I hate my damn roomate

I think you've gotta just deal with it.

'as long as i dont leave my skates on the floor, which i do in spite of that' (you can't afford a $1 extension cord with 4 jacks on it?!) and all the other shit you're saying makes it seem like you're just trying to piss him off. basically just do nothing to piss him off. he might stop, if you're doing shit JUST to piss him off then maybe he's doing shit to JUST piss you off! maybe the late nights on the computer are his way of telling you something. but yes. if you've gotta wear headphones he should too, and all the rest. But mostly make that point obvious to him and don't just bitch about it to other people hoping the problem will solve itself because whatever you're doing to make shit better isn't working right

- Mike

'i'm guessing that when you say 'drinking', you mean you snuck one of your dad's O'Doules out of the fridge.

and by 'had sex' you mean 'beat off to an episode of The View'.' -Str8LaceFan
 
if it means anything...i just sent him 20+ emails about viagra, gay sex and weight loss programs...

'if the president is anything like you, atlantaski, i hope someone smacks him with a golf club and shits in his mouth.' CrystalNeedsSomething...

BUM LOVING FOR LIFE!

'If i was a slutty white chick id rather have a 14 inch beast in my twat than a 6 inch white man cock' -Lateralis
 
talk to your RA's about getting a new roommate. tell them he smells and the stench of him is so overhelming you have to sleep in someone elses room.

or better yet, invite an RA into your room when he's acting like a prick so they can expirience it first hand.

pretty much the best thing you can do is switch rooms and leave him to his misserable life. and when you move out, steal some of his shit.

**Proud member of the d-loc fanclub**

d-loc's wit & wisdom at its best.
 
lights out at 3am ? baaahahahahhaha thats so classic for a college man thats funny.

___________________

Josh Barilar

Sportin' the bath robe steeze.

since 1984

NO BRIAN, its I before E except after C, an when sounding like a in a neighbor in weigh and on weekends and holidays and all through out may and you'll always be wrong no MATTER WHAT YOU SAY!

You all take luck now! You take luck and care
 
irishdrink87, this is the only time i'll say i love you, cause honestly, i dont, but thats hilarious

ive just decided to ignore him, and not piss him off intentionally, which i havent been doing. but, im just gonna chew him out the next time he goes over the edge

-Joe

______________________________________

'Really, I gotta say that I'm glad you exist, 'cause if there wasn't there'd be noone to make fun of and diss.'

Solider in the NS ARMY

Rollers of NS unite!!!

603 for life

I'm conservative, just so you all know.

Member Number: 5172

Golden Wheel Chair Award 2004-09-21

 
dump in mymouth and get a new room

-let people do what they want, ski how you want, make whoever you want your role model its your choice

-i love to ski, so should you, its fun, try it sometime

-thats what the internet is for anonymously slandering people-jason lee

 
i mean his

-let people do what they want, ski how you want, make whoever you want your role model its your choice

-i love to ski, so should you, its fun, try it sometime

-thats what the internet is for anonymously slandering people-jason lee

 
does no one know the powdered milk in the bed sheets trick? It works better when its warmer, but basically the body sweats while sleeping, which disolves the powdered milk, and it then gets into the pores. And yes this does stink rather badly, and does not wash off easily. There is truth to the Mallrat's line 'a small price to pay for the smiting of ones enemy'.

However, honestly, you might just be best off putting up with it. Obviously don't let him walk all over you, and don't put up with his shit, but be quick to hand it back. Another thing to keep in mind if he's using/abusing your stuff, see if you can get a lock-box or a lock and figure out how to lock it up (like in a bureau or something). That way if he breaks into it, you have him for destruction of your property, chances are that doesn't fly.

life is too short to have any regrets
 
Trick the bitch into fighting with you, if he throws the first punch its his ass. Oh yeah just call him a bitch whenever you can, it'll probably push him over the edge, ask him about all the girls he hasnt gotten with this year. And advice for you man, stand up for yourself dude. obviously if he's gonna fuck with you, give it right back 2fold mang.

'Dont sweat the petty stuff

Dont pet the sweaty stuff.'
 
emty his expensive colone, and piss in the bottle. make sure to drink a ton of water so its not all yellow and shit. that way, he'll go to shower himself in 100 dollar cologne, and you will basiclly be pissing all over him.

I still just have no idea how you can mistake your dick and a chicken neck, let alone not realize what you are doing. -manus

I.L.I.A.G.A CREW!

I drink pepto bismal like its water.. -PJO
 
How about being nice to the point of being annoying? Take out his trash. Vaccum the room repeatedly. Ask him if there is anything you can do for him, and if he wants to talk about his problems. Along with that you just need another small harmless thing to send him over the edge. Rhyme all of your sentences. The goal is to make him hit you.

_
 
Get a batch out in his pillow case.

__________________

'it isn't really even that bad, the whole sticking something in your ass. you cant really feel it.' - Alpentalik
 
plant some drug shit around his stuff, then complain that all he does is smoke weed in the room...should get him kicked out

The troll stole my Santa!
 
have noisy sex

To understand mankind, we must first understand the word. We can break the word down into two sub-words, 'mank' and 'ind'.What these two words mean is a mystery, just like mankind itself.
 
rub it in his face

To understand mankind, we must first understand the word. We can break the word down into two sub-words, 'mank' and 'ind'.What these two words mean is a mystery, just like mankind itself.
 
the fact that you can get a girl, or the used condom

To understand mankind, we must first understand the word. We can break the word down into two sub-words, 'mank' and 'ind'.What these two words mean is a mystery, just like mankind itself.
 
teabag, or the 'true' wet willy

To understand mankind, we must first understand the word. We can break the word down into two sub-words, 'mank' and 'ind'.What these two words mean is a mystery, just like mankind itself.
 
im just gonna work on handing shit back to him, although i have to say you guys are horrible. im glad youre not my room mates

-Joe

______________________________________

'Really, I gotta say that I'm glad you exist, 'cause if there wasn't there'd be noone to make fun of and diss.'

Solider in the NS ARMY

Rollers of NS unite!!!

603 for life

I'm conservative, just so you all know.

Member Number: 5172

Golden Wheel Chair Award 2004-09-21

 
I say poop in his bed. . . that'll teach him.

I went to a small christian college too, and my sophomore year, my roomate was a moron. He was one of those guys that was obsessed with counterstrike. Now I'm not saying its a bad game or anything, but this dude had a problem. He'd stay up all night playing it. Now granted he wore his headphones which I commended him for. . but he'd play with his microphone, and start yelling at his teamates at 3 am. and when he'd die he'd throw stuff and slam his hands down on the desk. That would really piss me off while I was trying to sleep. so I pooped in his bed. we're not really friends anymore.

 
another idea, that was actually done at my college. (the guys who did it got in trouble) . . make him some brownies.. . .but lace the brownies with viagra and laxatives. the results are pretty cool.

 
Pretend your his friend, get him drunk and then throw him out of your room, pile all his shit in a heap on the front lawn and set fire to it. Give him some marshmallows and tell him to toast them while watching his shit burn

___________________________

''Shake it like a polaroid picture''

 
haha, i just sent him 20 more.

5 about viagra

5 about SUPERviagra

5 entitled 'get a larger member'

and 5 from some guy called Alfredo Jack

'if the president is anything like you, atlantaski, i hope someone smacks him with a golf club and shits in his mouth.' CrystalNeedsSomething...

BUM LOVING FOR LIFE!

'If i was a slutty white chick id rather have a 14 inch beast in my twat than a 6 inch white man cock' -Lateralis
 
What you really wanna do is to take shit onto something like a piece of cardboard and then pick it up and put into the freezer. Give it a day or two to get fully solid and all good and froze. Then grab a cheesegrater, retrieve the shit and grate it all over his floor and into all his drawers and stuff. As it thaws our, it smells really bad, good times!

~~Phunkin Phatt Phreerider~~

#Cut the Jibba Jabba Crazy Fools! Start Skiing!#

*Be greatful, everyday, for snow, mountains, gravity and skiing*

@Talent Is Important, But Image Is God!@

%Jesus Is My Homeboy%
 
^yeah, but this requires you to

1. touch your own shit (unless you're wearing gloves or something)

2. waste a perfectly good cheese grater

3. you still have to live in the place if the guy moves out, so the whole place'll smell like your ass.

_____________________

'yeah line stuff blows, i got a pair of the new pollards and once i took the wrapper off the spontaneously combusted' - schlonginator
 
Just be an asshole to him. Guys are assholes to chicks and they seem to get what they want, should work on your flaming friend too.

Oh snap Whistler rocked my socks.
 
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