I can never beat Utah

S

snowbladesforlife

Active member
In the 12 trips I have driven across Utah I have always attempted to never set foot on the ground, but it's never happened. With this being my last trip, I thought it was feasible. Utah can suck a fat dick and I will never go back. If you are from Southern Utah (Green River, Richfield, Beaver, Cedar City or Saint George) I would go to your local WalMart, since every town there over 1000 people has one (I have nothing against WalMart, I patronize it heavily, but when it makes up 90% of your town's sales then it seems kind of socialist or completely efficient, I'm not sure) buy a gun, put it in your mouth and pull the trigger. It will just make your life a lot better. Look I'm sure UT is sweet if you're from Ohio or Minnesota or something, but it seriously sucks dick. Southern UT is fucking weird, there are several towns that I believe are just 1 large Mormon family and why is the windshield wiper fluid at gas stations always really clean? I mean that's cool, but it's creepy as fuck.

So back to the point, my car was running well and had gotten close to 30 MPG and I topped off at Grand Junction, the Utah of Colorado. It is about 400 miles from there to the Nevada border and I thought I had it. I was planning a McCormick's shot and a victory jerk for the border passing.

I had it all planned out. I wasn't going to make it rain on I-70 like usual and get another ticket from officer Brigham Young. I was going to stay at more fuel efficient 85 MPH. But I got complacent. Well I had to refuel and touch that bullshit UT ground.

cliff notes: FUCK UTAH.

 
Southern utah is its own fucking country. if you were in Slc/PC you'd be like"OMGOMG so sweeeeeeet!!!!11!1!1"
 
whenever im goiung through bumfuk utah i'll stop at some gas station and a little water spring in moab. In the first part of provo theres a legit sandwich shop, outher than that, fuck mormons
 
Haha, this thread is awesome! I visit Utah to go mountain biking every year, but I make a point to never speak to anyone unless they:

A) Are from out of state or

B) Force me into a conversation

And SLC really isn't much better, the people there still suck (for the most part). Out of all the large cities I have been to it is definitely my least favorite, hands down.
 
Hahaha good one. Maybe actually try visiting SLC and PC, you'll change your mind about that. The fact you've just been on I70, which is in southern utah, which is probably the shittiest part of utah other than moab. You're funny though.

Oh did i mention that you're a complete moron? And you also sound like you're 12. Grow up.
 
hahaha i totally agree with you. my parents dragged me to st. george once and i sucked so much dick! plus, utah is totally tainted to me, because i have to go to provo every couple of years. its like the stepford wives there.
 
your name has snowblade in it. this proves you don't know anything about the universe.

ohio p0wns.

actually, the skiing is rediculously bad in all honesty.
 
SLC and PC creep the fuck out of you? You're an ignorant little cunt aren't you?
 
so you don't like Utah and think it's creepy because you think that some towns are made of one family and the wiper fluid is clean?

i'm pretty sure you are a troll

 
How would you even know? You have your own fucking ego shoved so far up your ass you think you know everything. Just stop, your opinion is so ridiculously bias that you just shouldnt even talk.
 
SLC is fuckin sick...but i thought your last 2 paragraphs were hilarious. i have definitely driven through some of those towns on the way to aspen and there are indeed creepy.
 
At least i base my opinion on things ive experienced, not on things that i think i know.
 
Honestly, aside from skiing why do think UT is that cool?

Did you get a handski from a horse-faced, swamp donkey at a party or something and now you think it's sweet?
 
OMG how did you know! Once again, sorry that utah isn't full of a bunch of dumbshit blonde bitches going to fashion school, utah isn't california, sorry.
 
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