I AM SO FUCKED RIGHT NOW ! SOOOO FUCKED

eat your undies

zurfluh.jpg
 
when i opened this i thought it was gonna be another "dude omg i just smoked like 3 bowls and im hella fried" or something haha.. but i was wrong. i suggest eating 300 everything bagels so the poppy seeds increase the amount of opium in your system which will steal the attention away from the THC and make them think your into worse stuff. ITS FOOLPROOF!
 
Ive never had to deal with this before, so i couldnt really help you. But ive found to do all the following...

1) Drink a ton of water

2) Drink a ton of cranberry juice

3) Piss a few times the day of the test

4) Dont use the beginnings of your piss, use the middle.

5) Eat peanut butter cause it turns your piss yellow. (ive never heard this before)

6) Work out so you can sweat out the THC

7) You should be fine cause you dont havent done a lot of smoking

but did you know they were gonna give you this test? if so you are a dumbass man. hahaha
 
or take it one step further.. sauna, ton of water, wear some garbage bags as pants and a top and duct tape them to your legs and arms, then drag and exercise bike in there and go at it... mma cut weight program as well as a way to flush a shit ton of water..
 
2 shots of white vinegar before hand (it sucks but has worked for me in the past)lots of water and cranberry juiceniacin pills (they will make you sweaty and uncomfortable but you should if you want help)emergen-c (like powdered vitamin c so your pee isnt crystal clear)ora detox drink/kit from a nutrition store. somewhere that sells like protein and pills
oh and when you pee in the cup, use the middle of your piss to fill the cup. like dont try to fill the cup right when you start pissing. let it run a little then pee and dont wait for the end. i have heard that the THC comes out more at the beginning and end than in the middle.
 
i read this 1 and a half page about getting away from the test, and he said just drink a shit load of water, take some vitemins ( to coulor your pee ) piss only you mainstream, not your first or end strem, work out ( but not before the test stop working out 2 days before so you get the THC out) and crambeary jucie doesnt help more then water
 
exept that they came with a suprise test and hade taken a test two days before i smoke so i though is way like 0 % that they whould take a test within that month
 
well fuck you sir, read this :
exercises are burning fat and THC byproducts are released into the blood and urine that goes out while you cleansing your system. But it is important to stop burning fat cells near test time (up to 48 hours before your drug test). On test day, it doesn't matter what's in your lipid tissue. What's in your blood and urine does matter.
 
Drinking vinegar, green tea, coffee, cranberry juice, grapes, beer, iced tea will not help you pass a urinalysis because it neither masks THC in the urine nor eliminates it from fat cells. Moreover, some of these products will lower the pH balance of the urine. Home remedies are neither better nor cheaper than abstinence.

 
i personally recomend gettin on a exercise bike with a shit load of cranberry juice and riding till you cna't ride any more.

thc is in the fat so you gota burn some mass fat if you want to avoid jail and the cran will help flush the excess.

a few hours before you go take the test, drink mad amount of emergence/ take a bunch a vitamins, so your urin will be dilut but show up full of vitamins.

I think you'll be fine if you follow this regement.

good luck jedi.
 
cranberry juice along with green tea, beer, and coffee are no different than water apart from the fact that they are Diuretics-they increase the rate of urination.

D - diuretic

A diuretic is defined as any substance that increases urine output.

Caffeine, cranberry juice, and most "quick flush" herbal teas marketed

as "detoxifiers" are diuretics. Water,

though also effective in helping marijuana smokers "beat" the test, is

not a diuretic. Consuming diuretic fluids just prior to taking a urine

test dilutes the concentration of drug metabolites in the sample below

the threshold of detection. However, this effect is only temporarily.

Because marijuana’s primary metabolite

is fat soluble, consuming no amount of fluids – even diuretic fluids –

will permanently "flush" it out of one’s system. Once the short-term

effect of the diuretic wears off and the urine returns to its proper

concentration, cannabis metabolites will once again become readily

detectable to snooping drug screeners.

From NORML

but your real best bet is- with

W – water

Facing a drug test on short notice? Remember the phrase: "Just add

water." Drinking large quantities of water (e.g. 120 fluid oz) prior to

taking a urine test is the easiest, cheapest, and according to recent

testimony before Congress by the US Department of Health and Human

Services, still remains one of the most effective methods of beating a

urine test. In desperate circumstances, water may also be added

directly to a sample to dilute the specimen.

i had to play that game and was so fucking paranoid about testing in my own house, but luckily the rents were using the home drug test kits so i ended up peeing like a tiny amount in to add yellow, then filling the rest with water. Shit worked a couple times, but then they changed tests and the threshhold for thc amount was way lower. But whateva, glad you passed how much water you think you downed?
 
does anyone now if thc shows up in blood test, I haevent smoked in a 2 months but have a ua tomorrow, they will also be drawing blood and am kinda worried that it may show up in it?
 
yeah im pretty sure it can. but they wont test for it. and even if they see it theres the doctor confidentiality(USA. not sure about other countries) so they cant tell any one. plus 2 months is more than enough time. dont worry about it at all
 
Find someone with clean urine. Even if its your dog. Find a clean syringe.Suck up the urine. Find your bladder.....

and you know where I am going with this.

That is how the athletes do it unless they want to get caught using a wizzinator.
 
bahaha i love how this thread changed from winning something into omggzzz i have a drug test what do i do
 
this is true...except the THC that comes out of a piss test is the most recent layer of fat. If you have 18 hours before your test, you want to build a new layer of fat. eat as much fatty foods as you can, pig out and gain some weight. Im serious... Also, make sure your pee test is not your first urine of the day, piss when you wake up, take some vitamin B (to color your urine), drink a few more glasses of water than normal and hope for the best. Depending on your toxic level, your gonna be fine or fucked. good luck.
 
niacin can also be found in redoxen Vitamin B tablets, there like 3$ for 10 at a pharmacy, just go buy them, im pretty sure they flush your system, your pee is like neon green the first time you take one.
 
Its definitely not, water poisoning is literally just someone drowning themself ultimately. There was a very similar case about 5 years before that one where a frat was hazing its pledges and they were forced to drink 5 gallon waters and one of them died. Its pretty fucked up to actually think about.
 
you should stop acting like such a shithead because water will do NOTHING but maybe buy you some more time.

THC is fat soluble, soooooo STFU!
 
drinking water delutes your urine.... drinking water before the day of the test would do nothing. Although If you need to delute, water could do the trick.

drugs are bad for you. say no to drugs.
 
well if there not watching you pee (like they do in sports drug tests). just get a bladder thing (bag with a tube) and get a friend to pee in it and then just drain it into the cup.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top