show for it is a ton of tattoos.

I can't say I regret any of it. Because at that point in my life I really needed to rebel and go against the grain, and I learned a lot about my self and what I really value in life. I'm crushing school right now; 3.7 GPA, honors society and shit.
 
Well, first off on the topic of school, it is not for everyone. Obviously it depends on what you want to do with your life, and for better or for worse YOU are the only one who can make that choice because you know yourself, your ambitions, your goals, and your passions better than anyone else. So maybe you take a little time off from school to re-evaluate things and look at what you really want to do (because at the end if the day you need to bring in money but you also need to love what you do) and then go do it. Living on your own, independent from a college for example, can be difficult for someone recently out of highschool, but it can help you more clearly discover who you are and what you would like to do in your life's future as well as teaching many valuable lessons along the way. You might not think you are ready, but I am willing to bet you are. That doesn't mean that it won't be difficult, or scary, or intimidating, but i am sure you are capable if you believe you are and if you want it bad enough.

The bottom line is at the end of the day the choice needs to be yours, not your moms, not your dads, not your friends but yours. And you can choose to tough it out going through a shitty program just to get to a well paying job that you don't really like and then live for the weekends, or, you can find something that you love to do, whether it pays 40,000 a year or 240,000 a year, if it requires a degree or doesn't require a degree. I know that for me personally I would rather make enough money to live a modest life style and love what I am doing than make bank but loath going to work every day.

As for the whole philisophical thing as far as "What is the point? We are all gonna die sometime." well, what if everyone took that same approach? Nothing would get done in this world. Henry Ford wouldn't have started a mighty car company, Michael Jordan wouldn't be the greatest basketball player in the world, hell we would probably all still be living in caves if we had no ambition.

The fact is, we have all been given the gift and opportunity of life, It is a limited amount of time that we have on this Earth and in this world, infact we do not know how limited, and it only makes sense to use our time to the best of our ability. Sure you can sit around, watch tv, get high, get wasted, go party, but at the end of the day is that really what you want your life to be about (by "you" I mean the general mass, but it could be you as well)? I think we have a great opportunity to live full, healthy, productive lives and to not do so, would be to squander a great opportunity. Sure you are gonna die sometime, but others will live on, for how long only God knows. But why not go out, seek your passions, do what you love, and try to make a positive impact on the world? I am willing to bet that you make some good friends, achieve some great things, and have a damn good time doing it.

And, the final thought, as far as getting behind in school and being years begind your friends, it all dpends on how you look at it. If you are going to school for something you really have a passion for and really want a career in, then I am pretty sure you will mkae it through school. Sure you might not like it at the time, but if you have high goals, it is gonna take some hard work, doing some things you don't want to do, and some perseverance to reach those goals. No one said it would come easy, but if you want it bad enough then you can get it. And once you get out of school (if that is the path you take), then you will be ready to go to seek out that job/career you are so stoked on. In some repects you may actually be ahead of your friends because you are fresh out of school knowing exactly what you want to go do and being excited to do it.

So that is my advice post of the day, actually probably the month or maybe the year, but I feel, at least I hope, I did a decent job in trying to help you out.
 
I understand where youre coming from but that's just life man, take it one step at a time. If you end up not liking the way things turn out, its never too late to change things.

be an engineer and see how you like it. if you don't, change careers. I know that might be a waste of a lot of schooling but its better to find something you like.
 
whats most important is what makes you happy. dont ever lose sight of that. find something to do with your life. but at the same time worrying about shit doesnt really help. what youre experiencing right now is life. the unknowns out there are what keep things interesting. someday youll look back at yourself and be totally amazed at how you accomplished things.
 
just curious, you were engineering, so I thought there might be a possibility you go to UVic, same school as me.
 
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My friend your dilemmas sound similar to the thoughts that have crossed my mind, here are some remedies that i have contemplated, and some suggestions that have worked for me.

what i suggest you do is get involved with volunteer work (i'm looking into joining the peace corps) It'll show you that there is a lot more out there in life than just the fancy material world of the US. And you'll see how much of an impact on someone elses life you can have-- making things for the better.

you may not be written about in the record books as the greatest human alive, but you will change a few peoples lives, and you'll be able to see it happen, and this will be all that matters.

i've also gotten involved with the youth: working at a summer camp, or at an elementry school will not only allow you to find your inner child again but it also will alow you to plant many seeds of inspiration in the younger generations. It's pretty crazy how much younger kids look up to you as if the fact that you can grow facial hair automatically makes you the wisest person in the world and that you'll have answers to any problem.

not only do you provide a positive environment for the kids to grow in, but they also give you the oppertunity to grow and learn about yourself (even if they are completely oblivious to how much they teach you.)

I want to share with you a little anecdote about a speaker who came to a camp staff training, the speaker had everyone in the room, about 150 + of us write down on a piece of paper a few things that we were proud of ourselves for, and a few things that we needed to 'work on'

(right now maybe you can think of what you'd have written down)

for the most part people would write how they are a good listener, or were honest, and how they needed to work on their short temper, or their communication skills.

Out of everyone in the room one person had written 'spealing' (spelling) as something they needed to work on -- the point being that grades really don't matter in the grand scheme of things. College may be important for some peoples paths of life, but for others it's completely unnessisary, and for others going to college right after highschool just isn't the right time. Basically you know inside what is important in being a decent human being, and that those qualities are what really matter.

I wish you good luck, and i'm sure that good things will find you soon.
 
I am going to Uvic next year or the year after I think. Probably take a year off and dick around and then go to Uvic in business/start in sociology i guess that is what they do there.
 
^^ Jibjib, you are so on point its scary. Im in the middle of making life changing decisions, what course to do at university, and im torn between the: Become a ski instructor, be poor, but enjoy it. OR Go to university get a degree, get a decent job, moderate money, family.

And i think i've realized, if i go to university, get a degree that means i have a back up. Then hopefully take a year or two out, live in Canada and teach. Then try and settle down.

I think you just have to grin and bear university while you can, you want to be able to have options in the future
 
I was kind of the same way my freshman year, I'm a sophomore now. I think one of the best things you can do is take a wide range of classes, and maybe you'll find one that you really like and then you can turn it into your major. Thats what happened to me last year, I took one history class and after some serious thought decided that I really want to major in history. Finding out what you don't want to do is one of the best ways to find out what you do want to do. Like someone above me said, I'd suggest going abroad for a semester or year. It will be one of the best experiences of your life and it might give you some direction as to what you want to do.

I wouldn't worry to much about not knowing what you want to do and freaking out about it because, although not everyone will admit it, it happens to just about everyone. Its part of life and you'll get past it with time.
 
Thank you est, that was kind. I was thinking about going into teaching so I could help this world by inspiring and encouraging open mindedness and educating them on the real world.
 
Its tough, not enough people focus on teaching whats really important... just remeber that they'll be young and if you give them too much of the real world it can get scarry real quick!

 
you just gotta find your own path. it can be hard, and it may not always seem like the right thing to do, but you just gotta do what makes you happy. right now im trying to decide between going to a pretty decent school that i have been going to for a year and hate, for free on a ski scholarship, or working my butt off to pay for school, getting pretty much the same education, but being in a place i want to be, with people i want to be with. i still havent been able to decide. i think i should do what makes me happy, but the security of free school and a good job when i get out is extremely tempting.
 
This year I took, chemistry, physics, calculus, statistics, geology, geography, anthropology, sociology, philosophy, and economics. Pretty well rounded, sociology and anthropology are sweet.
 
life is a bitch, I see aspiration in your statement. I also see your confusion about the world. It is important to have a goal, persue something you truly love. Money isnt everything because the pain of waking up and knowing you have to go to your fucking hurts more than a broken arm. I have found my path, I am studying to be come a marine engineer.

Remember that you will not die tomorrow, a job can wait. Its best to stay low for a few years, discover what you love then give it all in college and university.

 
i was at a performing arts show last night and had to rip out a portion of the program to keep this quote...

Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail - Emerson
 
ok heres what i hear and take into account alll the time....but first lemme tell you a story of this kid for some motivation.

my dad's faternity (sp?) brother, he only majored in mathematics. he went to WVU good school but easy to get in you know of course. well later on, he ended up being the president of Oracle. he took it from 1 billion to 10 billion. he sold his 50 million (might be more) shares of 20$ each. do the math thats 1 billion dollars he has in his pocket. now he has a plane, huge houses ON GREAT SKI RESORTS, family, and now he owns a good chunk of google.

now if u ask me, thats dope. its both what you want. house on resort, and family to share it with(if you get married and have kids that is).

and about the WVU, its good college.... i bet 65% people or maybe mroe would say that school sucks cuz its so easy to get in. *NOTE: its not what the school makes of you, its what YOU make of the school.*

so if i were you, i would try your best and do your best and youll have them both. what you want.
 
i am almost 22 now and i will graduate this year with my associates of Accounting and Associates of Business/Entrepreneurship. College has been hard, but if if you are passionate about your degree you can adapt and overcome.

Now, in your case, i would suggest what some other people have said. take some time off, go travel the world (if you can), go to school in another country, or just live life. There is so much to this world to see(outside of the U.S.). France and Italy are very interesting places.

You are old enough to see how the world really works, meaning it works differently than we thought it did when we were kids, at least i do. The world can be depressing sometimes and can get you down, but ONLY if you let it. Find something you love to do and stick with it.

you can always change your mind, haha

good luck
 
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Really,

I think you should find something that you are really passionate about and pursue it. As you said you love skiing, then look into ski resort managment. Don't bother wasting your time on something you don't want to do for the rest of your life, life is too short.

 
man i feel the same.. just try to think for a while about what you really want to get out of life and focus on the positives that are in the present.. try not to focus tomuch on the future because wats ahead is ineviatable and if school is not for you and engineering is just has to many barriers and you would prefer to do something that involves thinking about life and people and wat you enjoy which i think is skiing... theres a good career kind of life book callled "DO WHAT YOU ARE" it kind of helps you find out wat kind of person you are and explains ur feeling and what you are meant to do not forced.. to do its a good book thats not very long cause once you figure out ur TYPE u just go to that section.. it helped me discover why i behave the way i do and what i should do with my life.. hope i could help bro
 
I find it so stupid that you have to get a Master's Degree in order to live happily, and comfortably these days. It makes me hate school so fucking much.
 
man im in the exact same boat im still in highschool but im already questioning the importance of college i want something to fall back on but at the same time i want to have fun well i can not just go to school my whole childhood to learn about a job ill have until im 60 when i wont be able to do anything i can now.
 
if you dont want to do that and work in a cubicle then dont. do whatever job you would be happy dong ,no matter how much you make.
 
From what I can see, your outlook on the future is too fucking depressing. You want to leave a legacy, but oh wait, in a hundred years maybe well all be dead, or maybe it'll be 5 billion years. You can't control these things, so don't even worry about it. If you want to leave something behind, then shit, do it, the world might blow up before you get the chance so maybe you will literally die trying. Ha, wouldn't that be sweet irony. For me, my first year of college was amazing, but I took a different approach than you. In fact, the complete opposite. I am a huge fucking try-hard in school. Maybe it isn't for you, but I haven't had any stress problems and find nothing but fulfillment in my studies. Hell, maybe college isnt for you, maybe the only legacy you need to leave is ski tracks that last 1 day. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Just chill out, find a job you love, and try not to lose yourself in all the other shit that is going on around you.
 
seriously just take a year off...to just think. i wansnt quite sure or understood if you have allready taken a year off...but seriously consider it. finish college man. it will be worth it. no joke.
 
Thank you everyone, I guess I really should follow my dreams, and my gut.

You can't connect the dots looking forward, you just have to trust yourself and then looking back, you will be able to connect each life changing event into one incredible series that lead you to where you are at that moment.

That being said, it is best to take it one step at a time, which is what you guys are saying, and so that is what I shall do, one step at a time.

The short term plan, haul ass for the last month so I can at least keep it above 500 (pass more than half my courses), and then work for a few months, save some money, move to B.C. and live there indefinitely exploring nature, and skiing. It just seems so scary to leave it all behind.

 
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