How the fuck do I take care of a fish

NotGhood

Active member
Recently got drunk and purchased a fish, any other NS fish owners could you give me some fish care basics? Much appreciated.
 
fish get lonely when you leave them at home, so if ur on the go just swallow a bunch of water and house him/her in your belly and ralph it up when you get home
 
I feed mine twice a day. Remember not to let him swim after eating, and make sure to take them on at least a 15 min walk daily. He's slow and always throws a temper tantrum during the walk, He just throws himself on the ground and rolls around. I don't give into his fussing. He stops in a min or two. He mist be really tired from today's walk because he just seems to be sleeping. Love my fish.
 
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from what i remember you want to let the microbial ecosystem get set up in the tank before you introduce any fish to the tank.
 
my friend has a really pretty fish named jesus. he keeps it in a container the size of a fist and feeds it every day. his first one died while he was walking it home from the pet store. also he recommends buying a life time supply of fish food. its like $2 and the size of a pepper shaker.
 
13637574:skierman said:
Fish love PBR

That's for freshwater fish. If it's a saltwater fish they prefer landshark. Also Mexican fish don't like Coronas; Dos Equis is their general preference.
 
Well you may want to save it from drowning so obviously take it out of the water so it can get some air
 
I drove this fucker to fucking Petsmart in the freezing fucking cold instead of fucking my girl so that he could pick the wrong fucking coloured fish and give it a shitty ass name, all while squatting on the floor of the shop drunkenly falling over everywhere trynna pick out a tank and attempting to slay the assistant at the same time. The fish is probably already dead, it's name is Alan, which I think is just a word puzzle thing that starts with some latin shit, for anal, so it's called Anal now, and it has the cheapest tank that any alcoholic fish abuser could afford. Honestly might have to start a gofundme thing so we can give this fish a betta existance with some underwater palm trees n shit. You don't know how sad this fish is going to be. OP/Daveyboi/Notghood is gonna run outof food and start feeding it popper resin because he has no other choice. You should all have never encouraged him :'( you don't know what you've caused
 
Back in high school some kid bought a fish in one of those plastic bags they come in and drank the whole thing.

Going to try and find the video and post it here
 
13637713:spliff.Life said:
that way you can chill with it too

Nothing feels better than when the fin tickles your sack. The best part is, in the eyes of the law its not considered bestiality and when you cum, cleanup is easy and worse case scenario you can say its fish poop.
 
13637715:skierman said:
Nothing feels better than when the fin tickles your sack. The best part is, in the eyes of the law its not considered bestiality and when you cum, cleanup is easy and worse case scenario you can say its fish poop.

part of me thinks you're just spitting a pretty fucked up joke. Then another part of me thinks after seeing your cunt mushed of a head that you actually try to fuck a fish.
 
13637704:.Jacob said:
I drove this fucker to fucking Petsmart in the freezing fucking cold instead of fucking my girl so that he could pick the wrong fucking coloured fish and give it a shitty ass name, all while squatting on the floor of the shop drunkenly falling over everywhere trynna pick out a tank and attempting to slay the assistant at the same time. The fish is probably already dead, it's name is Alan, which I think is just a word puzzle thing that starts with some latin shit, for anal, so it's called Anal now, and it has the cheapest tank that any alcoholic fish abuser could afford. Honestly might have to start a gofundme thing so we can give this fish a betta existance with some underwater palm trees n shit. You don't know how sad this fish is going to be. OP/Daveyboi/Notghood is gonna run outof food and start feeding it popper resin because he has no other choice. You should all have never encouraged him :'( you don't know what you've caused

u needa chill
 
Don't fill up the fish bowl with regular water. Fishes swim better and are healthier in piss water so be sure to drink a lot of water and piss into the bowl until it's full.
 
get an oxygenator for the tank and blow some fatty bong rips in the intake hole

btw what is the fish's name?
 
13638126:Anguz_li said:
you changed your name to "the fish" just to reply with "my name is Connor".. nice.

You should change your name to the.idiot after that reply
 
remember to pet it twice a day. and let it listen to NWA. After a while he'll have learned most of the songs and will offer hours of enjoyment when the internet is down,
 
I'm looking at getting into to salt water fish business this summer, hmu if you have a 50 gallon fish tank for sale.
 
For the liquid in the tank you want it to be 5 parts water, 3 parts piss, 1 part semen, and 1 part Kors vodka. Then when it comes to food fish need T bone steaks twice a day to grow big and strong. They also like cool ranch doritos for snacks and be careful because any other type of doritos will kill it. After you have followed this routine every day for exactly 420 days you will want to eat the fish.
 
Make sure you get a good leash for your fish. They love to go on walks when they are on a fish leash, especially with other fish.

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Thanks to the community's help and resourcefulness my fish Alan is doing well,

Without you NS fish lovers I could no have kept him alive this long

I owe you a debt of gratitude

:^)
 
13641042:NotGhood said:
Thanks to the community's help and resourcefulness my fish Alan is doing well,

Without you NS fish lovers I could no have kept him alive this long

I owe you a debt of gratitude

:^)

Glad your new fish Alan is doing well, but what happened to Anal?
 
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