I frostbit my wiener

F

frostedTip

Member
THIS IS NOT A DRILL. I was lapping the park not a care in the world the rest of me wasn't really even cold, when I noticed a great pain. Apparently, at that specific point the layers all press against each other meaning there is no air space for insulation and the wind cuts right through. Combined with the dangle factor meaning it's away from any body heat, the results were disastrous. I would describe the pain upon thawing as the same pain as when you thaw out frozen fingers, only worse, cause there's an added element that feels like you got kicked in the balls.

So how to prevent this? I hope to never experience this pain again. Is there any wisdom in the classic cock sock?
 
This reminds me of my foolproof way to get your wiener touched.

Step 1: invite girl (or guy, I don't judge) into the backcountry

Step 2: say you're going to take a piss

Step 3: trigger small avalanche with preplaced explosives to slide over you whilst urinating

Step 4: say you have frostbite on your wiener and need their warmth to save it

Step 5: ????

Step 6: Profit
 
Yet another opportunity to proudly walk in and buy magnums. Imagine sitting on the lift and pulling out your magnum cock sock in front of some ladies ?

Can I wear my weiner on the outside then? And hopefully they make an “armored” version

14224783:Bended_Toenail said:
instead of another shitty T-shirt company, someone should man up and make an insulated condom.
Click to expand...
 
Buy a condom.

Buy a pack of handwarmers.

Cut open handwarmer and pour contents into condom.

Stick dick in condom.

???

Profit.
 
Can I follow you in? I’m unsure of the speed needed for this....

14224806:1337 said:
Buy a condom.

Buy a pack of handwarmers.

Cut open handwarmer and pour contents into condom.

Stick dick in condom.

???

Profit.
Click to expand...
 
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